Uphill Both Ways
by BLVD4476
Summary: Fitz finds out Mellie was raped, but how will he handle his new feelings towards her attacker, his own father, and trying to help his wife heal at the same time?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

Mellie sat on their warm bed, covered in a blue comforter and hand knit blanket by her grandmother as a wedding gift, unable to feel the space heater blowing warm air on her feet. All she could feel was the lonely, cold January air wrap itself around her. She looked around their master bedroom in a daze, seeing the same white carpet, the same soft green walls with white baseboards, the same large square window directly across from the bed and the same lace curtains at its edges. She noticed the same wooden furniture along the wall, the same white wooden door to the left of the bed that led to their closet.

She heard the same ceiling fan circulating. She saw the same lights in the backyard shining through the window. She even heard the same songs her husband liked to sing while he was in the shower coming from the bathroom, and the water quickly cut off.

She was the only thing that was different.

She came back around and looked down at her pink cotton pajama pants and white undershirt, feeling like she might throw up if she didn't tell him soon. She needed to tell someone, but trusted no one. Her mind was going as fast as it could, trying to piece together the courage and words to tell him that his own father raped her only six weeks ago. How could she possibly explain her feelings towards Jerry to him, what a sick and twisted, sex-crazed pervert he was? How could she talk about his own father like that to him? The fear of Fitz not believing her lingered in the back of her mind as she continued to listen to him in the bathroom, the sink running, the shower curtain being pulled back. She knew by now that he was brushing his teeth and combing his hair, and she didn't have much longer left to come up with a plan. Her body began to tense up and she went in and out of the daze, trying to forget Jerry's tightening grip on her arms, his panting body on top of hers, her forceful hands, his wicked smile as he stole her innocence and love. She tried to forget it all and think of how to tell Fitz, but couldn't come up with anything. Her hands got cold and she felt a tightening in the pit of her stomach as the bathroom door opened and the light went off, but she didn't know if it was nerves or the baby.

_The baby_, she thought.

She had almost forgotten. She never could get her mind fully off him. They were having a baby. An actual replica of the two of them.

They had gone to the doctor early that chilly morning, looking like snow, and sat in the waiting room.

The warmth couldn't get to her there either. She put on like nothing was wrong as they waited for their name to be called. She held her husband's hand when he offered it, and rested her head on his shoulder, making sure he knew nothing.

Come to think of it, no one knew.

A youthful, cheery voice rang out above the soft sound of the two televisions in the blue painted room filled with uncomfortable chairs.

"Grant?"

They both looked up at the same time and saw the nurse holding a clipboard and smiling. They got up, her leading the way, her sheepskin boots making loud thuds with every step. The nurse gave her a gown to put on and a cup, and showed her the bathroom. Mellie came out a few minutes later, still with her pants on because of how cold she was, in that hideous blue polka dot paper gown. She saw Fitz down the hall, leaned against the wall, reading a brochure he found about estrogen. He heard her boots hit the tile floor and looked up, putting it back in its slot box and going towards her.

"Aren't you cute," Fitz said with a smile, hugging her. "The nurse said for us to wait in room three."

Mellie rolled her eyes and denied it. "It's not cute."

She hated these ugly things more every time she got near a hospital. They go in and the nurse comes up, shutting the wooden door behind them and putting her chart in it for the OB-GYN. Mellie sat on the exam table and Fitz sat in the chair against the wall, feeling cramped, and observing the row of cold, metal tools laid out along the countertop.

"So do they…?"

"Yeah," Mellie replied quickly, hoping she doesn't get poked around too much. "Not the most fun time of your life."

"I bet not," Fitz sighed as he shuddered, his gray jacket not helping much with the cold air. He can tell she's nervous, but also excited. Her blue eyes always widened when she was anxious about anything, and he tried not to stare, but as he turned his head to the door, a little smile formed on his face. She had caught him looking and asked him about it.

"Whatcha thinking about over there?"

She puts her hands on the cool fabric on the table, letting her upper body weight fall in her arms as she swung her feet back and forth slowly. His eyes met hers and his smile widened. He readjusts his leather watch on his left wrist as he crosses his legs.

"Nothing. I can tell you're anxious about this, that's all."

She smiles and looks down at her feet in embarrassment. "So are you."

She tries to hide her fear, the fear of, if she is pregnant, the baby not being Fitz's. She immediately remembers that night again, replaying all of it over and over, unable to stop it, unable to think of happier times of her and Fitz making love, unable to-

The steel door opened slowly, to her surprise. Apparently she hadn't heard the doctor knock. She watched Dr. Ryde come in, dressed in gray slacks, a white button down, gray heels, and a white lab jacket with her name across the left breast, and OB-GYN behind it.

"How are you today, Mrs. Grant?" Dr. Ryde asks, shaking both of their hands.

"Fine, how are you?" Mellie thought it was awfully rude of her to assume she was now a Mrs. just because Fitz had come with her, but overlooked it. She had other things on her mind.

"I'm good. I understand you're here to determine if you're pregnant?"

Dr. Ryde pulled a rolling chair out from under the counter desk, sitting down in it and setting Mellie's chart on the table as she takes off her glasses. Mellie keeps her eyes focused on the doctor, but feels Fitz still staring at her, at her broken body. Mellie nods gently, seeing Fitz smile out of the corner of her eye.

"When was your last cycle?"

"December 8th."

Dr. Ryde writes a few things down and gets back to her questions. "So it's been two weeks since you've missed your period. Is that unusual or not? Have you made any changes lately, like diet, exercise, sex, work?"

Mellie puts her hands together and rests them in her lap, tucking her hair behind her left ear, noticing her wedding ring. She never really looked at it all the time any more; they had been married seven years already. But right then, she noticed it, and realized Jerry stole everything it ever meant from her.

She remembers the doctor asked her a question.

"A week off is extreme. A day or two, not so bad. Nothing new, really. A couple of conferences and presentations coming up. I guess you could say we had sex more often than normal?" She replies, hoping that answered the question. She didn't want to have to think about them. She looks over at Fitz and he laughs softly, sitting up straight in the chair, uncrossing his legs and letting his brown suede shoe soles rest on the floor. He shrugs and smiles, looking at Dr. Ryde, then his wife.

"A little bit. I can't help I have a gorgeous, loving wife."

Mellie blushes and Dr. Ryde smiles a little, writing things down on the chart. Fitz pulls his phone out and checks his emails and social media.

"So it sounds like things are going well, then. Have you felt any different, noticed any symptoms?" She asks, tapping her pen gently on the countertop.

'_Of course something's different, I was raped_,' Mellie thought. All she can see in her mind is Jerry over her, and she remembers that awful feeling of him penetrating her, taking everything good from her. She closes her eyes and chokes out a few words.

"Not that I know of."

"Ok. Well, I would like to take another specimen and examine you, just to be sure."

Mellie nods her head again, the words piling up in her throat, but unable to speak.

"Would you like to do this alone?" Dr. Ryde asks, seeing she is obviously nervous and looks at Fitz.

"He can stay if he wants," Mellie sighs quietly, really not wanting him to be there, to see her soiled body.

Fitz looks up at her and shrugs. "It's whatever you want me to do, baby."

Mellie stands up and takes her shoes and pants off, folding them up neatly and setting them on the table. She almost takes her panties off but stops before she does and sighs.

"I... would like to do this in private," she says quietly, keeping her head down, unable to look at Fitz. He looks up from his phone again and is slightly confused, but understands. It gives her a better sense of comfort and confidentiality being alone.

"I'll be out in the hall if you need me, Mels," he says, wanting to let her know he was still there if she needed comforting. He stands up and puts his phone in his pocket, opening the door and closing it behind himself. He sits in a chair a few yards away, still wondering what the deal was. It's not like they're strangers; they've had sex before. They know each other inside and out.

Mellie takes off her panties and sits back down on the table, lying back and putting her feet in the stirrups. She feels like she's going to freeze before it all gets over with as she watches Dr. Ryde wash her hands and put on latex gloves.

"It'll be over quick, I promise. Will barely feel a thing," Dr. Ryde assures her as she picks up a small metal tool and sits back down on the stool, rolling over to the table. She can sense something's not entirely right with Mellie, and wonders if it has to do with the visit. She turns on the light and repositions it, then sees Mellie with her eyes closed tightly.

"Just relax for me, Mellie. We can't have you all tense now."

Mellie lets out a big sigh, feeling her body rest slowly, her muscle relaxing, heart being uplifted. She feels at peace for the first time, like all of her burdens disappeared, like she was back to nor-

It all changed the second she felt that cold piece of metal scraping her insides.

'_It's all in my mind,_' she thought, remembering she needed to relax her body. Jerry couldn't have control of her anymore. He couldn't control her mind, her thoughts, her feelings. But he did. His actions controlled her emotions and made her think and plan out every single move she made, all in order to be a step ahead. She tried to think of happier times, like back to when she and Fitz met back in law school, going on their first date, falling in love, him proposing to her, all of it took her back, sent her into a calming daze, so calm she didn't hear Dr. Ryde when she said she was finished.

"Mellie?"

Mellie opened her eyes and realized it was all over, and she could relax, but also be tense. She never understood how someone could be both until now.

"We're done for today. You can get dressed and I should have the results by tomorrow, maybe sooner. I'll call you when I do. Good luck to you and Mr. Grant."

She takes off the gloves and throws them in the trashcan, washing her hands again. She gathers her clipboard and puts the stool back under the counter, then grabs the chart and sees Mellie sit up.

"If you need me, call me. Good seeing you again."

She walks out of the room and Mellie sighs with relief, lying back on the table again for a moment. She quickly gets down and gets dressed, thinking the whole time.

What if she really was pregnant?

The thought, the shock of it all had never occurred to her. What if she was pregnant? They would become parents, they would have to take care of a helpless human for years, giving up part of their lives to mold another.

She and Fitz were always careful, but had never thought about kids or even talked about having any yet. They were still young. She was only 33, and he was 37, the youngest governor in the history of Texas. They had time if they wanted some babies. But they never showed much interest, so they never talked about it. She was on the pill, had been since college, as a precaution, and they used a condom when they were worried about the pill not working, which was rare. But they were still safe, and the pill had always worked, possibly until now. She shook her head, reminding herself it would all play out the way God intended, and went out into the hallway to find Fitz.

She found him sitting in a plastic black chair at the end of the hall, his phone in hand, reading popular articles of the day on Yahoo. He heard her footsteps and looked up, putting his phone away and standing up.

"How did it go?"

He opens his arms for a hug and she embraces him, trying to not let on her hesitation. His arms fit perfectly around her body and his hands rest on her lower back as he places kisses on the top of her head. She closes her eyes and she feels ok for once, safe, almost back to who she used to be.

"She said she would call us when she got the tests back," Mellie told him.

"So what are you thinking right now?"

He pulls away slowly and they start down the hall, back through the lobby full of women and out to his truck. As they get in and he turns it on to warm up, he can tell she's hesitant to answer.

"I'm excited," she pauses, taking a deep breath. "But I'm scared."

"What makes you scared?" Fitz asks, wondering why she could possibly be scared about such an amazing thing. He looks at her, noticing her gray sweater matching her sheepskin boots, her hair resting beautifully around the outline of her face. He thinks about it himself, and realizes he's afraid too. They'll have to learn how to adjust to taking care of a baby, managing work and staying up with him or her, going to doctors, looking at pre-schools, finding the best babysitter, and most of all, they'll have to learn how to find time for each other.

Mellie looks down at the gray mat in the floorboards, then at the radio clock-10:27 a.m.

'_What am I scared about? Only the fact that 'our baby' could really be your father's son, your brother,_' she thought.

His brother.

That was one of the most painful thoughts, one that made her feel the guiltiest of all. What if the child she was possibly carrying was her husband's brother? It sounded like some backwoods, in-bred story or something she would only think of coming from a drama or nightmare. But it was real, a real possibility.

"Having to devote all our time to raising this child, the fact that another human is growing inside of me, that we created it and now we have to love and nurture it for the rest of our lives. You're the governor, you're busy with your work, so am I, and I don't know how we'll ever have time to even eat or sleep or anything else when this baby comes. I just...I just don't know about it. And I'm not suggesting an abortion, I would never even have to think twice about that. That will never happen unless it was absolutely necessary. But are we really ready to be responsible for someone else's life?" She asked, it really hitting him hard.

Fitz settled back into the leather seat, realizing everything she said was true. They had learned how to take care of each other, or so he thought, but figuring out how to care for a child that can't even speak and to do it for years was going to be a whole new ball game.

"I don't know the answer. That will just have to be something we'll find out along the way. But I do know that we will figure it out and you will be a good mother. Worry about all of that when the time comes, Mel," He says, running his fingers through his wavy hair.

He sighs quietly and backs up, then gets back on the road to go home. He looks over at her and can tell she's still worried about something. He can see it in her eyes, in her nonexistent smile.

"Something else bothering you, baby?"

It took everything in her not to scream, not to yell out for help. For him to hear her cries would be the greatest thing. Maybe he could help her, but she hadn't built up the strength to tell him. Not yet. She looked out the window and answered him quietly.

"It's nothing."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Feel free to leave reviews. Thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

Mellie sat in her office later that afternoon, staring at the phone. She had changed into one of his gray long sleeve shirts to get comfortable. His scent always calmed her for some reason; it had ever since they met. She was leaned back in her large brown leather chair behind her solid cherry oak desk, supposed to be writing a bulletin on cutting higher education costs. She hadn't even started editing it yet. Her pen moved back and forth between her fingers as she stared at the phone, then back at her computer screen. She knew she needed to write. She knew it had to be done, but she was too worried about this phone call instead. She was fixed upon it, like staring would make it ring faster. This call would change their lives forever.

The phone rang.

She snatched the phone off the receiver before even looking at the caller ID. Her heart was beating fast and her voice was shaky, like it always got when she was nervous. She felt her hand shaking, but couldn't make it stop as she stared at the pages on the screen before her.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby. I was just wondering if you would like to make a trip to the office after the doctor calls. I need to get a few things and make a few calls, and we could get some dinner at the place a few blocks from the Capitol that you like," Fitz suggested as he sat in his office, not getting a whole lot of work done either.

Mellie sighed as she closed her eyes, wishing it had been the doctor. She wished to be put out of her anxious misery, to be able to breathe again for a few seconds. She realized this was the first time she had worried about something other than Jerry, and now, of course, she did.

"I don't know. I still have to edit my bulletin and have it sent to Jackson by tomorrow morning, and it's already 5:30. They probably won't call back until tomorrow now. Why did you call me when my office is right down the hall from yours?"

Fitz smiles and looks around the room, wondering himself why he didn't just get up and go see her. He sees the overhead lamp reflecting in his shoes as his feet are propped up on his desk. He puts them down and gets up, leaving the phone off the receiver, and going down the hall. He stops at her office, his hands in his pockets as he walked in with a smile.

"I don't know why I didn't just come see you. It's _much_ nicer seeing you in person than just hearing your voice."

Mellie smiled and blushed a little, looking down at her desk calendar and back up at him.

"It won't take an hour at the office. And it's only fifteen minutes out from here."

He walks behind her desk, his boots loud against the hardwood floor, and kisses the top of her head, running his hands across her shoulders. She closes her eyes, wishing he would stop. She had to constantly remind herself that he thought nothing was wrong and she needed to play along. She stood up and wrapped her arms around his waist, standing on her tiptoes to kiss him. His hands rested on her lower back as their tongues met slowly. She thought she was going to throw up. She couldn't handle the feeling, the sensation. His warm, gentle kisses in the crook of her neck made her gasp and cringe. It felt good to her, felt good to feel something after feeling absolutely nothing. Being numb was killing her. He ran his fingers through her hair and pulled her body closer to his, wrapping her legs around his thighs. She didn't understand how she could be so turned on yet so turned off at the same time. She didn't deserve to be loved like this. She already was worthless enough to get raped. His kisses start to go deeper and his hands move lower, using them to pull her body in closer to his again. She knew he was enjoying this, and she longed to also, but couldn't. Not truly. Her heart beat faster and faster, and she hoped he couldn't feel it like she felt him getting excited.

Mellie kept her eyes closed and continued kissing him, her hands on his shoulder blades now as his moved to her waist, rubbing circles on her stomach. He moved slowly down her body, tugging on her jeans zipper and unbuttoning her pants. She knew she was about to have to have sex with him. She was going to be sick.

'God, _please_ let the phone ring, please, don't make me do this. I can't handle this-'

The phone rang and they both pulled away simultaneously. She paused to look at the caller ID this time and saw it was Dr. Ryde's office. She picked it up and sat on the desk, answering in her deep, worried tone.

"Hello?"

"Good afternoon, is this Mrs. Grant?" Dr. Ryde answered, the raspy voice on the other end not sounding like the Mellie she knew.

"Yes."

Dr. Ryde sat in her work office, seeing that Mellie was the last call she had to make, and it was a good one. She looked over at her degrees on the wall and back at the phone, glad she was a doctor.

"How are you this evening?"

"Fine, you?" Mellie asks, keeping her eyes fixed on the floor.

"I'm good. I was just calling to tell you we got the results back from this morning."

Mellie looked up at Fitz, who was incredibly anxious, and back down at her shining wedding ring. She sat on the edge of the desk and listened carefully.

"Ok."

"It came back positive. You're pregnant. Congratulations to you and Governor Grant."

Mellie's heart skips a beat, from nervousness and excitement, and she keeps a straight face as to not let on to Fitz. She's also scared, wondering who's the father and if Dr. Ryde could sense something was wrong. She tries to keep her voice mellow, almost a little bit sad.

"Wow. Well...thank you for calling. What should we do now?" Mellie asks woefully.

Fitz's head dropped in sadness, putting his hands on his hips and turning around, then waiting for her to get off the phone to tell him the bad news.

"Now that we know you're pregnant, I would like you to come in soon for another exam and an ultrasound. We need to get started on figuring out a due date as soon as possible and discuss lifestyle changes and such. Tomorrow afternoon isn't too busy. Would around two work for you?" Dr. Ryde asked, doodling on her desk calendar.

"Of course. I'll be there then."

"I'll see you tomorrow then. Good night, Mrs. Grant. Congratulations." Dr. Ryde smiles as she hangs up, happy for the two of them.

"Thank you. Have a good night."

Mellie hangs up the phone and looks down at her feet, not saying anything Fitz. She could feel the tension coming from him, and she couldn't believe it - she was pregnant. She was terrified now. What if the baby was Jerry's? Would she tell Fitz? She felt a tingling inside her and the thought crossed her mind again.

_'If I have an abortion, we'll know for sure that the next child is Fitz's. I wouldn't have to tell him. I could just go get this done tomorrow while he was away and no one would ever know but me.'_

'_God'_, she thought as she shook her head slightly, tears coming to her eyes, ashamed that she ever even thought of such. She could never do that. Kill a child. That was insane. She wasn't a murderer.

Fitz steps closer and puts his arm around her, resting his head on hers. He closes his eyes, trying not to cry, and whispers softly to her, knowing they're both fragile and upset right now.

"Mellie...I am _so_ sorry," he whispers softly.

Mellie nods and wipes her tears away, trying to hide both her fear and a smile. She pulls away a little and looks up at him, then back at her lap.

"I know none of this was planned, but it's still hard to deal with a loss regardless..."

"_Fitz_," she said in a tone that made him shut up, the one tone he knew was always dead serious.

"Be quiet."

He realizes he's said too much and feels bad as he watches her look up at him.

"Ok," he said softly, kissing her forehead.

"I don't know why you're all sad. She said I was pregnant."

Mellie smiles a little and his jaw drops, both shocked that she had him believing otherwise and the fact that they were having a baby. It quickly turned into a grin and he hugged her tightly, then pulled back to see her reaction.

"You totally had me fooled and all upset. God, Mel, we are going to be parents. _You and me. Parents_. Never thought I would see this day," he says, now overcome with happiness.

Mellie smiles and holds his hand, not sure she could handle any more physical affection right now.

"You should've seen your face. It was priceless. And I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done it, but it was worth seeing the look on your face," she tells him as she tries not to laugh.

Fitz smiles and squeezes her hand.

"Ha ha, very funny. So when do we start buying baby stuff and going to doctors and eating strange food and getting new clothes?" He asks excitedly.

Mellie smiles and nudges him with her free hand, loving his sense of humor.

"I'm going back to the doctor tomorrow for another exam and an ultrasound so we can figure out how far along we are."

"Can I come with?"

"Don't you need to work?"

"Damn, that new bill has to be approved by tomorrow. How about this: I'll do that tonight, go in tomorrow morning, and take off the afternoon and go with you," he suggests with a smile, not wanting to miss a thing.

"If you want to," she says, having to brush it off in her mind. She wishes he wouldn't come and see her undress again. It still bothered her, but she wasn't ready to tell him.

"So when can I start bragging about how we're having a baby? Tomorrow?" Fitz jokingly asks, ready to tell all his colleagues and friends.

Mellie laughs again and shakes her head. They get up and he gets the keys to the truck and they put their jackets on by the door.

"Hold off for a few months. There's still possibility for problems in the first weeks and we should wait to tell anyone."

"Months? The excitement is going to _kill_ me, Mels."

She smiles and grabs her purse as they walk out the door into the cold, January air and to the truck. She noticed Jerry's car was gone for the fourth day, and hoped he would never come back.

They drive out to the Texas Capitol with security in tow and Fitz flashes his badge as he pulls up to the guard shack with his window down. All of this still felt new to Mellie every time they came here or to an event or meeting. He was elected in 2012 and this month marked a year in office, but it was still strange being in the spotlight. He sees the guard get up from his computer and come out to talk.

"Good evening, Governor Grant. Mrs. Grant. How are you today?" Martin, the security guard, asked as he approached the truck. Fitz had always liked Martin. For a fifty-six year old cop, he was still getting around good and hanging with the best of them.

"We're fine, Martin. You?" Fitz said, extending his hand. Martin shook it and looked back toward the main building, the back to Fitz.

"Oh, fine. Things have been quiet around here today. Glad to see someone working."

They all laugh softly and Martin lets them go, watching them as they drive off towards the east side of the building.

Fitz finishes up the new bill while Mellie talks with Jackson in his office. They loved having him as their PR guy; he was the best in town. He always took care of them and made them look good.

After stopping at Mellie's favorite restaurant and getting something to eat, they head back home to get ready for bed. As soon as they pull up into the driveway, she notices Jerry's gray 1987 Mustang sitting on the other side. Her hands begin to sweat, knowing she can't handle facing him. She had only seen him twice since that night, once in passing going in the house, and once in the kitchen. They barely spoke, but he knew where they stood. He knew he owed her not to tell the world.

As Fitz came out of the now dark bathroom, wearing his blue striped boxers and white t-shirt, he could tell she was deep in thought. He walked over to the right side of the bed and turned his lamp on, and turned the bedroom light off, creating a soft glow throughout the room. He laid across the bed from his side, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and resting his head by her hip. He absolutely loved the way his cotton shirts felt on her amazing body. She tenses up, trying not to let him feel her physical and emotional resistance.

She was afraid.

Afraid that their baby wasn't really 'theirs', and that this precious child was that monster's. Fitz didn't even know yet.

If it were true, it would probably be the death of her.

"You got any baby names in mind yet?" He asks, resting his head against her side.

She turns around, crossing her legs and facing him, admiring his eagerness. He is stunned by her silky brown curls as they rest gently over her shoulders, how beautiful it made her. She wanted to look him in the eyes, but couldn't. It hurt too much to make any kind of close connection, and to see that tiny trace of Jerry in him. She decided to keep the answers short.

"No. You?"

"If it's a boy, I was thinking Clark or Chase. For a girl, Savannah or Harper. I'm happy either way."

He can tell something is distracting her, that something is eating away at her, that she won't rest until it stops. He can see it in her distant, sparkling blue eyes. Her breathing is unsteady, shaky, and she isn't saying much to him. Not like normal. He doesn't know of anything different right off that could be bothering her. He sits up and tries to offer his hand, but she doesn't even notice.

"You ok, Mels?" he asks, concerned.

Mellie closes her eyes and exhales slowly, shaking her head no. She knew this point in time would come sooner or later, and here it was, like a slap in the face. She could feel him watching her, trying to decode her expressions and emotions. She couldn't think about it because her mind was going in a billion different directions, trying to figure out how to keep it together and tell him at the same time. She couldn't even remember how to form all the right words to speak. Her heart feels like it's going to beat out of her chest if she doesn't hurry up.

Her hands begin to tremble slightly as they grip the blue down comforter draped across the king sized bed. Fitz was seriously concerned because he had never seen his wife like this; he needed to know what was going on.

"What's wrong, baby?"

He faces her, placing his warm hand on her leg. She gasps softly and her eyes flutter open, but she hopes he didn't notice her startled reaction. He quickly pulls his hand back and gets closer to her.

"I can't ... you didn't ... just ..."

Mellie stutters, tripping over her words, unable to complete a sentence, barely able to form a few words. She has to tell him before it eats her alive. She just can't figure out how to go about it. She decides to just jump into it and hope she can find the strength to do it. She closes her eyes and her voice is quiet and shaky as she tries to talk to him.

"A couple weeks ago ... it was ... one night ... I don't know why ..."

She feels a panic attack coming on as her body begins to shake and her breathing gets shallow. She feels her chest getting tighter and tighter with each breath, each heartbeat. She feels like everything is slowly closing in on her as Fitz takes her hand, cautious not to get too close.

"Mels ... just talk to me. Take your time," he says softly.

She takes a deep breath, opening her eyes, unable to make direct eye contact with him as her hands shake more and he squeezes them tighter. She finds a little bit of courage to tell him what happened.

"It happened ... you were already asleep ... Jerry ..."

She pauses and stumbles over his name, hating it with so much passion.

" ... and I were in the study. He ... had too much to drink and ... We started talking. He invited me ... to sit down on the couch with him."

Fitz listens intently and says nothing, but the lump forming in the back of his throat and his heart beating faster tells him everything. He knows something bad happened, but tries not to believe it could have.

"So we sit down ... and he _reeked_ of scotch ... he moved closer and ... leaned over and told me I was beautiful ... and the next thing I know is ... "

She stops, like someone took the words right out of her mouth, took away her ability to speak. Her eyes and expression scream shock, and his eyes fill with tears and anger. His heart sinks, wishing it wasn't true, hoping it was just a dream that he would wake up from. He opens his mouth and chokes on the terrible question he has to have an answer to. But before he could make the words come out, she already answered it.

" ... he was raping me."

She closes her eyes and shakes her head, tears running down her face. Fitz looks away, fighting back tears, trying to be strong for her, and trying not to let on him being ready to kill his own father right now. He moves beside her, wrapping his arms around her and holding her shaking, fragile body close, despite her efforts to pull away.

"I remember it vividly. I wish I could unsee it, _unlive_ it ... " she whispers.

Her voice cracks and her stray tears turn into sobs as she tries to finish. He sheds a few tears and wipes hers away, trying to reassure her he is here and will protect her.

"I ... I tried to get him off, I tried my hardest. I fought him and screamed ... but I couldn't get free. I couldn't - "

"I know you did. You don't have to tell me any more if you don't want to. None of this is your fault. I'm here, baby," he says, his voice breaking again, feeling horrible.

He feels guilt eating away at him as he holds her in his arms, rocking back and forth gently, wondering how he didn't hear her cries that night, how he didn't hear her struggle. He wishes he could do it all over, staying awake a little bit longer so he could stop Jerry and protect her.

The thought never crossed his mind. He never once believed his father would rape her. Not Mellie. Not his daughter-in-law, not his son's wife, not the woman he had a relationship with. Fitz knew Jerry might try that on an aide of his, but never imagined he would do it to Mellie.

His heart skipped a beat.

What if the baby was his father's?

He pushed it to the back of his mind, not forgetting it, but knowing his first priority was taking care of his wife and handling him.

As he held his broken, sobbing wife in his arms, he knew he had to get her closure. He had to get to Jerry somehow. Fitz had never wanted to kill someone before, but if he got the chance, he would end his father's life.

He just had to figure out how to get away with murder.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Fitz sat in his study early that Saturday morning, looking at the clock and seeing it was eight. He rested his head on top of his crossed hands, closing his eyes. He didn't remember if he had even slept or not; he stayed up most of the night, trying to figure out how to deal with his father. He hadn't eaten breakfast. He wasn't hungry. He was sick to his stomach. He was focused.

He was thinking.

Thinking of how to confront his own father about raping his wife. He had to go about it rationally, otherwise it might backfire on him. His father was a smart and cunning, yet also deceiving, man. He knew how to get what he wanted and come out on top. Fitz didn't want this being turned around on him.

He thought about a gun. It would be quick, but shooting him was too obvious. Too loud. Too messy.

A knife was just as bad. He needed to get rid of the evidence, not create more with a pool of blood. He needed to clean it up fast.

He hears footsteps and opens his soft slate eyes. Mellie walks in to his surprise, wearing her old gray skinny jeans and one of his white t-shirts. She sits down in one of the wooden chairs in front of his desk, scanning over the books on the wall, wondering how he got any work done in here. It all seemed either entirely too interesting or extremely boring.

"You're up early," he says quietly.

Mellie looks down at her feet, then up again at him.

"So are you. What's got you in here on a weekend? No game on today?" She asks, knowing how much he hated missing football.

She was surprised to find him in here and not getting ready to watch a football game on TV later. That's how he spent most of his Saturdays unless he was really behind on work. He looks at her and down at the blank notepad on his desk.

"I've been thinking."

Fitz leans over, looking at the doorway, making sure he doesn't see Jerry nearby. He leans forward and lowers his voice.

"We'll talk about it later. Somewhere away from here."

Mellie nods and has a feeling she knows what it is. She twists her wedding ring around on her finger and he watches her closely, knowing she might not ever heal. But he knew he had to try to fix part of her and help shape this new Mellie.

"What do we do now?" he asks softly, looking up at her for an answer. He didn't know where to start.

"About what?" Mellie replies, really not wanting to get into this right now. She steps forward and leans against the front of his wooden desk, not wanting to raise her voice either.

"Do we go to a hospital first or a psychiatrist or … ?"

"Either way, the first thing they'll ask is if I know the offender. If I lied, it would haunt me forever. If he gets locked up, you'll never have a chance. Our careers would be put on the line here, Fitz. This could majorly affect the outcome of how much more we accomplish. I can't tell them," she whispers, unable to look him in the eyes.

"I know. I was up all night, thinking about every detail. First things first, we have to get you taken care of. I'll deal with him after. Why don't we eat something and go for a drive?"

"Of course."

She follows him into the kitchen where he makes them pancakes and coffee. They sit down side by side and eat quickly, ready to get away from there. Jerry comes in before they finish, and Fitz can feel the tension between him and Mellie as he sits down across from them.

"Morning. Mellie." He pauses and gives Fitz his usual look of disappointment. "Fitz."

"Hey."

He continues to eat, giving his wife a look while Jerry fixes his coffee, then sits down and reads the paper. Fitz fights the urge, the burning desire in his heart to go in the kitchen, get a knife, and walk up behind him, slitting his throat. He could do it quietly, almost unnoticed. He had to control himself. He had to stay calm and let everything play out.

Fitz took the back roads out to the edge of the county that cold January morning. He had learned them when he drove out here when he needed to think and get away from it all for a little bit. Even the truck's tires for perfectly in the ruts in the gravel and dirt roads.

He slows down and pulls into the parking lot of an old, abandoned convenience store. He felt a certain sadness as he studied it for the first time, seeing it's dirty windows, collapsing roof, and orange "Closed" sign on the glass door. He backed up to a wall and left it running, turning up the heat. He knew Mellie was still cold. He didn't have to ask or even look at her. He knew she was naturally more cold than he was, and winter was not her favorite season. He was comfortable in his jacket and jeans, but even with a sweater and his coat, she was freezing. He leaned back into his gray leather seat and sighed, never once in his life imagining they would ever be having this conversation.

"So ... it's totally up to you as to how we go about getting you taken care of. If you want to go to a public facility or hire someone private ... either is fine. Whatever makes you more comfortable. Don't worry about the cost," he said, not knowing how to get the ball rolling on this. All he knew was she needed help, and he was willing to do whatever it took to get it.

He added the cost comment because he knew she would, even after his telling her not to. They both came from wealthy families, but she was never the type to flaunt her money. She worked hard for everything she had ever done, and was rather simple for the daughter of the CEO of a technological company and a lawyer. Her smarts and natural beauty attracted him to her eleven years ago when he saw her on the first day of their law ethics class. She came in a dark red dress and medium black heels, her hair pulled back and glasses on. He walked to the front of the class, trying to find the perfect seat, when he noticed her in the front row. He had never seen another woman like her before, one just dripping with confidence and passion. She was prepared for class, had her notebook and pens already laid out. Class didn't even start for another twenty minutes; he was impressed. He didn't want to be too pushy, but knew if he didn't sit by her, he might lose her.

And the rest is history.

"If we go private, there's a less chance of this all becoming public within a matter of hours and us having to deal with it again then, facing the media, et cetera. Then all we have left to worry about is how to handle Jerry," she sighs.

She brings her knees to her chest, hugging them to keep warm but also to make her feel secure. Her heart is torn by all of this. She just wants to get help, to be semi-normal again, without causing a mass media riot. Fitz doesn't speak for a few seconds, looking out the windshield, then at her.

"You know ... we have options."

She knew by the tone of his voice, the deeper it got the more serious he was, that he had been thinking about it for a while.

"Options?" she asks questioningly, raising an eyebrow.

"Do the work ourselves. Slip him something untraceable, something ordinary... Or, or make sure he has something illegal in his possession. Get him on that, somehow, and let this all hit the fan when we're ready, when the time is right, and be done. There's also... I know some people who could help us out," Fitz said, going through every plan he had in his mind, every possible way he could kill Jerry.

Mellie couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth, planning to kill his own father.

But she could.

It sounded like a wonderful plan, to get rid of him forever, but also dangerous. She would always have that blood on her hands. Always be guilty, always have a secret. They would have to do it themselves. She shot down using someone else without hesitation.

"We are _not_ dragging someone else into this to give them a chance to tell everything one day. It's too risky. We're trying to close one door, not open another."

Fitz knows what she means, but snaps back with attitude.

"Would you rather kill him yourself?" he whispers through his clenched teeth, just trying to get rid of him.

"_Fitzgerald_..."

Fitz sighs, knowing it was wrong of him. He rubs his neck and tries to think this all through again.

"I'm sorry, Mel. I know where you're at. You want it done, not to do it yourself, not have that lingering over you for the rest of your life. I have to figure out how to do it. He's a sick man. Seeing a doctor couldn't help him. He screwed his way to the top and became a drunk. He's always been a bastard to everyone, taking advantage of people, doing anything to win..."

Mellie takes every word in and lets it sink in, deep. They sit in silence for a few moments, both in thought, and suddenly the idea comes to her.

"Get ahold of some black market painkillers, problem solved," she says under her breath in a low tone.

Fitz wonders what she's thinking, if she's even in her right mind.

"Do you... do you really think staging an overdose would work?" he asks in disbelief.

"Have you ever known prescription painkillers _not_ to work?" she fires back.

Fitz sighs, shaking his no in agreement, then nods curiously, his hand on his chin, wondering what she had in mind for it.

"So, what's your plan?"

"We'll get some Oxycodone, Valium, roofies, cocaine, something - and slip it in his food. It would be harder to dilute it in his liquor, he keeps it so close to him. We'll wake up the next morning, just like any other day, and find him unconscious, unresponsive in his bed. Call an ambulance in a panic, wonder how it happened, yet act normal. We don't know anything about his personal life besides he lives and works here. Once the police and TBI investigate and the autopsy is finished, we'll suddenly find his medicine while cleaning up his things, and remember he was taking something for his chronic arthritis. But we had no earthly idea he was on illegal drugs, that he had resorted to that to cope with the pain," she says analyzing every step as she tells him each of them, it sounding foolproof to her.

Fitz didn't believe it would work. He didn't think she had thought this all the way through, that she still was in shock, that maybe she even needed some mental help.

"Mel, how sure are you this would work? They could get us on possession since it was in our house, frame us. We would have to be on our toes all the time, watching our backs, covering our tracks-"

"With his past, alcohol poisoning would be expected of him. He's immune to the stuff, it would take way more than we could get him to drink to hurt him. So that's out of the question," she explains.

She leans back into her seat and looks out the window for a brief second, seeing the icy cold, bare trees surround them, then turns back to him.

"Unless you would rather have that blood on _your_ hands, that _weight_ on your shoulders, by stabbing him or shooting him or whatever you plan to do to him, this is the next best thing, Fitz. It would never get traced back to us. We'll even set it up so he has to pick them up himself. Somehow. I'll figure it out," she says in a smart alecky tone, upset that he didn't think her plan was good enough to work.

"_We'll_ figure this out. We just need a little bit of time to think," he reassures her.

_'All I've __**had**__ is time to think for the past six weeks_,' Mellie thought, feeling like Fitz didn't have faith in her. They were both lawyers. They both knew the law and consequences backwards and forwards, had picked it apart and put it back together again. She knew this would work.

Fitz walked into the warm living room and saw Mellie asleep on the brown suede couch that afternoon, covered up with a tan afghan his stepmother had made years ago, specifically for his future family. He loved watching her sleep; she was so peaceful and calm, and especially beautiful. Something about her sleeping made her a thousand times more beautiful to him, and he hated to wake her. It was already 1:30, and he knew she would want to have some time to wake up before they leave. He knelt beside her and placed a hand on his shoulder, rubbing it gently back and forth and kissing her forehead. She began to wake up, having never been in a deep sleep to begin with, but keeps her eyes closed, enjoying his presence.

"Mels... I'm so lucky to have you. You are amazing," he whispered so softly she barely heard him, and she tried to stop the small smile forming on her face. He stroked her hand as he held it and kissed her soft lips, then her forehead again, moving her hair out of her face. She didn't think she was amazing.

She was just her.

A lawyer from Asheville with an interest in politics and security, who just happened to fall in love with a dashing man by the name of Fitzgerald Grant, a senior in her law ethics class at Yale her freshman year, 11 years ago. She loved how he only let her call him by his middle name, Thomas, and how he appreciated and listened to women. His smile, how his dark brown curls lightened in the summer, how gentle and loving he was, how he wanted to start out slow and make sure she was comfortable.

He never pushed the topic of sex on her, and she was grateful. They both knew they needed to be emotionally ready and in the right place and frame of mind. They never got close intimately in the bedroom until six years ago, a year before they got married. She felt it was time and he was happy to talk to her about it. She explained all she wanted was to explore, to love on a deeper level, and thought they could do that by loving each other in a natural state, no clothes, nothing to hide, to just lay there and caress and cherish. No sex; that was to wait until marriage. To her surprise, Fitz agreed to both things. He thought her idea was wonderful, because he also felt they were ready to love on a more intimate level. He also explained that he believed sex was a beautiful thing to be saved for the right person and to create new life, and unashamedly told her he was still a virgin too.

They met each other's parents a few months later, and he asked for their permission to marry her. They both undoubtedly said yes, and they got married nine months later. They had a small ceremony with a few friends and family members in Hot Springs, Arkansas, and went on their honeymoon to Washington, D.C. They lived in Atlanta for a few months before both landing jobs at firms in Dallas, and his campaign for governor began six months later.

Her light gray smoky eyelids opened slowly to reveal her bright blue eyes and a smile on her face. She sits up, keeping the afghan wrapped around herself, and he sits beside her, pitting his arm around her.

"Hey baby," she mumbles sleepily.

"Hey. Did you sleep well?"

"It was wonderful. I hate we can't just nap all day," she smiles.

"I second that," Fitz says, laughing softly, wishing he could just hold her in his arms all day long.

He looks at his watch again and sees her still trying to wake up, and can't help but smile. He knew her depression was coming back and she longed to sleep it off, but she was so cute asleep.

"I'll go get your boots and jacket, and we can stop for hot chocolate on the way there," he says as he gets up and goes towards the stairs.

"Thank you, baby."

He goes upstairs and gets her things while she stands up, straightening her clothes and fixing her hair. She was happy for a few minutes for once, not worried about recent events of hers, and relaxed.

Now she just wanted to know how long she has been pregnant, how much longer she and Fitz had before they got to meet their angel.

They sit in the slightly warmer than outside doctor's office that afternoon, noticing they were less crowded than usual, even for a Saturday. Fitz stared at the wooden floors, his mind still going 100 miles an hour, thinking about Jerry.

Wondering what that night must have been like for both him and Mellie.

The thought literally makes him sick, and he pushes it to the back of his mind. He looks at his hands crossed over his stomach, resting on his gray cotton sweater. His faded dark jeans and tan loafers matched it well, but were not very warm right now. His focus shifts to the nurse at the reception desk, answering the phone, entering insurance information, and setting up new appointments, and to the TV showing the local news.

He wondered how much longer they would be stuck in this boring place. But he also knew this boring place gave him information about their future, their family.

He turned his head to the left and found Mellie asleep, leaning on his shoulder, breathing softly. He smiled, always happy around her, like her presence and beauty took all his problems away. He was so grateful for her.

He was suddenly pulled out of his daze when the nurse opened the door and called their name.

"Mels," he whispered to her softly, waking her up and getting her purse.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep - " She said as he helped her to her feet.

"It's ok."

She locks her arm through his and the nurse holds the door for them patiently with a smile, then leads them to room three. She leaves the chart in the door and shuts it, assuring them Dr. Ryde will be with them shortly.

"Are you nervous?" She asks as she takes off her jacket and hands it her husband.

Fitz stands beside her as she sits on the exam table, her hands shaking with anxiety. He smiles and kisses her forehead, brushing her hair back out of her face.

"Not in the slightest. You?"

"A little bit. I'm just ready to get it over with," she says quietly.

She laughs softly, not able to make words to tell him that this visit determines if there's a chance this child is his father's or not. It would kill her if it was true.

Dr. Ryde walks in, glad to see them on such short notice.

"Thank you for coming back so soon, Mellie. I know you're both anxious and ready to find out about this baby, so let's get to it," Dr. Ryde says, setting her chart on the counter.

She turns on the ultrasound machine and lets it warm up while she washes her hands and gloves up. She gets a bottle of gel out of the cabinet and sets it on the counter.

"I'm going to need you to lay back for me now," she says, noticing the quiet, excited expression on Fitz's face. She knew he was ready to see his baby.

Mellie lies back and Dr. Ryde positions her how she wants her, then pulls up her shirt and grabs the gel.

"I'm sorry, this stuff is a little cold. Just warning you. "

She pours the cool gel on her soft skin, causing her breath to be taken away. It wasn't a new feeling. Her fear did that every second of every day.

"You weren't kidding," Mellie says, exhaling softly with a smile.

Fitz rests his hand on her shoulder and rubs it gently as Dr. Ryde presses the wand on her stomach, spreading the gel out until she gets an image on the screen. Mellie keeps her eyes closed, saying a silent prayer that everything will work out, that this baby will be the best thing that ever happened to them, that her life would be normal again. Fitz kisses her forehead and watches the screen, amazed when he sees the first picture of their baby.

"Mels," he whispers, kissing the top her head, not able to believe that this is really happening.

Mellie opens her eyes and looks at the monitor in disbelief. A baby. Their baby. They were actually having a baby. A little human.

"It looks like you're about... nine weeks along. Farther than expected, but that's not a problem," Dr. Ryde says.

Mellie's heart relaxed for the first time in weeks and a smile formed as tears streamed down her face. She was washed over with relief, now knowing their baby was Fitz's. She could finally breathe again, sleep at night. She saw Fitz glowing with pride and shed a tear as he took her hand.

"I'm going to hold off on giving you the gender for now. I want to wait a few more weeks, just to be sure," she says, looking at their expressions of joy, then back at the screen.

"Of course," Mellie said, then turned to Fitz and whispered so quietly he could barely hear her. She couldn't believe it either. "_Fitz_."

Fitz leans over her and kisses her forehead, the second happiest time of his life, right after the day he married Mellie. Dr. Ryde smiles, knowing they'll want a picture.

"How many copies do you want?"

"Three," Fitz says without hesitation.

Mellie looks up at him questioningly about the third one and he strokes her soft brown hair, still smiling.

"One for home, one for work, and one to send to your mom."

Mellie smiles and nods, closing her eyes, enjoying the sound of their baby's heart beating fill the dull room. She hadn't felt this way in a long time.

It gave her life.

_It gave her reason to live._


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Thank you for reading! I apologize for being slow on updates. Classes have started again and school comes first. I know this chapter is shorter, and I'll work on having chapter 5 up this week.

Disclaimer: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal._

Mellie sits in her office around three Monday afternoon, tapping her thumbs against the oak desk, her mind in a daze. She was supposed to be scheduling volunteer events for the next two weeks, but she was thinking. Her gray wedge boots and dark wash skinny jeans matched her gray and maroon sweater perfectly, she noticed, looking herself once over. She was glad the sweater was a little big and she wouldn't have to worry about anything when she met Fitz for lunch today. Her mind went back to her plan.

How would she get the drugs?

Drugs. That word sounded awful to her.

She had to figure out how to talk Jerry into doing it. She sat at her desk for a few more minutes, then got up, going to his office. She finds him sitting at his desk, working on a paper for a local government conference. She walks in after knocking on the door and stops in front of his desk. He stops typing and turns around, lowering his glasses.

"Do you _need_ something?" Jerry asked with attitude.

Mellie crosses her arms and looks at the mementos on his desk, then back at him.

"I heard there was a big party tonight at The Queen. I was just wondering if you knew anything about it," she asks, pretending to be uninterested.

"I hadn't heard of it. Who's throwing this party?"

"Jones. For his 'elite' friends. There's a list, but I got ahold of a copy. You're on it. I was planning on going, but I don't know. I just want to mingle a little, maybe run into a few old friends. I don't really want to go alone, and I know Fitz is exhausted," she says, trying to convince him to go.

She looks around at his filing cabinets and papers, waiting on an answer. She looks back at him and he turns all the way around, now interested. He stared at her quietly for a few minutes and she was afraid that he had found out she told Fitz.

"What time does it start?" he asks out of curiosity.

"Nine."

"I wouldn't mind catching up with Jones again. I'll go. With you. If...that's ok," he says, unable to look her in the eyes. He realizes he's crossed a fine line and is probably in trouble now. She closes her eyes and sighs quietly, knowing this is for the best.

She got word from a friend that some dealers were going to be there, and one was an old friend of Jerry's.

They needed those drugs.

"You know where we stand," she says looking away, then back at him, her muscles relaxing a little. She hated the idea of going anywhere with him, being alone with him. She was scared. She couldn't lose it now. Not this far in the game.

"I'll go. But if it looks sketchy, we're going low profile, understood? We don't need bad publicity," Mellie reminds him.

"Of course. So is the truck low profile enough?"

"It's fine. I'll be ready by 8:30."

She turns around and walks out with a smile, hoping it all goes as planned. She doesn't really feel up to going, but knows it's necessary. She goes up to their bedroom to work on her education campaign, but falls asleep as soon as she sits down.

* * *

><p>Fitz walks in their bedroom at six after a long day at work and finds Mellie asleep on their down comforter-covered bed. He takes off his jacket and smiles as he loosens his tie and takes off his shoes, then goes over to her. Before he wakes her up, he takes her sleeping, peaceful state in and smiles again, loving how happy she looks like this.<p>

"Mellie," he whispers, stroking her hair softly.

He rubs her arm and she wakes up, wondering what time it is. She's so exhausted, she doesn't even remember falling asleep.

"Fitz? When did you get home? How long have I been asleep?"

She picks up her white alarm clock off the cherry nightstand and it reads 6:12. She sets it down in disbelief and sits up, still trying to fully wake up.

"I just got home. Did you have a good nap?" He asks.

"It was ok, I guess."

She knew she slept hard, but she was too worried about how tonight would go for it to be a restful sleep.

She smiles and flips her hair out of her face, wanting to hug him and hold him close. But she couldn't bring herself to do it. She wasn't ready. Not yet.

Fitz changes into his jeans and Nikes, untucking his shirt, and turning off his phone. He sits beside her on the bed and is glad he's done for the day, that he could leave it all behind at the office.

"What do you want for dinner?" He asks, ready to eat.

"Surprise me. I'll help."

Fitz chuckles softly at her teasing smile and looks into her crystal blue eyes, desiring to kiss her, to show her how much he loved her. He slowly leaned in, closing his eyes, until he remembered. It still hit him like a ton of bricks, like something was physically pushing him back, and he opened his eyes, backing away.

"I'm sorry. It's second nature," he says quietly, knowing he hurt her.

Mellie looks away and tries not to shed any tears, knowing she's ruining their marriage.

"It's ok. I'm sorry too. Let's just go downstairs and start dinner," she says softly.

She gets up and puts her fuzzy boots on, and he follows her as they start towards the kitchen.

"Sounds like a plan."

Mellie walks to the fridge and gets him out a beer, opening it and handing it to him. He hesitantly takes it, knowing she's stressed too and wishing she could have a few drinks herself.

"Thanks baby," he says.

He opens the fridge and sees what they already have thawed out. He pulls out some ground beef and keeps digging, searching for some vegetables. Mellie waits patiently for some instructions, curious as to what he'll make.

"Can you get some water boiling please?"

"Big pot or little pot?" She asks, going through the cabinets and picking through the pots.

"Eh, big pot is fine," he says, drinking his cold beer.

She pulls a stainless steel medium sized pot out of the cabinet and fills it with water, putting it on the stove. He shuts the fridge and she sees all types of vegetables lying on the counter, which makes her even more curious.

"Once that gets boiling, you can put some potatoes in," he says.

He rinses all the vegetables off and opens the meat, emptying it into a bowl and beginning to mix up his masterpiece.

Mellie sits on the island countertop, watching him intently as he takes a drink of his beer, then continues stirring.

"So..." Mellie says quietly, trying to figure out how to tell her husband she was going to go out with her attacker.

"...So?"

Mellie gets down and moves the vegetables out of the way, then sits on the counter beside him, needing to get closer to talk. She never knew where Jerry might be.

"Me and Jer are going to The Queen tonight. Jones is having a party. For his elite friends. Word is Jer's old dealer is going to be there."

Fitz stops stirring and looks at her in disbelief. He almost loses his grip on the spoon as his heart skips a beat and a lump forms in his throat.

Austin. How could he ever forget Austin?

"_Austin?" _Fitz whispers in shock.

"Yeah. I'm hoping-"

"That he'll buy the drugs on his own and you won't have to provoke him."

"Exactly," Mellie agrees, knowing he knew her idea from the second she opened her mouth.

Fitz nods and keeps stirring, shocked that she's going there alone with him. He wonder what he needs to send with her, pepper spray or a gun, since he knows Jerry won't look out for her. He decides he'll go with her, even if going out on a Monday is the last thing he wants to do.

"I'll come with you," Fitz says sternly.

"Fitz, I know you're tired, and I don't want to make a big scene out of this. Not that I'm saying you would. I just...I think if you go, he might get suspicious. I don't like the idea of going alone with him either, but I don't think he'll try anything," she tries to explain.

Fitz was hurt. His own wife telling him he shouldn't go. But he knew she was just watching out for him and their plan. He kept adding ingredients, then stirred it all up one last time before emptying it into a pan and putting it into the oven. He put potatoes in the boiling water and put the lid on it, then turns back to her.

"Could I send someone else with you?" He asks curiously.

"There's a list."

She pulls it up on her phone and hands it to him as he finishes his beer. He finds a name on the list and sets the bottle down.

"Tyler. Let me give him a call," Fitz says, pulling out his phone before Mellie can even speak and calls his old friend.

"Hello?" Tyler answers in his usual loud, deep, slightly cheerful tone.

"Tyler, hey man. It's Fitz Grant. Listen, I was just wondering if you were going to the party at The Queen tonight."

"Hey, how's it going, man? Long time no see. Yeah, I'm about to head out soon. You going?"

"I'm not going to be able to make it, but Mels is," Fitz says, looking over at Mellie checking the potatoes.

"I was really hoping to catch up, but I'll just get all the info from Mellie," Tyler jokes.

He laughs and Fitz chuckles softly, walking around the kitchen, watching Mellie turn the potatoes off and drain them. She leaves the peels on, just how he likes them, and gets the other ingredients to make mashed potatoes.

"Look man, I know she can hold her own and all, no doubt in my mind...but would you mind keeping an eye out for her tonight? She just wants to see some old friends, and I just don't like the idea of her alone at a club. I-" Tyler cuts him off quickly.

"Of course, no problem, Fitz. Don't sweat it. She'll be fine. But me and you gotta catch up over lunch or golf or something soon."

"Will do. Thanks again, Ty. I owe you one," Fitz sighs with relief.

"No big deal. Bye man."

They both hang up and Fitz feels much better letting her go now, knowing she'll be protected. He walks back over to her and wraps his arms around her slim waist, kissing her cheek as she mashes the potatoes.

"So do I know Tyler?" She asks, wondering who this guy is.

"I'm pretty sure you've met before. He was two years ahead of me in law school. He works for that big production company in town now. He's a real good guy," Fitz adds.

Fitz sets his phone down on the island counter and leans over it, closing his eyes, feeling a throbbing, dull pain in his right shoulder. His right foot, he felt it for once. It was the first phantom sensation he had felt in years, ever since-

'_They ended my life,_' he thought. _'My entire career. And now I'm here.'_

He stopped thinking for a moment; his mind went blank, erased completely for a few seconds. His breathing was a shallow as he gripped the counter tightly, his entire body tense. Now all he could remember was that frigid, unexpected night.

Mellie walks away from the stove and approaches him slowly, knowing what's happening. She rests her hand on his shoulder and he grunts softly, still remembering his past. Now all he could remember was lying in a hospital bed after his operation, and his foot was gone.

She didn't hear from him for three and a half years, not until after she had graduated. It was like he vanished. Disappeared. Fell off the face of the earth.

He shows back up, asks her out again, and everything worked out. He never told her about his foot, that night, what they had done to him, until six years ago, their first night together. She remembered it like it was yesterday.

The feeling of ten knives entering his foot caused him to cry out, holding the counter for support, almost in tears, ready to kill. It was his instinct. It was his job.

_'I get one last chance.'_

Mellie rubs his shoulders and he slowly gets up, turning around and sitting on the island, taking his shoe off. He rolls up his pants leg and takes off his prosthetic foot, something no one outside of the family knew about, and he intended to keep it this way. He massaged his ankle gently, noticing it was swollen as he sighed. She got on the counter and sat behind him, stretching her legs around his hips, and massaging his neck slowly. He began to relax and calm down, despite his blood still boiling.

He wanted to watch him die.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thank you for reading and all of your reviews. I love seeing your thoughts and where you think the story will go. Hope everyone enjoyed last night's episode.

Disclaimer: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal._

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><p>"You have it, right?"<p>

Fitz asked for the third time as he watched her get ready to go to The Queen with Jerry, putting on one her sexiest outfits; well, it was in his opinion. She was dressed in a gray tank top that hugged her body perfectly, covered by a jet-black leather jacket. Her black washed skinny jeans turned him on every time she wore them, and were accented perfectly with her shining boots. She had curled her hair and did her makeup perfectly-it was called a smoky eye, if he remembered correctly-and he was trying not to drool and keep it in his pants. She didn't even look like the normal Mellie he knew. He rarely ever saw this Mellie, and no one else ever did. She leaned over the counter as she looked in the mirror to put on her lipstick and quickly put it away, looking back at him, a little annoyed.

"It's right here," she rolls her eyes, officially annoyed.

She picks up a syringe full of M99 off the counter and shoves it in her boot, knowing to use it if she needed it. Fitz had told her not to worry about anything. If Jerry got too close and she had to use it, he would make sure his best guy handled the case.

"Just making sure. Call me if you need me. Tyler will be there too. Be safe, Mels."

He hugged her loosely, making sure not to get too close, but just close enough. She hugged him back, feeling safe again with him, knowing she was about to throw all that out the window by going with Jerry for the night.

He follows her downstairs and into the living room, seeing Jerry waiting for her by the door, dressed in his usual khakis and pastel button down with the sleeves rolled up. He tried to keep his cool when he saw her coming down the stairs; she was gorgeous.

"You ready, Mellie?" Jerry asks.

"Of course," she says, without any emotion.

He caught a glimpse of Fitz shooting him the most gruesome look out of the corner of his eye, a look that said it all. Fitz kept his hand on Mellie's waist until they made it to his truck. Mellie had told him they were taking it to stay low key, and he agreed it was best. He shut the door behind her and told them to have a good time, watching them drive off and down the road.

Jerry knew Fitz wasn't going down without a fight now. He stayed calm as he drove down the road, acting normal, turning on the radio. Neither of them said much to the other, both tense.

He could kill her tonight, then easily get Fitz out of his way.

'_If she had just kept her damn mouth shut, I wouldn't be having to deal with Fitz now,'_ he thought.

He sped up a little, making her slightly nervous. He wanted to end her life right now, unknowingly as much as she wanted to end his, but he knew he couldn't. He could. But it would require cleaning up quietly or ending his too.

So he couldn't.

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><p>They pull up in front of The Queen after saying nothing to each other the whole way there, seeing a few people file in and hanging around outside as the deafening music coming from inside shook the entire building and sidewalk. Jerry pulled into the parking lot and parked under a streetlight, then got out and came and opened her door for her, surprising her. They start towards the dimly lit side door, one of two entrances, and see a bouncer checking IDs.<p>

"You excited?" Jerry asks as he gets his wallet out to get his license.

"A little. You?"

"Definitely hoping to see a few old friends tonight," he says, hopeful.

She smiles at the bouncer and reaches into her clutch for her ID, but he waves her on through with a flirty wink. He looked at her ass as she walked inside, and then quickly snatched Jerry's ID out of his hand, looking at it, back at him, and back at the ID before shoving it against his chest, waiting for someone to show up. The night was still young and the party was just getting started.

Mellie saw him as soon as she walked in; Austin was sitting right there in the corner, smoking some weed, talking to a few classy people surrounding him. She looked around the room as she approached the bar, sitting on a barstool, taking it all in. She hadn't been here in years, and not much had changed. The DJ was still set up on a small stage at the front of the room, but had a much better light show and sound system. He was blaring the latest obnoxious rap, and few oldies since it was an older audience at this party. The speakers shook the floor and she could feel the bass thumping in her chest. There were round tables and booths all along the walls, filled with rich people smoking the best weed and drinking the best liquor their money could buy. Austin and his two dealers looked like they were regulars and stayed low, trying not to get busted. She noticed Jerry went straight to the other end of the bar and began talking to old friends, but he noticed Austin across the room.

She watched the bartender mix up some drinks and sighed, crossing her arms and leaning against the bar, wishing desperately she could drink and smoke right now. That's all she wanted; a few drinks and a good blunt. She and Fitz hadn't smoked together in years; last time was at a graduation party for one of their classmates. She could get loose and have a good time if she could smoke a little, have some whiskey. Tyler walked up from behind and sat beside her, interrupting her thoughts when he spoke to her.

"So what would you like to drink?" Tyler says in his usual sultry, gentlemanly voice.

He pulls out his wallet and waits for the bartender to get finished, and she turns her head slightly to look at him. She holds up her left hand and waves her wedding ring around.

"Nice try, but I'm married," Mellie says, not able to believe she hasn't even been here five minutes and some sleazy guy is already hitting on her.

"I'm not trying to jump into bed with you, I was just offering to buy you a drink," he says standoffish, now a little offended.

She looked closer at him and turned to face him, almost not believing it was Tyler. It had been years since they had seen each other, but his looks had changed immensely.

"_Tyler?" _

Tyler instantly began to blush, feeling awful that he didn't recognize Mellie at first. He tried to think of how to apologize, but just stumbled over his words.

"Mellie? I- I didn't... look, I am so sorry. I did not recognize you at all. You look amazing, by the way. I like this adventurous look on you," he smiles softly.

"It's fine, Ty. And thanks. Trying to stay low profile. It took me a minute to realize it was you, too. Your looks have changed a lot since we last saw each other. How are you?" She asks, relief finally coming to her, thankful it was just him and not actually some asshole.

"Good. Just trying to make some money, keep a steady income. You?"

"Exhausted, because you know being First Lady of Texas is so hard," she laughs softly and he chuckles, remembering he had always enjoyed her sense of humor.

"It's a lot of paperwork and keeping up with Fitz and trying to help the people, but I wouldn't trade it for anything."

He waves at the bartender and gets a nod back as he pours the drink, getting ready to come to them.

"So what would you like to drink?" He asks her again, hoping for a better response this time.

Mellie shakes her head and smiles gently, waving a hand.

"No alcohol for me. Fitz didn't tell you we're expecting?" She whispers, leaning over as she rests an elbow on the bar.

"He didn't even mention it. Congratulations. Y'all will be amazing parents. I -"

His voice faded out of her mind as she caught a glimpse of Jerry, having already downed two drinks, walking over to Austin's corner. The music was so loud she could no longer think; her head was pounding, and all she wanted was to smoke. She saw a couple in the opposite corner getting hot and bothered, making out and touching, caressing, practically eating each other's faces. She let out a long sigh, wanting to feel like that with Fitz again. She just needed to feel something. Jerry had killed everything inside her.

He sat down by Austin, them shaking hands, glad to see each other. She watched them for a few minutes, wondering what they were saying. She remembered he was a CEO of some locally based company and he got mixed in with the wrong crowd about fifteen years back and made a huge profit from being a dealer.

Jerry sat down beside Austin and pulled a pack of cigarettes and a lighter out of his pocket. He lit a cigarette and finished his shot of tequila he had ordered, glad to see Austin. He hadn't seen him in a few years and needed to discuss getting a refill on his 'prescription'. He looks a little older than he remembered him a few years ago, but Jerry figured it was because of all the drugs.

"Long time no see, Jer. How you been man?" Austin asks, moving over a little to make more room for him. He finishes his glass of straight vodka and takes another hit off his joint, putting his arm around the tiny, barely dressed twenty-something girl beside him.

"Good. Just trying to stay out of trouble. You?" Jerry finishes his cigarette, wishing he had some Cuban cigars instead.

The both chuckle softly and Austin nods at a man across the room, obviously a regular he dealt with. Jerry looked around, making sure the owner wasn't watching them. He didn't need to go to jail tonight. He was trying to be low key.

"Same as usual, just trying to make a name for myself out here," Austin sighs.

A waitress comes up and Austin orders an entire bottle of Crown Royal, while Jerry orders a beer and two shots of bourbon. He was feeling awfully adventurous tonight, and nothing was going to stop him.

"I understand."

The waitress returns moments later with their drinks and Jerry hands her some money, ready to get down to business with Austin. He takes a drink of his beer while Austin lights another joint and takes a drink of his Crown Royal before handing it off to his lady friend. He looks around subtly, making sure they didn't look too suspicious, and began really talking.

He noticed there were other people around doing "business transactions" nearby, and he wasn't too worried about it. However, Jerry was surprised how openly it was going on here, until he saw Austin reach into his pocket and pull out two packs of cigarettes. He sets them both on his thigh and looks across the room as he finishes his smoke, then looks at Jerry.

"They know it goes on. It's no big deal," Austin reassures him.

They sit in silence for a few moments, then he leans back comfortably, whispering to his friend, making sure he remembered his order from last time - Valium and Oxycodone.

"Two kickers and a Blue Vs?"

"Yeah," Jerry says under his breath.

"So you mentioned some serious headaches and joint pain? Doctors won't give you any more, huh?"

"They cut me off a while ago. Can't find anyone around here to write me a scrip for it. Nothing else works," he sighs, rubbing his neck, not sure why he was trying to make this believable.

Jerry was lying straight through his teeth; he had become addicted to both and needed them desperately. He had tried to last the past few weeks without them, but he realized he couldn't. He also knew Austin didn't care one way or the other why he wanted the drugs; he just needed the money.

"I understand. I've been in your shoes, I feel your pain," he says, the quiet girl beside him rubbing his inner thigh as he talks with Jerry.

Austin opens the boxes and makes sure the medicine is there, then closes them back up.

"You got some ID?" Austin asks as standard protocol.

Jerry gets out his wallet and shows him his driver's license, noticing a girl from another couch nearby watching them. Austin looked in the boxes once more and closed them, taking another drink of his whiskey.

"It'll be $600."

Jerry can't believe it, but pulls out the money, having a feeling he would want cash instead of wiring it to him. He didn't care. He needed this. Austin gives him the boxes and puts the money in his pocket, putting out his cigarettes.

"Thanks, man. Really helped me out," Jerry sighs thankfully.

"Anytime. You know where I'm at if you need something. Catch you later."

They shake hands and Jerry goes back to the bar. He orders a few shots of vodka and watches the people dancing near the DJ.

Mellie came back to reality once he sat down at the other end of the bar.

She had just watched him buy illegal drugs.

_Illegal._

As in against the law.

As in _jail time._

"Two virgin martinis and a Heineken," the bartender says as he sets the drinks down in front of them and Mellie realizes she never noticed he ordered them some drinks. He gives the bartender his card and opens a tab for the two of them, happy to pay for anything of hers. Tyler takes a drink of his tap Heineken and sighs satisfactorily, watching her reluctantly pick up a martini.

"Thanks, Ty. Sorry I zoned out earlier," Mellie says with an exhausted sigh. She was disgusted with Jerry.

She sips her drink slowly, wishing it was bourbon, but will take whatever she can get at this point. Just having something to do, something to get her mind away from everything was amazing. She felt happy talking to Tyler, even if he was just Fitz's friend. He was someone different, not tied to Jerry, someone new.

"No problem. So what are you two hoping for?" Tyler asks, still holding on to his beer, glancing at the small TV in the corner of the bar on ESPN.

"I'm down for either," Mellie says with shrugged shoulders. She finishes her first martini and sets the glass down, wiping the edges of her deep pink-stained lips. She smiles a little as she sees Tyler intently watching and grinning.

"What?" She asks, confused.

"It's nothing. I'm just not used to seeing you like this. So ... comfortable. So relaxed, not worried about being... who you are, about looking the part. This is the real Mellie that Fitz married, that's all. I like her," Tyler smiles, glad she's not worried right now.

Mellie laughs softly and looks away, then back at him, picking up her other martini. She needed something else. Something to make her feel good.

"She doesn't get to come out much. But I like her too," Mellie smiles a little.

"You want something else?" He offers, surprising her. She knew he was a good friend and one of Fitz's, and that he would take care of her.

"Surprise me."

She kept an eye on Jerry as Tyler ordered some more drinks, wishing she could catch him in something else. More drugs, some prostitutes, a shady business deal, it didn't matter. Anything to hold over him.

Her ankle began to itch and as she leaned down to scratch it, she was startled by the cold metal that met her fingers.

'_Fuck_,' she thought, closing her eyes.

She looked down and thought the pocket knife in her left boot was pretty noticeable compared to the syringe in her right. She hated carrying around weapons. She wasn't afraid to use them, but afraid of being caught and not being able to get out of it. Not even the fact that she came from a ring of lawyers gave her any kind of security.

"Mellie?" A woman called out, and she immediately knew whose voice it was.

Mellie turned around and saw Danielle, her old friend from undergrad coming from the bathroom with another tall, preppy looking woman behind her. Both of their heels clicking against the concreted floor as they approached her, both of them wearing expensive outfits and jewelry. Mellie knew the ring on her finger and the fact she was married to Fitz in itself was enough to get her in with these people, and enough to scare them.

"Dani, how's it going?" Mellie asks with a fake smile on her face.

She got down from her seat and met her halfway, her boots clacking, walking straight into a fake hug. Tyler watched slyly, looking down at his watch, seeing it was only 10. He desperately wanted to dance with Mellie. He remembered every party he had ever been to with her and Fitz; she always stole the show. She was an amazing dancer, but he knew he couldn't be seen with her and possibly end up in the tabloids tomorrow.

"Great, how are you? Didn't expect to see you here..._alone_. Where's Fitz?" Dani asks, wanting to put on a good face and still get some gossip.

Mellie wasn't surprised she remembered about Fitz, because she knew this girl didn't watch the news of any sort unless it pertained to her favorite reality stars. They had kept up for a little while when she was in law school and she got to know Fitz. She had even started calling her Mellie Grant back then, swearing she knew they would get married.

"He's at home, been busy all week. Up to his neck in bills to be passed. Jer's here, though," she sighs.

She shrugs in his direction and Dani stretches her neck to see him talking to Jones at the bar, both laughing and drinking a beer.

"Some things never change. Anyway, you want to come sit at our table? Unless you would rather sit at the bar alone," Dani sighs, hoping she will and catch up with her.

Mellie looks back at Tyler and he gives her a little nod, letting her know it was ok to go with them.

"Sure."

She follows them to their table against the opposite wall across the room, not noticing anyone with them.

_'Where are all the people I'm supposed to know?_' She thought.

Then it hit her.

_What if?_

What if this was a junkie party? She could see a lot of these people as addicts. All jittery yet calm at the same time, eager to get into something. What if Jerry knew that from the minute he saw the invitation? What if he was getting the drugs to kill her?

'_This can't backfire on me now, not this close to winning,_' she thought.

She sat down with them for a few minutes, listening to Dani's friends' drunken conversations, yet still thinking.

She fought the urge to pull out her phone and call Fitz. He could save her.

But he couldn't protect her last time, and that took away all future faith in his protection, despite the fact it was not his fault. He could still come get her.

"You ok, Mels?"

Mellie came out of her daze, realizing she had blocked out the pounding music for a few seconds as the thumping flowed through her body. She looked down at her phone - it was only 10:15, and she was already ready to leave. She couldn't be seen here anymore.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Mellie says quietly.

"You just looked a little worried about something. Here," Dani says as she takes a half-smoked joint from one of her male friends and hands it to Mellie, who quickly denies it.

"No thanks. Not tonight," Mellie politely declines the offer.

"13 years, Mel. Come on. Just once."

"I put that down years ago, Dani. Swore I wouldn't do it again," she says, refusing it again.

'_I'm going to hell,_' Mellie thought.

She lied in a heartbeat to Dani. She didn't care. Of course she wanted to smoke; she was surrounded by some of the best weed money could buy. She and Fitz had only smoked a handful of times since knowing each other, but when they had reason to celebrate, they wouldn't hesitate to light up.

Besides, she was focused on getting out of there. As more mysterious looking people filed in with money and drugs, she was sure guns were right behind it. And that was one thing she didn't have on her. She wasn't going to risk it.

As she blocked Dani's annoying voice out again subconsciously, her eyes were fixed on Jerry again, now talking to a younger woman. He whispered in her ear and she giggled, patting his leg covered in Italian pants, loving, or at least pretending to love, every single word that came out of his disgusting mouth. He would smile and take another drink, whispering to her again, putting his arm around her, getting dangerously close. A few minutes later, the drunken conversation stopped and his wallet came out.

Everything got quiet for her. The deafening club music stopped. The mixing of drinks at the bar was silent. The nearby dialogue was mute. Her heart skipped a beat.

She knew exactly what he was doing.

And she was going to be sick.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:** I really didn't want to wait to upload this chapter. Thanks for reading, feel free to leave reviews or message me with any questions!

Disclaimer: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal._

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><p>She couldn't handle watching this. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, getting out her own wallet. She pulled out $50, $30 of it being for this poor girl's troubles for the night, and walked over to them, handing it to the young, frisky girl.<p>

"He's way too drunk to drive, get a cab," Mellie says to the girl, disgusted by Jerry.

"Who are you?" The prissy girl says with attitude as she keeps close to Jerry and plays with her hair.

"Mellie, I can drive-" Jerry stops, unable to get the rest of the sentence out.

The words got caught in her throat. She almost lost it, but knew she had to keep it together.

"His daughter-in-law," Mellie says confidently, "Jerry, I'm taking the truck home."

"Damn it Mellie, you aren't going anywhere without me-" He raises his voice and tries to grab her, but she quickly steps back.

She looked at the curious young girl and apologized, wishing she could protect her too.

"I'm so, so sorry," she whispers.

She walks away, Jerry still slurring obscenities at her as she meets Tyler at the bar, her heart heavy. She hated that man with every fiber of her being.

"Hey, how were your friends?" Tyler asks curiously, focusing on her now instead of the TV.

"Tyler, I have to go. I can't stay any longer. Jerry is over there buying that girl and there is just too much going on here that I don't want to be a part of. I have the spare keys to the truck, I'm about to call Fitz and tell him I'm leaving," Mellie says shakily, the shock of Jerry buying prostitutes hitting her hard. The thought was one thing. The sight was another.

"Ok. Let me close my tab and I'll follow you out," he says without a flinch.

He gets the bartender's attention and hands him his card, watching him walk to the computer.

Mellie couldn't believe it. How ready, how willingly Tyler was to just leave when she needed to, to be with her and watch out for her. She knew Fitz had good friends, but not that they were so much like him.

The bartender comes back with his card and he shoves it in his wallet and follows her out the back door, pushing through the crowd still trying to get in. He walked behind her so no one could attack from behind as she dug through her purse and got the spare keys out, unlocking the silver beast of a truck. Tyler climbed in the passenger side as she got in the driver's side and locked the doors, pulling out her phone and calling Fitz.

Fitz was sitting in his office at 10:45 that night in his favorite gray t-shirt and jeans, wearing his thin-rimmed glasses, going over bills. He sighed heavily as he signed the 43rd paper of the night, which was another no, bringing the total to 8 yes's and 35 no's. Being governor was the hardest thing he had ever done in his life.

His heavy eyes closed slowly, the dim lights not helping the situation. He couldn't fight sleep any longer. He leaned back and nodded off, only to jump out of his chair when his cell phone rang. He became fully awake as he fished his phone out of his deep jeans pocket, wondering who was calling him this late at night, unless it was-

"Mellie?" Fitz answered the phone hurriedly, still half asleep.

She sighed when he answered after waiting through six rings, and could hear the fear in his voice. All she could do was answer shakily. Her entire body was now trembling, her breathing shallow and uneven, feeling anxious.

"Hey. Um...I'm about to leave The Queen. Tyler said he was going to follow me home, I'm driving the truck. I'm going...out to the house, but I'm stopping at the mansion first," she says, her voice trembling, her body shaking.

Fitz could hear the distress in her voice and wondered what was wrong. He got up and put his shoes on, figuring he better be ready to go with her to the house when she got here.

"Are you ok? Why are you driving? Where's Jerry?" He asks sternly, worried about her. She never got easily upset.

"I'm...I'm safe. He's- he's in there... buying a prostitute. And drugs. He's drunk and probably on something. I gave the girl $50 and left, but I don't know if she knew what to do with it."

He knew then that they were going to the house because she couldn't stand to even be in the same house as him and a prostitute. It would kill them both to even think about it. He needed to make sure his father was taken care of.

"What kind of drugs were there, Mel? Did you see anything specific?" Fitz asks, standing up, hoping he can catch Jerry in the act.

Fitz was now concerned that his wife ever even went to this B-grade trashy club. He didn't like the idea of her being around all that, even if he had been with her. He was more concerned about busting Jerry before he hurt that girl. He gathered his papers and turned off his office light as he continued to listen to her as he walked upstairs. He grabbed his small duffel bag off the top shelf of their closet, throwing a few shirts of his and hers in it, along with some pants, and their toothbrushes. He knew they still had some stuff at the old house, but wasn't sure how much they had left there.

"Everything you can imagine, there were dealers from all over this end of Texas there. Jerry took two packs of cigarettes from Austin. Everyone is drunk, there's probably guns floating around too. Look, we need to go before he comes out here and tries to pick a fight-" He cuts her off.

"Just come on home. I'll be waiting," he says, then pauses. "I love you."

"Love you too," she whispers.

They hang up and Tyler reaches into his pocket before getting out of the truck. He pulls out a cheap burner phone and hands it to Mellie, giving her concise instructions.

"Wait until you get back on the highway, then call the police. All you tell them about is the drugs at The Queen and throw it out the window. No name, no address, nothing. They'll get it. I'll be right behind you," Tyler reassures her.

She nods quietly, calming down a little, just ready to get away from here and back to Fitz. She looked out the window, her mind filled with memories of that night, that night Jerry took advantage of her, her blood boiling, ready to kill.

"You ok, Mellie?" He asks, noticing she seemed out of it.

"Huh? Yeah. I'm...great."

"You ready to go?"

"Yeah," she says, ready to be home. Two gunshots go off nearby, breaking the silence in the air, and she immediately looks at Tyler in fear. He looks into her eyes and she knows it'll be ok.

"You lead, I'll follow," he demands, opening the door.

He gets out swiftly and she locks the doors, closing her eyes. She lets out a deep sigh, gripping the steering wheel tightly, wondering why she ever agreed to come here. She knew Jerry was going to get into something like this. She knew better than to tag along, no matter how badly they needed those drugs.

She heard the engine of Tyler's black Camaro turn over and she pulled out of the parking lot, headed back down the highway to get on the freeway and go home. She constantly checked her mirror to make sure he was right behind her, which he was. She leaned back, trying to relax, trying to get her mind off Jerry and that girl. She got up to 72 when she got on the freeway and put it on cruise, then picked up the burner phone. She hesitantly dialed 911, taking a deep breath, thinking of what to say. It rang twice before dispatch picked up.

"911, what's your emergency?" A dispatcher answers quickly.

Mellie froze, not knowing what to say, now in a panic.

"Hello? 911, what's your emergency?" The woman says, not having any time for games.

"149 Beech Street, The Queen. There's a lot of illegal activity right now. Mostly drugs," Mellie blurts out and sighs.

"What's your locat-"

Mellie hung up and rolled down the window, the cold air hitting her in the face. She threw the phone out as far as she could, hoping Jerry would get busted.

Tyler smiled as he saw the phone fly past his car and smash into the pavement. He turned up his radio and leaned back, glad they were out.

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><p>Jerry sat in the corner with his prostitute, whispering sweet nothings in her ear, ready to take her home. He finished off his last drink and put his arm around her waist, pulling her closer into him.<p>

"Why don't we head on out?" Jerry whispers in the young girl's ear, pulling her closer into him.

The girl whose name he had yet to learn smiled and kissed his neck softly, letting him know she was willing to do whatever he wanted. He stood up and looked for his keys, wondering where he put them, when they were right there in his pocket.

"Where the –"

"Why don't we just take a cab back?" She says seductively, not wanting him to get upset and potentially end the deal.

Jerry smiles as she takes his hand and leads him out the back door, the muffled music still audible from the edge of the sidewalk, even above the zooming of speeding cars along the road. He held on to her, making sure she wouldn't get away. She was surprised how well he was handling the amount of alcohol he had consumed, which practically proved she had no idea of who he was. By this point, she was sure he was exhaling straight alcohol, not carbon dioxide and oxygen.

After five whole minutes of being ignored by cab drivers, she finally got one. It was a ragged old car with chipped paint and a dented front bumper, but they didn't care. He wanted to get laid and she wanted to get paid, so it didn't matter to them how they got there. As soon as he opened the backseat door, they heard police sirens get louder and louder and saw three patrol cars pull up at The Queen, barely getting parked before going inside.

"Get in," he demanded, knowing they were putting the place on lockdown when he saw three more cars pull up and block the back and side doors. He slid in quickly behind her and slammed the door shut, telling the middle-aged driver with a nicely trimmed beard to hustle to the house. She looked back with relief, glad they had gotten out of there before they got busted.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:** Just a heads up, Fitz and Mellie really begin their struggle through all of this in this chapter. The stress of handling Jerry and the rape is really starting to get to them.

Thank you for reading. Feel free to leave a review with any of your thoughts!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal._

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><p>Mellie whipped it around the driveway as they pulled up at the Governor's Mansion at 11:17, seeing Fitz waiting at the door with his work bag and a small duffel bag packed, ready to go with her. He was still wearing his glasses, which she loved, his black, large leather jacket, and had on his gray sheepskin slippers.<p>

She laughed softly as she saw in her rearview mirror him walking back Tyler's car to speak to him. He loved those shoes and refused to admit it to her or anyone else. She had bought them for him three years ago and he wore them in the winter when he wanted to be lazy or get comfortable. He always, always denied liking them and swore he wore them just because Mellie had gotten them for him.

Fitz walks up to the driver's side blacked out window of Tyler's Camaro and he rolls it down, ready to shake Tyler's hand.

"Ty, thank you so much. I can't even begin to thank you enough, man. I owe you big time. Thank you for following her home," Fitz says, knowing he owes him lunch for this. It meant so much to him for Tyler to watch out for her.

"Of course, G. It's no big deal. I'd do anything for you. Holler at you later, man. Take care," Tyler says, waving bye to Mellie, causing her to smile.

"You too."

Tyler rolled up the window and sped down the driveway and past the guard, then back out onto the street to go home. Fitz threw his bags in the backseat of the truck and jumped in the passenger side beside his wife, ready to go.

"How are you?" He asks, still concerned.

"Better now," she says quietly.

She put it in drive and stepped on it, needing to get away before Jerry got back with that girl. She drove quickly to their house, making it there in half the time it usually took. Fitz could tell she was sad but also angry in the way she drove, and he wanted to make her feel better.

He just wanted her back, even though he never would get it.

* * *

><p>"Fitz," Mellie said in a nagging tone with her arms crossed.<p>

Fitz continued pacing around his office in their former home, still going through his stack of bills. This house was much smaller than the Governor's Mansion, but it was home to them. It was a brick, two-story house, twenty-one hundred square feet, 4 bedrooms, 3 baths, a living room, a huge kitchen and dining room, two offices, another room Fitz called his man-cave, and the basement. There was a hot tub in the backyard and a nice patio with lounge chairs. They were surrounded by trees, miles away from anyone in either direction, simply secluded in their own little country house. Mellie loved it and never wanted to leave, but Jerry insisted they come to the Governor's Mansion when Fitz was elected. Fitz almost wasn't elected because of him. The people thought a paternal succession to the seat was a plan of Jerry's to keep power. Little did they know, it was nothing close. Fitz barely won by 53 votes.

"_Fitz." _

_S_he says his name sternly, raising her voice after realizing he was not listening.

Fitz quit pacing and looked up to see his beautiful wife standing in the doorway, still wearing her black jeans and gray tank top, but now wearing her fuzzy boots he threw in the bag earlier. He sighed deeply and took his glasses off, setting them and the papers down on his desk.

"I'm sorry," he sighs heavily, just ready to get done with these bills.

"It's one in the morning. You need to sleep," she reminded him quietly.

"So do you. God, Mels," he whispered, briefly closing his eyes, admiring both her beauty and her strength. He couldn't believe how blessed he was.

He turned back around, clearly distressed, running his fingers through his hair. The tone of his voice reminded her of exactly how Jerry spoke to her that night, and her heart skipped a beat again. She closed her eyes, unable to get his face out of her mind, what he could be doing to that poor girl.

Fitz turned towards her again and saw she was clearly in another world, but all he could see was her beauty. He walked closer to her and figured out what was happening.

"Mellie," he whispers gently, moving his body closer to hers.

She opened her eyes as his hands met her arms, and she exhaled sharply. His touch was almost too much. It felt horrible, but so good. His arms took her in, held her close, his hands stroked her back. It took her breath away, and she wondered how much of what she was feeling was real or just a nightmare triggered by her PTSD.

"_You_ ..._ are so_ ... _beautiful_," he says, feeling like the luckiest guy in the world.

He tilted her head upwards to look into her eyes, but all he saw was sorrow. Hurt. Anger. A woman broken into a million little pieces.

It was his job to piece her back together.

She put her arms around him and let her body sink into his, no longer feeling anything except tension and numbness, both at the same time. She kept her face buried in his broad chest, wanting to hide forever.

"Let's go sit by the fireplace," he suggests.

He picks her up and she wraps her slender legs around his waist as he carries her to the living room, setting her down on the small pallet he made out of blankets and cushions when they got there. She snuggles up beside him as he lies down, enjoying her presence, glad to be away from his father for a while.

He didn't care if they didn't go to work tomorrow. He didn't care because he knew he had to take care of business first. His own wife was raped and living in the same house as her rapist, no less, was pregnant, and was the First Lady of Texas. His father was an addict and a whore. Fitz wanted to kill him with his bare hands so badly. But he was the governor, trying to run a state, keep things under wraps, and somewhat hold his family together.

He knew he wasn't perfect and it would be hard, but he knew he had to do it.

It would be worth it.

* * *

><p>Fitz woke up around four that morning, unable to sleep for worrying about the bills and Mellie. The crackling of the fire and the soft glow that filled the room calmed him a little as he got up, careful not to disturb her, and went to make coffee. He stood sleepily by the coffee pot, listening to it brew slowly, wishing he could sleep.<p>

All he wanted was a few more hours to rest.

He sipped on his fresh coffee as he sat back down beside Mellie, who seemed to be in the most comfortable, peaceful sleep she had had in a long time. He loved seeing her happy. All he could think was _kill._

To kill his father.

To kill the monster that ruined her life.

To kill the man who had hurt too many people.

His ankle began to bother him again as he sat beside her, stroking her soft brown curls. He set his coffee down and took off his prosthetic foot, setting it on the couch and rubbing his ankle. The nerves hurt like hell and the skin was tender to touch. He rubbed it anyway, one pain canceling out the other. It felt good to him, in a strange way. The agonizing pain actually made him feel numb.

He almost liked it.

He stretched it out, lying back down beside her, trying to relax. He closed his eyes as his mind was filled with the thoughts of work, trying to figure out how to handle it all. He was thinking about the next bill when he heard Mellie mumbling loudly and was obviously stressed.

He left her be for a moment, seeing if she was going to calm down first or if he was going to have to wake her up. After he was fully awakened by her screams, he knew he had to wake her up. He couldn't let her continue living this nightmare over and over. He put one hand on her arm as the other stroked her face, trying to get her to wake up. Her body felt tense and cooler than normal, despite her anger.

"Mellie, wake up. Listen to me, Mels. Wake up, baby-"

Fitz shook his wife's arm gently, trying to get her to wake up from her nightmare. Her body was shaking as she tossed and turned, her whimpers and cries, her shallow breathing said it all. He knew what was happening.

She was dreaming about that night.

He hated even thinking of it, seeing his father, even hearing his name made him want to get ahold of him.

"No, I swear, don't do this- don't! Stop! Fitz! _Fitz_-" Mellie said in her sleep, reliving that horrendous night in her dream.

Jerry's strong hand covered her mouth and held her tense body down as she struggled to free herself, while his other hand explored under her flowery sundress. She tried to move around, to get out of his grip, but when he laid his large frame over her, she knew it was over. She couldn't beat him. He was stronger than she was. There was nothing more she could do.

He unzipped his pants and tore through the elastic of her panties with two fingers without a second thought. How he could get pleasure out of this, she would never understand. Tears began to flow down her face as she kept her eyes closed, until he grabbed her face and demanded she look at him. Her eyes burned at the sight of his evil grin, knowing it would just be worse if she didn't obey his orders. Her uncontrollable sobs were all that came out of her mouth as she choked on her tears. Her whole life, all her hard work, her future, snatched away from her in an instant.

Fitz tried to wake her again, not wanting to scare her. He knew he had to get her some professional help soon, whether she liked it or not. He rubbed her arm again and her eyes opened slowly, the tears and mumbles fading away.

"Mellie, it's Fitz. I'm here baby. It's ok," he whispers to her, letting her know that he was here for her.

Her shaking subsided and her breathing leveled off, but she still was numb. All she could feel was the same pain she felt that night, both physically and emotionally. She felt like she had been raped all over again. She could feel her entire lower body throbbing, aching, her head dizzy as she sat up, feeling like she was going to be sick again.

Fitz held her in his arms, rubbing her back and whispering to her softly, trying to reassure her she was ok. She was safe here with him. He moved her into his lap and stroked her hair back, her body leaning into his, almost becoming one. Mellie held on to his arms tightly, her tears subsiding, but the rest of her body still in shock. She closed her eyes, her breathing slowing, trying to forget the pain. They sat there together by the fire for thirty more minutes, broken yet relieved. Relieved they were away from Jerry for a little while, even if it didn't fix any of their pain.

Mellie raised up, about to go get ready, when Fitz can clearly see something's not right. She looks like she's weak, stressed, something - he couldn't put his finger on it.

"You feeling ok, Mels?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah, just give me a minute. I think it's just recollection or something. I'm gonna go take a shower real quick," she says, feeling like her body was being spun around as the pain from her abdomen down got worse.

She stood up slowly and began to pick up the blankets when Fitz reached for his phone in his pocket and saw his pants.

"_Mellie."_

She turned around upon hearing the seriousness and shock of his voice and her eyes met his upon seeing the blood stain on his pants leg. She dropped the blanket and stood there frozen, her entire body in shock, unsure of what to do.

"Just stay right there," he says, his voice cracking slightly in a panic.

He gets up and goes to the downstairs bathroom, grabbing a few dark towels from the cabinet and going back to the living room. He spreads them out on the couch and helps her to it, making sure she lies down.

"Just lie down. I'm going to call Dr. Ryde," he says, pulling out his phone and calling her without hesitation.

"Fitz, maybe we should just wait a little while and see if it stops-"

Mellie stops talking as the intense pain takes her breath away. She leans back and groans softly, her head killing her, her entire body feeling weak as she sees Fitz pacing the floor, talking to Dr. Ryde. She wishes he would listen to her, she knows her body better than he does.

Fitz walks over and puts his hand on her forehead, still listening to Dr. Ryde. She could see the stress on his face, the fear in his eyes that something was wrong with his wife.

"She's burning up," he tells Dr. Ryde on the other end.

He walks away and puts his hand on his hip, the other holding the phone. His heart was beating fast and his hands were shaking, needing answers, needing to see she was ok.

"Where do you want us to go?" He asks, keeping an eye on his aching wife.

Mellie closed her eyes again, knowing their publicist was not going to be happy they were going out now, especially after her going to The Queen earlier. Jackson had promised he would keep it under wraps and no one would find out.

"Give us 35 minutes or less. Ok. Thank you. Bye."

Fitz hangs up and shoves his phone in his pocket, going over to his wife, kneeling on the ground beside her.

"Mels, listen to me," he says, his voice shaky, "I'm going to change real quick and get you cleaned up. Then we're going to go straight to the ER because she's the OB-GYN on call there today. What do you need me to do for you?" He asks, still scared, still terrified of what could be happening to his wife. They couldn't lose this child. He couldn't handle it if they did.

"Just...help me change," Mellie says weakly, losing all her energy.

Fitz took off his jeans and put on the other pair he brought, then dug through the bag for Mellie some clean underwear and pants. He found what he needed and went over to the couch and she sat up slowly, him helping her get her pants off.

"Wait, let me go clean up-" she tries to get up, but he puts a hand on her shoulder and stops her.

"Dr. Ryde said to only change what you had to and bring everything else with us so she can fully examine and test you. I'm so sorry, baby," he whispers, hating not being able to help more.

Mellie sighed and reached to take her underwear off when tears filled her eyes, wanting Fitz to help, but unable to let him.

"Fitz. I'm so, so sorry," she chokes out, tears streaming down her face in shame. She still wasn't ready for him to see her naked. She was exhausted and didn't have time for this.

"It's ok, it's ok. Don't be sorry, Mel," he whispers, kissing her forehead.

He turns around so she'll feel more comfortable, but he can feel it hurting her as much as it hurts him. That his father has that kind of power over her.

Then it hit him.

_Power_.

He finally understood. None of this was a sexual thing with them. It was scarring for her and made her more resistant, but it was because of Jerry's power. It was all about this intense power he held over her. The fear he had instilled in her, the fear of if she told someone what he did, what he might do to her then. Every move she made, every thing she did, he had control over her mentally, he controlled every fiber of her being now. It was all a mental and safety thing between them. He just had to get past her mental distress.

"Did you bleed like this that night?" Fitz asks, trying to piece this together, trying to convince himself it isn't a miscarriage.

"Not as bad, but I didn't think a lot of it then. But I was scared. I lost a lot of a blood for the next few days. That's why I didn't come out much," she admits quietly.

"Have you been sore lately?" Fitz asks.

"I was afraid of him. I was afraid of being left alone, all by myself where he could get to me and have control over me again," she stutters, remembering Jerry's grip on her arms, his hot, intoxicated breath on her face, the evil look in his eyes.

"He would watch and wait, wait until I was alone and think about intimidating me, unless I was on the phone or in my office. He didn't want me telling anyone. He wanted to make sure his ass was covered," she says, still in her daze, ignoring his question.

Fitz knew she was getting weaker each second and could see she was still bleeding pretty badly, and they needed to go now.

"We need to go, Mel. She's waiting on us."

Mellie closed her eyes, shaking her head no slowly, wishing he would leave her be. She didn't want to go. She would rather stay here on the comfy couch by the fire.

"I need to know you're going to be ok," he says, with fear in his voice and a tear in his eye.

He grabs his red flannel shirt and helps her up, getting her fuzzy boots on and tying the shirt around her waist to cover her stained pants. He grabs the bag and puts an arm under her, getting her to the truck, putting his jacket on her out there. She didn't care anymore. She closed her eyes and complied with him, knowing she wasn't going to win this.

She was drained, she was tired.

She was done. She was ready to let go of _everything_.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy it. Things are starting to speed up, but not too fast.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>Mellie laid in the uncomfortable hospital bed behind the blue ER curtain, Fitz sitting by her side, holding her hand, staring at her hospital bracelet.<p>

Melanie R. Grant.

He loved her name. It was so intriguing, so beautiful, so empowering. He may legally be the governor, but he saw her as the one in charge.

He was glad Dr. Ryde got them in so quickly and got them in a comfortable space rather than the waiting room. She got them settled and promised to be right back with everything she needed to check her out. A young nurse came in and set her clipboard down on the table, then took her vital signs. She didn't say much, unsure of their situation yet, since she was just following Dr. Ryde's directions and getting her vitals. A few minutes later she began writing everything down and left, then came back with a paper gown, the one thing Mellie hated most.

"Change into this for me real quick and then I'll get an IV started," the nurse tells her.

She stepped out and took her clipboard with her, and Fitz helped his weak wife take her shirt off and put on the gown.

"I hate these things," Mellie whispers with a smile.

"But you look so good in them," Fitz tells her, loving any type of dress on her.

He smiled and she nudged his arm with her hand, knowing how he liked to tease her. She began to feel weaker and weaker, wondering what had caused all this. She figured it was the dream, it was all so real again, like he actually had control over her body again. She thought that was what had triggered everything. She knew Fitz was afraid, but she wasn't.

The nurse comes back in in her blue scrubs and ID clipped to her shirt, putting on a heart rate monitor and starting an IV in her right arm. She was quiet again, not making any conversation. Mellie figured she was fresh out of school and afraid as she hung up the IV bag.

"Don't worry about me when you prick me with that needle. I have tough skin. It won't hurt a bit," Mellie assures her, trying to get her to calm down.

She got the girl to smile a little as she stuck the needle in her, not hurting one bit. She fixed all the monitors and was about to leave when Mellie stopped her, reaching out for her arm.

"What's your name?" Mellie asks.

"My name is Tanner," the nurse says softly.

"That's a lovely name. How long have you been working here, Tanner?" Mellie asks, trying to keep Tanner calm by pretending she was calm.

"About two months. I started the day after I graduated nursing school in December."

"Do you enjoy being an ER nurse?"

"I love it. It never gets boring. I always wanted to help people get better," Tanner says with a little smile.

"That is amazing. And let me tell you, you are doing a wonderful job. I never would've guessed you were right out of school," Mellie sincerely says.

"Thank you."

Tanner smiles sheepishly and Dr. Ryde comes in, clipboard in hand, already gloved up.

"Tanner, how are you? Have you been taking good care of Mrs. Grant?" Dr. Ryde asks as she comes in, grabbing the chart and looking over it.

"Trying to," Tanner answers.

"She's been great," Mellie says, Fitz nodding in agreement. He stays quiet, just trying to be there for his wife.

"I'm still trying to convince her to go to medical school and come work with me as an OB-GYN. I'm hoping she'll consider it. Do you mind if she stays? If not, I can get someone else."

Dr. Ryde smiles at Tanner, who smiles back and stands to the side, waiting to be needed.

"She's fine," Mellie shrugs.

Mellie grips Fitz's hand tighter, feeling dizzy again, like her entire body is being spun and jerked in all directions. It almost got to her that time; she didn't know if she could handle another round of spinning without being sick.

"So have you had any abnormal bleeding like this recently or in the past?" Dr. Ryde asks with Tanner standing beside her.

"Just a little two other times within the past month. I didn't think anything of it, it didn't bother me at all. I'm only here because ... Fitz thinks I need to be," she sighs.

Dr. Ryde can hear the weakness in her voice and knows she's dehydrated. She can see the stress too, but doesn't know what it's from yet.

"Any other symptoms today?"

"I've been...really dizzy and achy and a little nauseous. I'm pretty tired, but that's nothing new," Mellie admits.

Fitz gently stroked the back of her hand with his thumb, looking down at their wedding rings, so worried and focused on her he's in his own little world.

"I would like to do a physical exam first, then an ultrasound, just to make sure everything's good. It'll be just a minute before they can bring it downstairs," she explains.

She calls upstairs to bring the portable ultrasound down and gets Tanner to help get Mellie ready to be examined.

"We're going to take your shoes and pants off now, ok? We'll get you a blanket to stay warm. It won't take long at all. Fitz, would you mind helping hold her leg?" Dr. Ryde asks, pulling him out of his thoughts.

Fitz gets up and helps get her pants off, then holds her leg up so Dr. Ryde can check her out. She sees the overwhelming amount of dried blood on her thighs and grabs the scissors, deciding to cut her underwear off. Mellie closes her eyes, trying to get back into the same mindset she was in the first exam. She had to relax.

Tanner sighed quietly as Dr. Ryde began, already having an idea of what might have happened. Dr. Ryde readjusted the light to get a better look and briefly stopped, trying to think. Fitz bit his tongue when he saw her. It was taking all his strength to not leave and go kill Jerry right now. He had caused this.

"Tanner, will you get me a swab kit and some hydrogen peroxide please?" Dr. Ryde asks, anxiously pausing for a second after saying Tanner's name. She didn't want to believe something like this had happened, not to good folks like Fitz and Mellie.

Tanner lowered her leg and went over to the drawer in the corner, reaching in the bottom drawer, pulling out the swab kit and peroxide. Her idea had just been reassured; she and Dr. Ryde were thinking the same thing.

Dr. Ryde took a few swabs and dropped them in the bag as Tanner took them to another nurse to go take off for testing. As soon as Tanner came back, she began cleaning her up.

Mellie was almost asleep at this point, getting warm and relaxed again, feeling safe. Dr. Ryde took ten more minutes to carefully inspect and clean her, noticing there was still some bleeding going on. She put everything in a bag and dropped it in the biohazard box, then helped get her resituated. She noticed Mellie was asleep and Fitz hated to wake her, but knew she needed to be seen about.

An aide came in with the ultrasound and Dr. Ryde warmed it up, then woke Mellie up gently. She came to and took Fitz's hand again, scared Jerry was going to come around.

"You ready to start this ultrasound, Mel?" Dr. Ryde asks excitedly, trying to keep the mood up.

She nodded and smiled, happy for the few minutes of peaceful sleep. She was so thankful for it. She could actually rest here, somewhere he couldn't get her. Their eyes were all glued to the screen, waiting to hear a heartbeat again.

Mellie closed her eyes, almost a little afraid, until she heard that strong little heartbeat fill the air. It was a relief for everyone, and she looked up at Fitz with a smile when they both heard it.

"This is one good-looking kid. You want to know the sex?"

"Hmm...not yet," Fitz says.

"We'll wait a little while." She smiles at Fitz and he smiles back, stroking her beautiful hair back.

"Whatever floats your boat," Dr. Ryde says, still watching the screen.

She looked lower for a few minutes, then quickly turned it off, cleaning the wand off and putting it up. She wanted Tanner to be gone when she spoke with them.

"Tanner, can you take this back upstairs please?"

Tanner nodded and took off her gloves, throwing them away and getting behind the machine, pushing it out of the makeshift room and down the hall to the elevator. Dr. Ryde sat at the foot of the bed, taking her glasses off with that serious look Fitz and Mellie knew meant business. Mellie knew she knew.

"You said you had been taking birth control, right?" Dr. Ryde asks.

Mellie nodded and heard the hustle and bustle of the halls outside the curtain, wondering how many people saw them come in and how many papers were already making up stories.

"You have a pretty serious internal tear and I believe the intense bleeding was caused by stress and abruptly coming off the pill. Did you ever feel any pain or-"

"I was hurting pretty bad earlier, but not before then," Mellie cuts her off without hesitation.

Mellie felt like her body weighed three times her weight and like she couldn't even open her eyes. She was so exhausted, she could barely think. Dr. Ryde then realized she needed a transfusion and soon.

"Mellie, I'm going to ask you a very serious question and I need you to answer it honestly for me. Were you raped recently?" Dr. Ryde asks, needing to know how to help her.

"Why would you ask that?" Mellie asks, trying to play dumb, trying to keep her cool.

She looked at Fitz and saw the hurt and tears filling his eyes as he nodded.

"It's ok to tell her," he mouthed.

She nodded and closed her eyes, tears still coming. She took a deep breath and squeezed his hand as she told her the truth.

"_Yes_."


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N**: Thank you for reading and your reviews! I'm so thankful for each person that reads even one chapter. Hope you enjoy :)

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>"Ok," Dr. Ryde says with a quiet sigh, nodding slowly, thinking through this. She had to handle this carefully; rape victims were always sensitive in different ways.<p>

"How long ago did this happen? Did you file a police report?"

"Seven weeks ago. I...I didn't file a report. I didn't even tell Fitz until the other day. I couldn't file a report...not against...my own father-in-law," Mellie whispers ashamedly.

She began shaking as tears came to her eyes, feeling an anxiety attack coming on. Fitz got up and held her close, rubbing her back and whispering to her.

Dr. Ryde pulled out her beeper and called for Tanner, then shoved it back in her pocket and waited for Tanner to show up as she watched Fitz slowly calm her down.

Tanner comes in and stops behind Dr. Ryde, knowing this wasn't good. Any time crying was involved, it wasn't good.

"Fitz, would you step out in the hall with me please? Tanner needs to ask Mellie some... questions," Dr. Ryde says, putting on her glasses and standing up, looking at Fitz.

"Mel. I'll be right outside baby. It's ok. I promise," he whispers, kissing the top of her head.

Mellie nodded and let go of him slowly, leaning back into her pillow, terrified. She told them and thought Jerry was already after her.t He stepped out into the hall with Dr. Ryde, and went into the first empty room she found, right across the hall. She and a stressed Fitz sat down, her in a chair, him on the bed, both still in shock.

"First things first, you know she did not have a miscarriage. I know that's-well, a small weight off your shoulders compared to everything else," she exhales slowly, not expecting any of this to happen, especially not to them.

"It's a _huge_ weight for me. Look, she never got a chance to tell you, but...right before I called, I had woken her up from a bad dream. She told me that...she relived the entire thing. That's all the dream was," said Fitz, his voice cracking as he finished speaking.

"This could have been triggered by that, reliving that trauma, that stress, sent her body into overdrive. Do you know anything about that night?" She asks softly, looking into his eyes, knowing that's where she would find her answer.

"She told me earlier she bled more than she thought she did. She probably needed medical attention then too. God, I am an idiot. How did I not see this coming?" He closes his eyes and slams his fist against the bedside table out of anger and guilt.

"Fitz, this is neither of your faults. There is no reason to blame either of you. Did she mention anything else?"

Fitz ran his fingers through his hair and tried to slow his thoughts down long enough to make sense of any of them, his ankle throbbing, feeling phantom sensations again.

"He's... twice my size, so no matter what he did...it scarred her forever. It's always a power thing with him. I guess he felt intimidated by her and wanted to bring her back down to size? Why- no, better yet, _how_- how would she even intimidate him in any way? She's the sweetest person I know... I don't even know where to begin... she won't let me see any part of her naked, she feels guilty for this. She sees a lot of him in me and it hurts because I'm not like that. _My own wife isn't supposed to be afraid of me._ She's scared he'll come after her if she tells, or at least that's what I think. He's too drunk or busy screwing some girl to notice, honestly," Fitz says, wiping a tear away, hating both himself and his father right now.

"Unfortunately, all of these sound like the normal coping signs. I wish she would've come in then so we could've gotten a rape kit done to have as evidence, whether she had told us it was your father or not. The tear looked like it was caused by forceful entry and was trying to heal itself, but all it needs is time. I'm going to refer you to the rape crisis unit on the fourth floor. They can better help her to cope. I want to keep her for 24 hours to watch her, make sure she gets enough platelets and IVs. The tear was second degree and on the verge of being infected, so I would like to have stitches put in so it can heal correctly. I'm also putting her on bed rest for two months so the tear can have time to heal and as a precaution. She can only go out for doctor's appointments or major events after they've been cleared through me, understood?" Dr. Ryde says sternly, giving him a serious look.

Fitz sighs, deciding to accept fate, as a tear streams down his face. It hit him hard again.

His wife was helpless, and so was he.

"Yeah," he whispers in defeat.

She stood up and sat beside him, putting her arm around him, trying to comfort him in this dark situation.

"Fitz, listen to me. This is not easy, for either one of you. Extensive damage was done, but only so much can be healed. It will be different now for you and your relatives. But you and Mellie are there to hold each other up, to push each other forward each day, to get up and _live_. Live life to the fullest. Love as much and as many as you can. It will be painful and a struggle, but it is _necessary_. And I will be here with you two through this. So will our therapists. And if you want justice, _we will get it_. All we need is for her to say yes. We can get it. I mean no disrespect towards your father, but given his past, we can get him on this," Dr. Ryde explains, reassuring him that everything was going to work out and be ok.

Not the same, not fixed, but ok.

Fitz's only reaction to all of it was a simple nod. He had no words. She knew how bad he wanted it. She knew Mellie wanted it worse. That strength, that power hovering over her to be gone. Dr. Ryde hugged him tightly as he sobbed quietly, hating she didn't know sooner.

"I'm going to see if I can get her in the crisis unit tonight. Let's go see how she's doing."

They go back to the curtained area across the hall to find Mellie, holding an oxygen mask to her face, laughing with Tanner, who's now sitting on the bed beside her after listening to her story.

"Did I miss something?" Fitz asks cheerfully.

Fitz strolled up with a smile and one hand in his pocket, loving seeing her smile for the first time in weeks. She finally quit laughing long enough a few seconds later to talk.

"I was just...telling her about the time...you tripped over that cable on national TV and acted like nothing happened...it was hilarious..." Mellie laughs with Tanner and tears come to their eyes.

Fitz chuckles softly, remembering the moment vividly. It was his first live national television appearance as Governor and as he walked to the couch for the interview, he tripped over some cables under the rug and tried to brush it off, like he meant to do it. He got phone calls, emails, texts, every kind of communication possible from friends and family, all enjoying the laugh and telling him everyone would forget it soon.

"How could I ever forget?" Fitz asks with a grin.

Mellie smiled and a nurse steps in, handing Dr. Ryde a clipboard, then leaves quickly for the nurses' station. She reads over it quickly, then sets it down on the metal tray cart, looking at her watch-7:08 A.M.

"Tanner's going to take you up to 410 and get settled in, ok? I'll be by in a little while," Dr. Ryde tells Mellie, needing to go fulfill her other duties.

"Ok," she whispers quietly.

She looks at Fitz and can see the concern in his eyes as she slowly gets up and makes her way to the wheelchair by the bed, ready to get into a room. Fitz picks up his small bag and jacket and follows Tanner and Mellie to the elevator, seeing they're getting some looks, and decides to call Jackson once they get upstairs.

As the elevator doors open on the fourth floor, they make a left turn down the hallway and Mellie figures out where they're at as soon as she sees the letters RCU on the double doors they go through. She grabs his hand and looks at him in fear, not wanting this to get out.

"_Fitz_-"

"It's ok, baby. I promise. They're only going to help," he tells her, trying to reassure her. He knew they couldn't back out of this anyway - she needed help.

She squeezes his hand tighter as they enter 410 and get settled in, lying in the bed, wishing they were at home. Tanner gets her all set up and takes her chart out to the nurse's station, promising to be back to check on her. Mellie feels exactly like she did that night - filthy, destroyed, like she got hit by a bus.

"What if someone finds out? _Everything_ will be ruined. The governor's wife doesn't get raped, Fitz. _That's not how it goes_-" Her voice breaks as she tries to fight back painful sobs.

"Mellie, please. This is not your fault. Jerry is a sick and cruel man, and he needs help. We are not on this pedestal that everyone else puts us on. We are just Fitz and Mellie, trying to help the state of Texas. We have had some great achievements in our lifetimes and overcome massive obstacles, but we are so much more than the Governor and First Lady. Don't _ever_ let them get to you because of me. I'm going to call Jackson, he'll handle all of this, send someone out since I gave security the day off. It will all be ok. I am more worried about _your health_ than what anyone else has to say about us. You let _me_ handle this. You just focus on getting better," he says, never having cared about what others thought of him. Most of it was gossip and lies, anyway. Her being ok was more important to him than his image being ok.

He puts his hand on her shoulder and kisses her forehead, hoping Jackson is already awake.

"If someone comes in, I'm in the bathroom taking a phone call. I'll be out as soon as I can," he says, going toward the bathroom.

Mellie nods as he walks into the depressing tiled bathroom, shutting the heavy door behind him and pulling out his phone. He calls Jackson's cell phone first, glad it only rang once before he picked up. Fitz's heart was beating fast and his palms were getting sweaty.

"Mr. Grant?" Jackson answers his cell phone, wondering what Fitz wants at this time of day - he never called this early.

"Hey Jack, it's Fitz. How are you this morning?"

"About to head to the office, a little surprised to hear from you this early. Everything ok?" He asks, curious as to why his boss is calling him this early.

"...Not exactly. I'll go into details when you get here. We're at the hospital on 7th. Room 409. Mellie...was raped. I-"

"_What_?" Jackson asks, his jaw dropping, his breath taken away.

Jackson almost dropped his phone and sat down at his kitchen table, not believing this.

"Look, we had no plans for the night, I gave security the day off. She went to The Queen with Jerry, there were drugs, and she left. We came out to the house since she knew Jerry would take this girl he met back to the mansion. Look, just go by there, grab some clothes for us, and send two guards out there and three undercover ones here. We've been seen, so make sure you stay on the down low when you come in," Fitz tells him, leaning his forehead against the cold bathroom wall.

"I'm on my way. I'll send Chris and Lance now, bring Ben with me," Jackson says without hesitation.

"_Fitz_."

"Yeah?" He asks, his heart about to beat out of his chest. He still cannot fathom the thought that those words just came out of his mouth, that his wife was _raped_, that they _needed_ help.

"I can hear you breathing. Calm down. It'll be ok. We'll fix this. I'll see you soon. Bye," Jackson says, hanging up.

Fitz hangs up sadly and puts his phone in his back pocket, leaning his head against the wall, his emotions everywhere. His anger, sadness, rage, stress, shock, everything, all at once was insanity to him. If he couldn't handle this, he was wondering how Mellie was even coping. He went back out to the room and sat beside Mellie, who was now dozing off. Fitz leans back in the uncomfortable chair, debating moving to the couch, when he hears a knock on the door, assuming its Jackson.

"Come on in, Jackson," Fitz mumbles sleepily.

The door opens slowly and a new nurse comes in, walking over to Fitz. He stands up quickly to greet her, almost losing his balance from lack of sleep.

"I'm Katie. I'll be your nurse while you're here, Mr. ..." The nurse trails off, not knowing his name.

"Grant. But Fitz is fine. This is my wife, Mellie. Look, I'm sorry, but we'll have some visitors in and out for a little while this morning-"

Katie instantly recognizes who they are and remembers she has to follow protocol.

"I don't mean to be rude, sir, but...this being a trauma unit, there needs to be a feeling of safety and familiarity here, and having too many visitors here is unstable. There is an empty room down the hall I can let you and your guests use-"

"That'll be great, thank you. But it is necessary that a guard stay with her at all times unless she states otherwise. Agent Chris will be with her, agent Ben will be with me, and Agent Lance will be at the door," Fitz says, not giving her a choice.

"Yes sir. I'll just need them to sign some release forms-"

"There's a law about this, right? HIPAA? That you can't disclose any patient information to the public?" He shoots her down, having no patience left.

"Yes sir. I promise that neither I nor the hospital will or are legally able to release any information about your wife. You're in good hands here, sir," she says calmly.

"Fitz...is fine, Katie. I'm sorry...we got off to a rough start. I'm just...worried. That's all," he sighs, feeling bad for being so short with her.

"I understand. Tanner said it's been a rough morning for her, so I'm going to let her sleep while she can. The surgery won't be until 11 am. When your guest gets here, just go to the nurse's station and ask for the key to 413. I'll be back in a little while."

"Thank you," Fitz says, following her to the door and shutting it behind her.

He sits back down, this time on the surprisingly soft, tan leather couch. He leans back, his head hurting from lack of sleep, and closes his eyes for a second, hoping he could get a few minutes' sleep before Jackson got here.

The second his eyes shut, all he could hear with gunshots.

Gunshots from that night. He would never forget their sound.

He would never forget his friends.

He still wore Warren's tag beside his around his neck every single day. Warren's wife had the other; she sent the second to Fitz after he got back. He received it while he was still in the hospital for surgery on his foot, and it hit him then. Warren was gone.

His friend wasn't coming back. His friend wasn't getting relocated. His friend wasn't going to see his family again.

Fitz sat straight up and opened his eyes, his mind still racing. He needed to calm down. He pulled out his phone again, calling Jackson back.

"Hey Jack, you out of town yet?"

"About ten minutes away from you, what's up?" Jackson asks, Chris sitting beside him in his SUV and Ben and Lance following behind.

"Get me a double latte, extra sugar, two shots. And a bottle of whiskey. And a cigarette," Fitz sighs, needing to relax.

"Will do. See you soon."

Fitz laid down this time, trying to relax again. His entire body felt like it weighed tons, like he was being sucked into this couch and would go straight through the white tiled floor. He dozed off for the next thirty minutes, only awakened by the tap of loud footsteps against the cold floor. He sat up and saw Jackson and the guys come in, setting a duffel bag by the door.

"Hey," Fitz says, awakening quickly.

He got up and went over to them, still standing in the middle of the room, Jackson in shock when he laid eyes on Mellie, lying in the bed, asleep.

"_Mellie_," Jackson whispers almost inaudibly, none of this feeling real.

"Jack, we need to talk. Chris, I told them you would be with Mellie and Lance would be at the door. Come get us if anything happens," Fitz commands.

"Yes sir," Chris says with a nod.

Chris takes his position by Mellie's side and Lance stands outside the door, both dressed in jeans and sweatshirts with their badges and guns under their clothes. Fitz leads Jackson and Ben to the nurses' station to get the key to 413, then takes them inside, locking the door behind them. Jackson sits down on the couch and hands Fitz his coffee, Ben handing him a brown paper bag with cigarettes and whiskey inside.

"Fitz...what...what happened?" Jackson asks, having no idea how they even got to this point.

Fitz opens the bag and takes a big drink from the small bottle of whiskey, the burning sensation in his throat feeling good. He sips his coffee and sets it down on the cart by the bed, where he sits, seeing Ben by the door. Fitz looks back at Jackson and sighs, not knowing where to begin the story.

"Look...you need to hear her side of everything. She knows more than I do. I guess...I'll start from the beginning."


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:** Sorry I've been slow to update. This chapter is a little bit longer. Hope you enjoy it and feel free to leave a review with your thoughts! Thank you so much for reading.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal._

* * *

><p>Jackson pulls his tape recorder out of his black leather jacket pocket and gets out his notepad, unknowingly not ready for what's coming his way.<p>

"It was a week ago, the day we came out to the office and ran into you. We had been out earlier that day, to the doctor. We found out she's pregnant," Fitz explains, it still being a shock to him that they would be parents.

Jackson sighs, closing his eyes as Fitz smiles, still remembering that moment. The fear still lingered in the back of his mind, but the happiness overpowered it.

"So you went to a doctor's office alone," Jackson says in a rather unhappy tone.

"Yes. I paid attention, no one saw us. We were careful."

"Who's the doctor?" He asks, needing to know if he needs to negotiate something with her.

"Dr. Francis Ryde. She's on here today," Fitz fires back impatiently.

Jackson takes a few notes, shaking his head, knowing this will take a few checks to blow everything over.

"Continue," Jackson sighs as he looks back at Fitz.

"We got the call that afternoon that confirmed it. Then came to the office. We got some dinner on the way home, came back, and got ready for bed. I could tell something wasn't right with her, she was anxious, upset, I couldn't put my finger on it. She...then proceeded to tell me that..."

He paused, the words choking him as he looked down, then stared directly into Jackson's eyes.

"...Jerry had raped her six weeks earlier."

"Fuck, Fitz, are you kidding me right now? _Jerry_?" Jackson asks, still not able to wrap his head around the thought.

"Why would I ever be anything less than serious about someone _raping my wife?_" Fitz growls through his teeth angrily, gripping the mattress tightly, refraining from grabbing Jackson by the collar.

"I'm sorry. It's just...if anyone already knows about any of that, we're in trouble."

"Just hear me out. The doctor said she was nine weeks pregnant, so there's no speculation about who the baby's father is. Anyway, she heard there was an elite party at The Queen thrown by one of Jerry's friends. She asked Jerry if he was going, because she was tired of being cooped up and wanted to go. He said he would go, and I was exhausted from work and she told me to just stay home. I knew Tyler would be there, so I asked him to keep an eye out for her. But once she got there...she said there were drunks and drugs everywhere and was coming home. She also said..." Fitz had to stop, almost choking on his words. Talking about his father hiring a prostitute was _sick_, a shot to his heart. He knew ever since he found out his father had cheated on his mom that Jerry had reached a new level of low.

"… she saw Jerry getting a prostitute and drugs, knew he would be coming back to the Mansion, so she wanted to go to the house. She took the truck and gave the girl money for a cab, Tyler followed her home, she picked me up and we went to the house. We got settled in, laid down by the fire, fell asleep. I woke up around four, heard her mumbling, and woke her up once I realized she was having a bad dream. I figured out she was dreaming about the night Jerry raped her, and put her in my lap to try and calm her down. But when she got up...there was blood everywhere. I called Dr. Ryde and she said to come here. She checked her out, said the bleeding was because of stress and reliving that night, that she was dehydrated. She cleaned her up, found a pretty bad internal tear and asked if she had been raped. I told her it was ok to tell her, and she got us admitted up here. She said she would have to be on bed rest for two months to let the tear heal and we had to get events cleared through her first," Fitz sighs, hating explaining everything over and over again, reliving that moment Mellie first told him of the assault, then when she told Dr. Ryde, and everything in between.

Jackson's mind went blank, knowing his hands were full now, ready to talk to Mellie. He immediately began thinking of his plan of action, writing a few things down. Fitz watched him anxiously and finished his hot coffee, then finished the whiskey.

"Look, I know we are in way over our heads, but I never got a chance to call you. It all happened so fast tonight, and she told me she didn't want anyone to know she was pregnant for a few more weeks," Fitz defends her decision.

"I understand. So rape, doctor, The Queen, drugs, the girl, and here. Here's what we're going to do. First, I'll handle everyone here, get that done. When anyone asks, she came in for a hurt knee after slipping in the shower. She'll be at home for the most part for two months, that's plenty of time for it to heal and her not to be seen. Jerry's been seen getting prostitutes before, I'll handle it and the drugs if and when the time comes. Mellie was at The Queen to catch up with her old friends, had no idea drugs and money were changing hands, left early because she was tired. Just bending the truth there. Y'all went to the doctor for her yearly checkup. I know you talked to Dr. Ryde over the phone, the guys are checking the lines as we speak to make sure they're still secure. Our real challenge is...the rape. It all depends on what she wants to do, whether or not she wants to identify him as the offender, as to how we approach it, if we even need to. Let me make a few phone calls, get this out of the papers, call Jerry's publicist, and I'll talk to Mels when she wakes up," Jackson tells him, trying to cover all their bases at once.

"Thank you...so much, Jack. I don't even know where we would be without you," he says, relieved, grateful for Jackson.

"Fitz...listen to me. Right now I am your friend first. Whatever you need me to do, doesn't matter what it is, I'll do it. I'm here to help. Just a text away. You name it," Jackson reminds him of their friendship, and wants to help them however he can.

Fitz sighs and rubs his eyes, lying back on the bed for a minute, feeling like he is emotionally falling apart. He knows sleep and having his Lieutenant Governor go through the bills would be much easier and a weight off him. He needs to rest to be able to be Mellie's strength.

"Call Mike and tell him to give Pete the rest of the bills to go through, but I get a finished list to go through before finalizing them. Let's go have a smoke," he says without a second thought.

Fitz gets up, taking the cigarettes out of the bag and putting them in his pocket, then taking the key back to the nurse's station. They head up to the sixth floor garden balcony to get away, not wanting to see the crowd and possible tabloids outside. It was almost nine thirty now, broad daylight. Jackson wasn't worried about them being seen coming in, considering it was still dark out that early. They all sit on the concrete benches in the middle of the garden, each taking a cigarette from Fitz, knowing he meant business. Fitz never smoked unless it was serious, and he really wanted some weed, but knew he couldn't get away with it here. Ben looked around and saw no one else in the small garden, consisting of four concrete benches in a square around a fake tree in the middle of the garden, and four more lining the brown concrete walls, surrounded by real, lush flora and fauna. It was dimly lit considering the only light in there was coming from balcony opening or door window letting in light from the hall, and it was overcast today.

Jackson lit up, handing Fitz the black lighter and watching him light his cigarette, close his eyes and take a long drag, then exhale slowly, satisfyingly.

"These are pretty good, Jackson. You did good picking these out for a non-smoker," Ben compliments him.

"Learned a lot working in California, man. Always kept some on me, you wouldn't believe the clients I had and how much they liked to smoke," Jackson chuckles, enjoying the garden and pleasant weather for the day.

He watches Fitz as he becomes more relaxed, breathes slower, and continues smoking. He really hopes this doesn't get to him too badly.

"Whatcha thinking about there, Chief?" Jackson asks, nodding at Fitz. He knew they all wanted to hear his thoughts.

"I'm imagining sitting at home, not worrying about a single thing, smoking with Mel," Fitz exhales slowly, wishing Mellie was with him right now.

"Well, is it working?"

"It's pretty damn good, or I'm just that desperate," Fitz shrugs with a laugh.

They all laugh after a relaxing minute and go back to the room to find Mellie still sleeping, Chris still by her side. Fitz stops at the foot of the bed, noticing the soft blue walls for the first time, the small window covered with plastic white blinds above the couch, and countless wires coming from the machines surrounding his wife. He saw Jackson step out into the hall to call Peter and a few others as he sat down on the couch, Ben standing by the bathroom.

"Why don't you come sit, Ben?" Fitz offers, patting the cushion beside him.

Ben slowly walks over and sits down hesitantly, never have gotten too friendly with his boss. He knew he was there for work unless he was told otherwise.

"How you been?"

"I've been ok. How are the bills coming?" He asks Fitz.

"I just signed them off to Mike, I can't finish the rest. You and Chris been watching the new guy?" He questions.

"Yeah, he's ok. I think with a little more time he'll be fine," Ben says, having faith in Lance and his abilities.

"That's good to hear," Fitz says, knowing they wouldn't have picked a bad agent.

"Sir?"

"Yeah?" Fitz looks over at him, wondering what he'll ask.

"I just want you to know, I'm here for you."

Fitz sighs, it meaning a lot to him hearing this from someone so young, a guy just like him when he was 26, offering to do whatever he could to help them.

"Thank you, Ben. It really means a lot to both of us," Fitz says honestly, realizing how lucky he was.

Fitz hugged him with a tear in his eye, unbelievably thankful for all the people around them.

* * *

><p>"What do you want to know?" Mellie asks with a low growl, not having time for this. She was still half asleep.<p>

She sat up in the bed, propped up by two flat pillows, barely hearing Jackson's questions. She looked over at the generic black alarm clock on the light-stained wood nightstand; it read 10:23 a.m. She was doped up on pain meds and was still exhausted.

"Everything that's happened, from the night with Jerry until now," Jackson explains, notepad in hand.

"I...it would take hours for me to tell you," she sighs, not wanting to talk to him right now.

"All we have is time. But my first question is this: do you want to go after Jerry publicly and press charges or not?"

Mellie sighed, knowing she's waited too long to make this decision and creating a defensive case would be practically impossible now. It would be her word against his, and she had a feeling his friends would be on the jury. Not to mention the press, the counseling, the rehab, the money, everything else to go along with this huge story, would cause an uproar for them. She looks at him with tears in her eyes and wants to say yes, but knows she can't.

"No," she whispers, her sad eyes never leaving his intense brown ones. He saw the hurt in her. He knew it was killing her not to tell, not to get him behind bars for this.

"Are you sure?" He asks sternly again, wishing she would say yes so he could at least try to get Jerry.

Mellie nods her head with her eyes closed, holding back sobs, her death grip not letting up on the custard yellow blanket covering her.

"Mellie -"

"**No**. I said no, ok? I can't ruin everything for us. We have all...worked too damn hard to get where we are...to let this _one thing_ bring us down," she says, choking on her words, her voice breaking. She had to be strong. She couldn't be weak and lose everything.

"We can still help you even without telling anyone it was him. Who was there that night? Anyone who was on the property," Jackson tries to provoke her thoughts and get info to still pursue Jerry.

Mellie sighs, trying to remember who was there. She vaguely remembered faces, only that it was late and there were a handful of people left.

"Fitz was upstairs asleep. Jerry was downstairs on the couch working, the guard was at the gate, I think there was someone else patrolling near the road. I don't really remember," she shakes her head, wishing she knew who was there.

She looks at the tubes leading into her arms, the clear liquid and new blood flowing into her veins, already getting her energy back. She was feeling alive again. She was ready for anything, ready for the hunt, ready for the kill. She was focused now. She needed this to be over.

"Look, Jackson, I went to The Queen tonight just to have a good time, I didn't mean anything bad by it or by not taking security. I didn't want to create a scene. I asked Jerry if he had heard about it, he didn't, and decided he wanted to come along. I got there, the whole place was crawling with black market drugs and drunks, so I left. Jerry had drove, I took the spare keys, and left. I gave the prostitute he was talking to $50 for a cab and her troubles, and Tyler followed me to the mansion. I knew Jerry would more than likely go back to the mansion with her to show it off, so I picked up Fitz and we went to the house. That's _all_ that happened," she explains, wondering how upset he really is. He was acting too calm.

"Who did you speak to while you were there?"

"Tyler and an old friend of mine, Danielle Hawthorne. She asked about Fitz, where he was, and I said he was at home going over the new bills and Jerry was there. I sat with her and her friends for a while, she offered me a joint, I declined it, and left. End of story."

She can see the anger in his eyes and knows he's serious when he sets down his notepad and rubs his face with his trembling hand. He could not believe the words that just came out of her mouth. He was furious.

"How many people were there? I need to know how much _damage control _to do for people seeing the _First Lady of Texas declining illegal substances,"_ he growls in a low tone through his teeth, knowing he has his hands full. He couldn't believe she had done such a thing, go to a bar knowing there were drugs, being around weed.

Mellie huffed softly, turning her head away from him, wishing he would stop. Just leave her alone, let her grieve.

"Jackson, _stop_. I shouldn't have gone, ok? You're right, you're _right_ and I'm wrong. Now please, leave me the hell alone so I can get out of here," she says sadly, his comment enraging her.

She couldn't stop the tears from rolling down her face as he dropped his head in shame, knowing he was a little too hard on her right now. She crossed her arms and never even glanced his way, upset beyond words with him.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly, knowing he messed up badly.

"Do whatever you have to do to keep it all quiet. We'll pay you however much it costs," she mumbles quietly, not looking his way.

Jackson gets up and gathers his notebook and tape recorder, putting it all in his brown Italian leather bag, picking it and his jacket up. He puts on his jacket and walks out the door, letting Chris back in and stopping Fitz in the hallway. Fitz can sense something's not right with him, he's being too calm, not like his usual perky yet serious self.

"I'm going to go back to the office unless you need me here," Jackson says, sounding a little depressed.

"I'll call you before we leave. Everything ok?" Fitz asks.

"I crossed the line with her, and I apologized. I'm terribly sorry, Fitz. Please let her know that," he says sincerely.

"I will. Thank you."

Jackson shakes his hand and walks around the corner to the elevator, Fitz watching him the entire time, wondering what he meant.

* * *

><p>Mellie wakes up groggily the next morning, still sore from surgery, seeing Fitz is nowhere to be found in the room. She grabs her phone off the table and sees it's only 6:10 a.m. She sits up, realizing she's still trapped in this hellacious place, and then hears a tiny knock on the door. Tanner comes in to see about her and she sighs with relief.<p>

"Hey Tanner," she says softly with a smile.

"Good morning, Mellie. Did you sleep well?" She asks, wondering how she really is.

"Yeah," Mellie sighs.

She continues to look around the room, so ready to be out. She never enjoyed hospitals, never had ever since her grandmother died when she was 12.

"Where's Fitz?" She asks, surprised he didn't leave her a note.

"He stepped out to get some fresh air. Dr. Ryde said she'll be here around 6:30 before she gets off at 7," Tanner tells her.

"Ok," Mellie says quietly, almost inaudible, still tired.

Tanner checks her vital signs again, everything looking better than when she came in yesterday.

"Are you afraid of dying?" Mellie asks suddenly. Tanner knew she had been thinking hard about that for a minute.

"I've...never thought about it, really. Maybe?" She says, not sure how to answer. She had never really thought about it.

"When you've come so close to dying," Mellie begins slowly, remembering everything, "When you've cheated death _multiple_ times...you begin to think it's actually your time to go. Each time I would think, "It's not my time, not yet." But then...yesterday...I thought that was it. Fitz was freaking out when he noticed it, and I told him to wait a little while and see if it got better. I wasn't afraid. I was afraid because of all the blood, but not of dying. I thought this was it. _I was prepared to die_," she admits. She wasn't afraid. She accepted it. She was ready. The end would be where she began.

She looks back through her past, parts she had never told Fitz, and saw her life flash before her eyes each time, never playing out the way it actually had.

"Are you going to stay?" Tanner tries to change the subject.

Mellie looked at her and shook her head no gently.

"Not now. I can't stay here, I don't _want _to stay here. I want to go home, I can't create a scene by being here. Fitz doesn't need that on his plate, too. He did talk me into seeing a psychiatrist Friday," she explains.

"That's good," Tanner nods slowly. She was glad she was still going to get help.

She sits on the edge of the bed and takes Mellie's hand, taking a deep breath, smiling a little. She needed to tell her this.

"My older sister was raped when she was in college. I was only fifteen when it happened, and I felt the same way Fitz probably does; wanting to see the rapist dead. She knew the guy, went to the hospital afterwards, and they even found enough evidence to put him away. He's still in jail to this day, and you know where she is?" Tanner asks.

"Where?" Mellie asks curiously.

"Police director at D.C.P.D. She didn't let it stop her. She talked to people, realized he could not control her again, and never looked back. She finished college, went to the Academy, signed up for the National Guard, did a tour in Pakistan, came back, worked her way up. She made something of herself because she knew she wasn't worthless. She knew she had it in her, and no one could stop her. You can't let this hold you back, Mellie. You have to keep moving forward and do the _best you can_."

"Yeah," she whispers, realizing it was true.

They sit in silence for a moment and Mellie sees Fitz pacing in the hallway since Tanner opened the blinds when she came in. He's talking to someone on his phone, and she can tell he's angry because of how red his face and ears got.

"Are you gonna go to med school?" Mellie asks out of the blue.

Tanner sighs and shrugs, unsure of her future.

"I don't know...I really like being a floor nurse, but Dr. Ryde says I have so much more potential..."

"You do. I can see it in you. You would be great working alongside her every single day," Mellie says with a smile. Tanner was way better than half the older nurses out here and she knew it.

"You think so?" She asks hopefully, surprised someone believed in her.

"I _know_ so. From the second I saw you, you were writing down notes as fast as you could, and eyeing the kit cart. You knew what to do from the second you saw me," Mellie explains. She knew Tanner was a smart one.

A knock on the door interrupts their conversation, and it swings open to reveal Dr. Ryde and Chris coming in. Chris takes a seat by Mellie's side, and Tanner stands up, waiting for further instructions from Dr. Ryde.

"How you feeling today, Mellie?" Dr. Ryde asks, looking over her report once, then setting it down on the foot of the bed. She could tell Mellie was already improving; the IVs and transfusions had done her a world of good.

"Better. Sore," she says sleepily. She hated feeling this tired.

"Probably so. I promise it will heal much faster this way. I just wanted to tell you a few things before I release you," Dr. Ryde says.

"Ok."

She looks over at Chris and his eyes meet hers, paying close attention.

"You're my man, Chris. I already told this to Fitz, but you're going to hold them accountable," she gives him a look and then looks back at Mellie.

Chris nods and Mellie listens closely, ignoring the now buzzing cell phone in her hand.

"Good news is, you won't have to come back to have the stitches removed. They're dissolvable and should go away in a week or two. However, I am putting you on modified bed rest for it to heal completely and to hopefully prevent another episode like this from happening. No stairs, no getting up without someone there. Sitting up is limited to three hours a day. I want you completely de-stressed. Fitz will take care of _everything_. Any public events or outings get cleared though me first. Besides, you won't feel like getting up for a few weeks. Past that, just keep doing whatever you've been doing, and I'll see you in three weeks. Ok?" Dr. Ryde says, knowing this was their wake up call. They knew now this was more serious than they played it off to be, and that Mellie needed to take care of herself to heal.

Mellie nodded her head and thanked her for everything, glad she was there with them. She couldn't have handled all this as well with a new doctor, explaining everything. Dr. Ryde assured her it was no big deal and told her to call if they needed anything, then went off the clock. Tanner helped Mellie gather her few things and she checked her phone, seeing her mom had called. She knew Fitz had told her everything. She decided it was best to call her back later once they got settled at home.

Fitz walked in the room with his hand behind his back, the other slipping his phone in his back pocket. His sheepskin shoes tapped lightly against the floor as he made his way to her side, taking in the view of every inch of her gorgeous body. He grinned softly as he saw Mellie stand up, wearing his gray v-neck and red plaid shirt, which was too big for her. He thought her sweatpants were adorable with her boots, and Tanner said she would be right back as she walked out. He never even heard her.

"Hey," he whispers with a smile.

He pulls a bouquet of white roses out from behind his back and her eyes light up, almost always in disbelief every time he remembered what she liked. Once he went to pick up some flowers for her before the Christmas fraternity formal in his senior year, and after he ordered red roses, the florist screwed up the order and got white. He took them anyway, and showed up at her dorm, hoping it would still be ok. She opened the old wooden door, revealing her stunning silver dress and gorgeous self. He couldn't believe she had agreed to go with him. It was their first date. He handed her the flowers and she was smiling the prettiest smile he had ever seen.

"How did you know I liked white roses?" She says in shock, loving the flawless flowers. They were absolutely perfect.

"Lucky guess," he shrugs and smiles.

He sighed with relief and lead her out the door and to his car, hardly able to contain his excitement. Fitz would never forget that night. He saw that same smile even today as she took the roses and buried her nose in them, inhaling their wonderful scent.

"I love you, Fitz," she tells him, catching him off guard. He knew she loved him, but with all that happened, they hadn't had a chance to really tell each other how much they did love and appreciate the other.

"I love you too," he replies, stroking her sweet smelling, gorgeous hair.

He hugged her close and she sighed, glad to be leaving here and going home with him. Tanner came back in with some crutches, had Fitz sign some papers, and let them go.

"You keep in touch and let me know how it goes," she reminds Tanner.

"I definitely will," Tanner nods, glad Mellie, a successful, powerful, yet normal woman, believed in her.

They smile and share a hug, Fitz curious as to what that's all about, and the guys follow behind them until they make it to the first floor. Mellie gets on her crutches and Lance stays behind them while Ben and Chris stand in front, shielding them from the dozen or so reporters and photographers. Mellie kept her head down and Fitz kept his hand on her lower back all the way to the truck, never looking at them once or speaking a single word. They didn't answer the dozens of questions being fired at them, and they didn't look at any of the flashing cameras.

He knew Jackson would handle this.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N**: So we get to meet Mellie's best friend and see all of their sarcasm. Hope you enjoy and feel free to leave a review.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>Mellie laid in their bed that cold Wednesday morning around 10:30, already wanting to be off bed rest. She was just thankful to be out of the hospital and that Jerry was gone for most of the day to play golf with his buddies. She didn't even reach for the remote to turn on the TV or pick up her newly bought copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. All she really wanted was a shower. But she knew that wouldn't happen since no one was home. Dr. Ryde said someone had to be home to help her take a sponge bath, go to the bathroom, get up, and even eat. Her orders were to stay in bed all day except to go to the bathroom. She was allowed to sit up three hours of the day and could even do some simple exercises. But it was all incredibly boring. Fitz had tried to get off again, but he was already way behind schedule. He promised her as soon as he got home they would do whatever she wanted and he would make dinner for her. She smiled at the thought of him being home, someone to talk to. She honestly believed she was healing. She thought maybe she would feel something again, maybe some intimacy would come back.<p>

Just as she closed her eyes, her phone rang, making her wonder who the hell could possibly be calling her this early. She didn't even look at the caller ID before answering, putting the cold phone up to her ear.

"Hello?" Mellie answers, a little annoyed.

"Girl, _please_ tell me you're awake," a familiar voice asks her.

"I'm awake, Jade. What's up?"

"Just wondering how soon I was coming over," she says, ready to hang out with Mellie.

Mellie smiled and laughed softly, always glad for her best friend. She met Jade when they first moved to Dallas two and a half years ago. She was 36 and working at the same law firm Mellie got hired by before Fitz was governor, and took Mellie under her wing. She was even with them when Fitz won the election. Mellie trusted her enough to stay up all last night and tell her everything, and Jade cared enough to take a sick day to be with her.

"Whenever you're ready. I'll call the guard and tell him to let you in the house," Mellie says, now excited. She would get to talk to another person and not be alone for the majority of the day.

"I'll be over in ten. Bye."

Jade hangs up and grabs her bag of surprises for the day and heads out the door.

* * *

><p>"The party has arrived!" Jade shouts in a playful voice as she walked in the front door.<p>

Mellie laughed as she heard Jade's voice echo throughout the house and her footsteps coming up the stairs. She walked into their bedroom with her purse and tote bag, setting it down and hugging her friend.

"I would _definitely_ say the party has arrived, what all did you bring with you?" Mellie asks, curious as to what Jade's definition of a party is.

"Not _that_ much stuff," Jade says with the wave of a hand.

She begins emptying the bag's contents on the plush comforter-covered bed, ready for a fun day.

"We got some new Xbox games, specifically GTA, we got DVDs for days, lunch, magazines, a snuggly blanket, hot chocolate, and an Amazon gift card," she says, laying it all out across the bed.

Mellie looked at everything on the bed in disbelief, six new games, ten movies, turkey sandwiches on wheat with salad and chocolate covered fruit for dessert, the latest issues of People, U.S. Weekly, Cosmo, even a Playgirl just for laughs, and a fuzzy pink blanket. Only her best friend would know her this well and come spend the day with her.

"So what first?" Jade asks with a smile.

"GTA V?" Mellie raises an eyebrow, already knowing her answer.

"You're on."

* * *

><p>Jade wakes up around five that afternoon under the warm, cozy pink blanket with Mellie, glad she got to keep her company for the day. She sits up and stretches, hearing the background music on the Xbox game still playing and noticing Mellie fell asleep with her controller still in hand. She laughs softly and gets up, cleaning up a little and hearing Jerry come in quietly downstairs. She was glad his bedroom was downstairs, far away from Mellie. She gathered their plates leftover from lunch and takes them down to the kitchen, running into Jerry making a fresh pot of coffee.<p>

"I wondered whose car was outside. Jade, right?" He asks, leaning back against the counter, crossing his tan arms.

"Yep. How have you been?" She asks, only to be polite, but keeping things short.

"I'm still alive and kicking. You?"

"Busy with work is all. Took a sick day today to come see Mel. Said she hasn't been feeling real great lately and I hadn't seen her for a while, so why not?" Jade shrugs and laughs slightly as she rinses off the white plates and puts them in the sink.

"That's awfully nice of you. I'm sure she enjoyed it," he smiles, cringing as he turns around grabs the hot pot of coffee, wondering how much she knows. Jade hears Mellie's cell phone ringing and runs upstairs to get it.

"Well, it was nice seeing you again," she says, walking out of the kitchen and toward the stairs to get the phone.

"Same to you," he says cheerfully, but his blood was already boiling.

Jade made it upstairs and snatched the phone off the nightstand just as Mellie sat up to reach for it. She leaned her head back against the oak headboard and sighed softly, hating her nap got interrupted and wishing Jade would just give her the phone.

"Jade, give it back-"

"Please?" Jade asks nicely, just wanting to have a little fun.

She looks down at the caller ID and sees it's only Fitz and would do no harm. Mellie rolls her eyes and shrugs, knowing she won't win this.

"It's just Fitz."

"Fine," Mellie agrees, hoping it would make her happy.

Jade smiles and flips her hair back, pressing answer with a smile.

"Hey baby, how was your day?" Fitz asks, putting it on speaker since he was driving home from work.

"It was great, now that you mention it," she said in a deeper voice, trying to keep her composure, "That was the best sex I have had in a long time-"

"_Who is this_?" Fitz asks, his heart beating faster, wondering who was with his wife. His ears began to turn red as anger built inside him.

"You know who this is," Jade teases.

Jade smiled at Mellie and sighed, throwing the phone to her. Mellie picked it up and heard a curious, angry Fitz on the other end.

"Look, I don't know who this is, but if you had sex with my wife, I will hunt your ass down and -"

"It was Jade teasing. She came over today and we had a good time," Mellie explains, cutting him off before things got serious.

Fitz breathed a huge sigh of relief and loosened his death grip on the steering wheel, glad to hear her voice and learn it was just Jade messing with him.

"Hey baby. I'm really glad she came over and y'all had fun. Is Jer back yet?" He asks, calming down.

"Unfortunately. How was your day?"

"Better now that I'm on the way home. Look, tell her she's welcome to stay for dinner if she wants. How does steak sound?" Fitz asks, ready to be home and out by the grill.

"That sounds wonderful. I'll tell Jerry to get the stuff out for you. I'll see you in a few minutes. Bye baby. Love you," Mellie says, ready to see him. She had missed his presence all day, and wanted nothing more than to just cuddle with him tonight.

"Love you too, Mels. Bye," he says, hanging up and finishing the drive home.

She puts the phone down after texting Jerry and Jade sits back down beside her, enjoying this not going to work thing.

"He said we're having steak for dinner and you're welcome to stay," Mellie says, leaning back against the pile of pillows anxiously.

"I don't want to intrude or anything. It's been a long day for him and I'm sure he doesn't want-"

"How do you like your steak?" Mellie asks bluntly, and Jade knew where this was going. They wouldn't let her say no.

"Medium well."

They both laugh, enjoying being together and understanding each other easily. They haven't gotten to do this much since Fitz became governor, and they didn't realize how much they missed it until now.

"Need me to do anything for dinner?" Jade asks, knowing it was the least she could do as their guest.

Mellie gave her a sarcastic look as she rolled her eyes, knowing she was about to sound stupid.

"...watch me walk from here to the bathroom to wash off before he gets here. Doctor's orders someone is with me when I get up. Apparently I could be a fall risk or something like that."

Jade contemplated her request, pretending to be bothered with it.

"I don't know, Mels. That's a pretty tough job."

Mellie gives her a rather serious look and sighs, enjoying her playing along.

"Look, if you're not up for the job...I understand."

They both burst into laughter over their sarcasm, something that stuck ever since they met. Jade made sure she was settled in the bathroom and began to clean up the beautiful room and make the king-sized bed, loving the plush feather pillows. She couldn't even begin to imagine how Mellie was feeling, how this was on Fitz, everything. She heard the iron gate open outside and went to the window to see Fitz pulling up in his truck and parking it behind her car, then coming inside.

"Hey Jade, will you get my gray undershirt and green sweater out of the closet please?" Mellie yells from the bathroom, wiping off quickly and washing her face.

"Yeah, sure," she says.

Jade snapped out of it and went over to the closet, getting her sweater and grabbing her a pair of jeans out of the dresser and laying them on the bed for her. Mellie came out of the bathroom seconds later in her gray towel after her quick sponge bath and Jade realized she should give her some privacy.

"I'm going to fix my hair real quick," she says, starting toward the bathroom. "Oh, and Fitz just got here."

"I better get back in bed before he gets up here," Mellie sighs, hating being confined to this bed for hours on end.

Jade went into the master bathroom and shut the door, leaning against it for a second, then going to fix her hair. She looked around the room, taking it all in, the rough white floor tiles, the double sinks and dressing room lights above the mirror, a jacuzzi tub and separate shower, granite countertops, even the toilet had its own little closed in space. She straightened her shirt out and brushed her wavy hair, hoping she looks decent considering they laid in bed all day. She opens the door and sees Mellie putting on a bracelet as she lies back down, having rolled up her jeans to her ankles and put her hair up in a messy ponytail.

"Well, aren't you all dressed up and cute? Got a hot date or something?" Jade asks with a smirk, her hands resting on her hips.

"You know it," Mellie says sassily.

"So what's this mystery guy's name?" She teases.

"You might know him. His name is Fitz," she smiles bashfully, readjusting her bracelet.

"Hmm. The name does sound familiar," Jade admits, crossing her arms and pretending to figure out where she heard the name from.

Fitz knocks and opens the wooden bedroom door with a smile, his gray leather bag still over his wide shoulder, cell phone in hand.

"Did I hear something about a hot date?" He asks curiously.

"Yeah, his name is Fitz," Jade says. "I think he and I need to have a word, considering he knocked up my best friend and I just found out yesterday," she smiles, trying to hold back her laughter.

Mellie bursts into a giggle, loving the look on Fitz's face when he was caught off guard.

He laughs and sets his stuff down, turning his phone on silent and leaving it on the dresser, then going to give Jade a hug.

"Long time no see. It's good to see you, Jade."

"You too, Fitz. How is being governor treating you?" She asks.

"It has its advantages and disadvantages. But it's been pretty good," he admits.

He goes over to Mellie and gives her a kiss, glad to see her, glad to feel her touch. After being with her four straight days all day, it was hard being without her.

"You look nice," he whispers softly into her ear, his hot breath tickling her skin.

"It's just an old sweater," she shrugs slightly with a small grin on her face.

"Well, I like it. You ready to go downstairs?"

"Can I _please_ walk myself?" Mellie begs, longing to stretch her legs.

Fitz smiles and shakes his head no slightly, holding up a hand like he was giving an oath.

"Doctor's orders."

Mellie smiles and laughs as he picks her up, him wondering if he's just strong or if she really is that light. He carries her downstairs with Jade behind them, leading them to the backyard patio. He sets her down in one of the cushioned pool chairs and gets another for Jade, then lights the fire pit.

Fitz went inside and marinated the steaks, then brought them and a cold beer outside and put them on the grill. He sat down with the girls and warmed his hands up, enjoying themselves until Jerry stepped out.

Everything suddenly got quiet for everyone.

Mellie's heart fluttered at the sight of him, wishing she could run away right now, as fast as she could, and as far away as she could get from him. She felt a slight chill, and felt like it was only her and him out there, him waiting to make his next move on her.

Jerry knew they knew something. How much, he would have to find out.

Mellie knew from then on out that tensions would be high for the rest of the night.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N**: Another tough day for the Grants. Thanks for reading.

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>Fitz puts his jeans on and searches through the closet that Friday afternoon for a t-shirt, trying to clear his mind. All he can think about is what's going through Mellie's head right now. What she could possibly be thinking, how she could be feeling.<p>

She had agreed to talk with a specialist today, only if it wasn't in public or at the mansion. She did it only to make him feel better; she had her own means of coping other than therapy. He turned around and looked around their dimly lit bedroom. The soft gray walls, the plush white carpet, the fluffy blue bed, the antique oak chest of drawers, the polka dot lamp that Mellie loved and he despised, everything in the room seemed to stand out and speak to him. He was completely there, had all this power, but could do nothing. He felt like he was helpless, useless, like he had let her down, and he couldn't get past this feeling. His heart felt like it was sinker deeper and deeper in his body, moving from his chest to the pit of his stomach. He quit looking at his dress shirts and pulls out a gray v-neck with light blue long sleeves and puts it on, smoothing it out over his toned body.

He shuts the white closet door and hears the bathroom door open slowly. He turns around to see Mellie with a dark gray cotton towel wrapped around her, startled when she sees him. He pushes the door up more when their eyes meet and he sighs, not even remembering hearing the shower cut off. He knows she can't handle him seeing her, and decides to give her some privacy.

"I'll be in the hall, ok?" Fitz says, his heart shattered.

"Fitz, _please_…" she begged, not wanting him to go, but unable to let him stay. This was killing her inside.

Her swollen eyes fill with tears again, wishing it didn't hurt her so badly for him to see her like this, even covered up.

_'This isn't how it's supposed to be,_' she thought.

She knew married couples were supposed to be able to love wholly, simply, be able to see each other both clothed and naked, and love. But she couldn't let him see how hideous she was. She couldn't hurt him like that. She can't even stand the pain when he comes near her anymore. She shook her head in disapproval, hating it was this back and forth game. One day she wouldn't let go of him, needing him to do everything with her, to be by her side every second of the day. The next, she couldn't even speak to him, much less look in his direction.

"It's ok. I promise," he says, trying to be reassuring.

"I just… I want to…" she says, still fighting tears, her voice breaking.

"I know, baby. I'll wait outside," he whispers understandingly.

Fitz goes out into the hall and shuts the cherry wooden door, leaning against it and closing his heavy eyes. He sighs, tired of pretending each and every day that it doesn't bother him, but they both knew it did. He desired to touch her again, to show her how much he loved her in her entirety. He wanted to be able to love her more both physically and emotionally, but even small compliments and hand holding are too much for her to bear these days. He hears Jerry's heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and opens his eyes, seeing him start down the hall towards the upstairs office. Fitz's eyes meet his at the same time as he goes after him, causing him to stop dead in his tracks. Fitz scoffs disgustedly, hating his own father more now than ever, wishing he was dead and feeling terrible for it. He had never wanted that for anyone before. Jerry realizes in that moment that Fitz knows about that night and goes back downstairs quickly, ready to confront Mellie about this later.

Mellie comes out of the bathroom upon hearing the bedroom door close, still wrapped in her fluffy towel. She put on her light gray straight leg jeans and her favorite cream-colored sweater, slipping on her brown leather jacket over it. She puts on her warm sheepskin boots and sits down on the edge of the bed, remembering that night. She wished her anger towards Jerry didn't naturally come out towards her husband. He didn't deserve any of it. Tears start running down her face, desperate for control of her own life again, for some kind of help.

Fitz cracks the door to their room a few minutes later and opens it slowly, finding her sobbing quietly on the bed with her back to him. He steps in and shuts the door, and she gets up, wiping her eyes like nothing happened, and turns around.

"I'm sorry, I forgot you were out there — " she says, standing up quickly, wiping her tears and straightening out her shirt.

"It's fine," he says, walking slowly in the room.

"Just let me do my hair and I'll be ready to go," she says quietly, knowing this is weird for him too.

She goes back into the bathroom to dry and fix her hair, leaving the door slightly open. He watches through the crack, sighing and feeling like his heart is breaking into a million pieces as he sits down on the edge of bed. The bedroom phone rings and startles him, causing him to reach for it quickly. He rests his elbow on his knee as he answers, hoping it's nothing important.

"Fitzgerald Grant," he sighs, slightly annoyed.

"I'm sorry for calling on a Friday afternoon, sir, but the Lieutenant Governor is here and says he needs your take on the updated Coast Guard budget for his address tomorrow," Mike explains hurriedly.

Fitz sighs, knowing his Chief of Staff isn't purposely trying to bother him and is just helping, but wishes he hadn't called. He just dislikes being bothered on his time off with petty questions that he knows Mike knows the answer to.

"It's a beginning step in the right direction to help keep our sea borders safe and keep illegal aliens out. The Coast Guard saves lives every day, and without them, we would not be able to function as easily as we do today. Higher paychecks and lower healthcare rates is the least we can do for them," he fires back into the phone.

"Thank you, sir," Mike says, extremely appreciative.

"You're welcome, Mike."

Fitz hangs up and lies back on the bed, closing his eyes and listening to the humming of the hairdryer. He's ready to meet with the psychiatrist and start getting his wife help. They can't keep living like this.

_His wife._

That word always appealed to him, always made him smile. He was bonded to her by love and in spirit, she was his and he was hers, for now and eternity. He was ready to do anything he had to to keep her safe and make sure she was loved.

He hears the dryer cut off a few minutes later and he sits up, rubbing his eyes. Mellie comes out of the bathroom and turns the light off, walking by him to get her purse. He doesn't stare at her as not to make her uncomfortable, but he longed to be able to admire her beauty and hold her again soon.

"You ready?" He asks softly, not trying to rush her. He knew she didn't want to do this.

"As ready as I'll ever be," she says, almost in a depressed tone.

She follows him downstairs after refusing to let him carry her again, and as they get in the truck, he notices she seems sad. More depressed than she has been, maybe it's because she's been in the house all week, he didn't know. He just knew something wasn't right. He cranks up and gets the heat going, then starts the thirty-minute drive back home in silence. Mellie stares out the window, all she can hear is Jerry's sick voice playing over and over again in her head. Fitz can tell she's deep in thought, and knows he has to help her before she sinks deep into depression.

"You ok?" He asks with concern.

Mellie closes her eyes and her body shivers, still cold, taking his free hand.

"Yeah." She lies. "Just thinking."

"So what would you like to do tonight when we get home?"

"I don't know, what did you have in mind?" She asks.

"I thought we could sit by the fireplace, pick out some baby stuff, maybe look at some outfits for the annual Donors Dinner at the university next week," he looks at her with a smile.

"You're kidding," she says in disbelief, her eyes lighting up. She loved to get dressed up for events and was past due to get out of house for a little while.

"Nope. They called a month ago and asked if we would be the guests of honor and say a few words. Dr. Ryde already cleared it and said you could go for a few days," he says happily.

"That's awesome, Fitz. I can't believe you kept it a secret from me this long," she laughs softly.

She smiles and punches his arm lightly, getting a grin out of him. He turns on the radio and they listen to some music all the way to the house. He parks in the driveway and is glad they got there before the therapist did. He grabs his leather bag out of the backseat of the truck and helps Mellie out, then leads them inside.

He plugs up the coffee pot and starts making a pot when he hears the therapist come in the front door.

"Hey, we're in the kitchen, be right there," he yells, headed to the door.

Fitz walks out of the kitchen and sees Dr. Penn in the living room, meeting Mellie. She's dressed in a gray pantsuit and pure white button down shirt, setting her black Prada bag on the couch beside her. He goes up to her and shakes her hand, surprised by her firm grip. He suddenly felt a little underdressed in his jeans compared to her.

"Fitzgerald Grant, nice to meet you in person, Dr. Penn," he introduces himself.

"Same to you, Mr. Grant," she says with a smile.

"Fitz just put on some coffee, it should be done soon. Just make yourself comfortable," Mellie tells her, wanting to keep this casual.

"Thank you. Whenever you're ready to start, we'll start," Dr. Penn says, sitting down across from Mellie, pulling out her notepad, pen, and tape recorder.

Fitz's eyes meet Mellie's in that instant, and to his surprise, he doesn't feel distance between them this time; he feels strength. He knows her question and goes over to her, sitting beside her to reassure her. He puts his arm around her and leans in, whispering in her ear.

"If you want to do this alone, you know it's ok. If you want me to stay, I will," he whispers, his arm gently squeezing her side.

"I want you to be here but...I have to do this alone. Get over this myself. I need... that closure," she says softly, a lump forming in her throat.

"Ok baby. I'll be upstairs if you need me," he says.

He gives her a quick kiss on the cheek and takes his bag, going upstairs to get some work done.

Who was he kidding, he wasn't getting anything done. He was too busy thinking of how to get rid of Jerry. They had to get their hands on those drugs. He went into their old bedroom, opening the door to find their former love shack, setting his bag on the bed and unzipping it. He pulls out his government-issued badge and pistol, putting in a magazine and loading it, missing his old job.

He missed the adrenaline rush, the feeling of constantly being watched, the satisfaction of completing a mission.

He missed the excitement.

He sat on the bed, putting the gun and badge up, looking through the papers he had brought along, then shoving them back in the bag. All he had done today was going through briefings and papers; he had had enough. He checked the time on his phone - 4:30. He put it on silent and laid back, closing his eyes, quickly dozing off.

* * *

><p>Fitz opened his eyes groggily, awakened by two things: his slight hunger and the sound of quiet sobs, then laughter. He wakes up enough to stand and looks at his phone, seeing it's 9:15. He throws it on the bed and stands at the top of the stairs, finding Mellie and Dr. Penn talking and laughing, giving him a sense of relief. He decides to not disturb them, knowing they'll tell him when they're done. He goes back into their room and sits on the bed, feeling rested for the first time in weeks.<p> 


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N**: I hope you enjoyed the last chapter, and thank you for reading. Feel free to leave a comment or review! There are only two more chapters left to upload, and I just want to thank everyone who read this story or left a comment. It means so much to me to know that someone enjoyed what I have written, so thank you.

I understand everyone's feelings towards wanting dialogue between Mellie and Dr. Penn. Out of respect for sexual assault survivors, I feel like I cannot even begin to understand that frame of thought after an attack and did not want to attempt and potentially disrespect a scene like that. Thank you for being understanding.

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>His phone lights up thirty minutes later with a text from Mellie, saying they were finished. He opens his bag, pulling out $3,000 for Dr. Penn, both of them preferring cash instead of a transfer. This way there was no evidence of this ever happening on file.<p>

"Thank you, Dr. Penn," he says gratefully, glad Mellie agreed to talk with her.

"Glad I could help, Mr. Grant. Don't hesitate to call if you need me. I'll be here same time on Tuesday," she says sincerely, happy to help.

He opens the front door for her as she put on her jacket and picked up her bag again. He extended his hand for her to shake it, getting a rather firm handshake back, surprising him.

"See you then," he says with a smile.

He closes the door behind her and starts toward the living room, seeing Mellie sit on the couch with a smile. He goes to her and sits down, putting his arm around her.

"I assume things went well," he says, pulling her into his warm side, her not hesitating.

"It did. I'm sorry we took so long-" She tries to apologize, but he refuses to let her apologize for being helped.

"It wasn't long at all. You want to get something to eat on the way home?" He suggests, hating to go back, but they didn't have any clothes left here to change into.

"Sure. The Sandlot?" She raises an eyebrow, snuggling up next to him.

"It's like you read my mind," he laughs.

They smile simultaneously and he gives her a kiss on the check, wrapping his arm around her.

"Let me get my stuff together and we can go."

He goes upstairs, gathering his things and packing his bag again, and going back downstairs, ready to go home and relax with his wife. As they got in the truck and started home, Mellie closed her eyes with a tiny smile. She felt like a new person, like she was on top of the world, like she might be normal again soon.

Like she might _love_.

* * *

><p>"I like that one. Or that one too," he says happily, loving anything that she would wear. He stretches his legs out as they lay by the fireplace.<p>

Fitz pointed to the formal gowns on the screen as Mellie scrolled through pages of fancy dresses online for the dinner next week. She was excited. She would get to dress up for the first time in forever, to go out and have a good time with Fitz. She stopped at a dark red gown that draped the floor and a poofy white one that stopped right below her knees.

"Is your tux black or gray?" She asks, knowing the color mattered more to her than to him.

"Dark gray, matching bow tie and shoes. I personally like that blue one," he points out, snuggling up to her closer, glad they were able to do this again.

She stops at a short sleeved blue gown with a white ribbon at the waist, and flowy blue feathers on the skirt. The v-shaped neckline was perfect for the necklace she had in mind. Her gray heels would match it well.

"It's perfect," she whispers.

Fitz pulls out his credit card, handing it to her to order her stunning dress. He couldn't wait to see her in it.

"It really is beautiful," he says. "You'll look amazing."

She orders it quickly and sets the computer down, seeing it's already 11 and yawning. They had been going hard at it all week, and they were both exhausted. She leans back against his body, closing her eyes and feeling good about everything. It was a strange, unfamiliar feeling to her now, but good.

Painful good.

"Me too, baby. You want to go to bed?" He asks, not sure if he could stay up another thirty minutes.

"Let's just lay here a little longer," she says softly, laying on her side.

Fitz smiles as she gets comfortable on some pillows and he turns on his side, facing her, kissing her forehead gently.

"I love you," he whispers, meaning every bit of it.

Mellie stares deep into his now crystal blue eyes, loving how they could change from the sexy slate to sparkling blue in seconds. He could feel her warmth again, ready to welcome her with open arms. She leans in closely and closes her eyes, her lips meeting his at the same time, loving his taste, truly loving _this_ for the first time in months. She wraps her arms around his neck and doesn't stop him as he rests his hands on her lower back and hips, enjoying this moment. He knew he couldn't take it too far, that she was still recovering from Jerry's incident and her surgery, but he wasn't going to let this moment go to waste. Her tongue met his and they kissed each other harder, deeper than they had before. She was loving this, and desired to do more, upset she couldn't. He repositioned to lie flat on his back as they continued kissing, and she threw her right leg over his body, pulling herself onto him and caressing his face, trying not to let the sharpshooting pain between her legs get to her. She kissed his neck slowly, her hot breath sending chills down his spine as she left her mark on him. He closed his eyes, one hand playing in her sweet curls, the other moving down her back, his fingers dancing down her body, his hand gripping the back of her jeans covered thigh, gently pulling her closer to him, when her whimper pulled him out of his love-induced trance.

"Fitz, stop," she whispers, pushing him back. "I'm sorry. I pulled something."

She stretches her legs back out, knowing she's overdone it now. He continues to hold her close, loving the feeling of her warm, curvy body against his rugged frame. He kisses her cheeks, moving to her jawline, down to her neck, loving the way her soft skin felt against his lips. After showing her neck some love, he moved back up to her lips, biting them gently, then kissing her long and hard for a few minutes, reaching every inch of her mouth with his tongue, letting her know he still loved her as much as he did when they met.

"I love you too," she tells him, actually able to say it with meaning and love, actually able to say it for the first time since that night.

She got up and was almost too sore to walk as she gathered the pillows and put them back on the couches. Fitz got up and snuck up behind her, scooping her up into his arms and whisking her off to the downstairs guest room. She giggled as he opened the door, turning on the lights to reveal he had moved everything downstairs to this room so she wouldn't have to go up the stairs anymore. He even moved the TV and Xbox downstairs, and had Grand Theft Auto already on and waiting for them.

"You know me all too well," she smiled, resting her head on his broad shoulder.

He pulled the gray feather comforter back and set her down on the bed gently, helping her get her gray tank top and pink pajama pants on. He took her shirt off as she took her pants off, and never flinched, never asked him to leave. She didn't mind. He knew she was beginning to heal. As he leaned in and kissed the top of her head, she laid back into her fluffy pillows. He took off his shirt and pants, leaving on only his boxers, and threw their clothes in the hamper.

"Need me to do anything else for you?" He asks.

"Could you get me some ice please? I clearly overdid it today," she asks.

She chuckles softly and he smiles, going to the kitchen and fixing her a small bag of ice, wrapping it in a hand towel before taking it back to her. He crawls into bed beside her, grabbing a controller when he heard her gasp quietly, the ice still cold through the towel as she situated it between her legs.

"I swear, I'm not leaving this bed all weekend. I refuse to move," she groans softly.

Fitz's thoughts drifted elsewhere upon hearing those words, wanting to take off her clothes and show her how much he loved her. He remembered their honeymoon to France, landing on a Friday, going to their hotel and making love all weekend, not once leaving. They finally recovered and got out Monday afternoon to explore the city. He wanted it to be like that again. He wanted to tell her his thoughts, but he knew he better back off.

"You want to play?" He suggests, nodding to the TV.

"Let's just go to sleep. But tomorrow, you're on. All morning," she smiles, nudging his arm.

"Definitely," he grins, kissing her forehead.

He smiles and relaxes, turning off the lamp, the only light in the room being the moonlight peeking through the window blinds. She snuggled up close to him, kissing his neck and chin again, wanting this as bad as he did. She didn't want to let on that she did, but she knew she was ready. She focused on his slow, husky breathing and quickly fell asleep, glad to be this close to him again.

* * *

><p>Fitz couldn't tell if this was a dream or not. He had always wished for this moment, dreamed of it, fantasized about it. He lay there on their king sized bed, nothing between his bare body and the sheets. He tried to open his eyes but realized he was blindfolded. The moment he tried to take it off, the cold metal handcuffs around his wrists dug deep into his skin. He huffed, realizing his ankles were loosely restrained too. The second he questioned the location of his wife, he heard her heels clacking against the waxed wooden floor.<p>

"Mellie?" He asked, his breathing heavy.

"Be quiet, Fitzgerald," she said in a sexy, demanding tone.

Fitz closed his mouth and swallowed hard, her stern tone telling him he'd better obey. The sound of her heels got closer and closer, only getting quiet when she climbed onto the bed, straddling his hips, slowing grinding on him. He longed to hold her hips, caress her body as he squirmed, trying to get free.

"That'll only make it worse, baby," she said sultrily, the feeling of his manhood against her already turning her on.

Her sweet yet serious tone halted him as she inched her way forward until she was sitting on his firm chest in nothing but her black lacy lingerie. His breathing became erratic as she kissed him, biting his lip and sucking his neck. He needed to touch her, to feel her body intertwined with his. He already began to sweat, it trickling down his face and back. He was weak. He loved when she took control in the bedroom, but he would never admit it and ruin the fun. He was almost always the one in charge, and he knew that was how she liked it. She liked his commands, the feeling of his strong fingers dancing across her body, his warm, teasing breath, his hot skin touching hers. Every inch of him turned her on. But Fitz knew he was in luck the first time she took charge, the third time they had gotten intimate. He had always been attracted to her Southern charm and intelligence, but the minute she talked dirty to him, he was done for. The second the door closed, the lady in the streets was gone, and she became his freak in the sheets. It was their little secret, and she knew it drove him wild. She could feel his body tensing up and she smiled, knowing this was killing him. She pushed his blindfold back, uncovering his gorgeous eyes as she stared sultrily in them. Fitz couldn't believe his eyes, she had him at a loss for words.

"Mellie-" he whispers, unable to say anything else.

"Tell me what you want," she demands, placing her hands on either side of the pillow, leaning over him.

Fitz sighed softly and smiled, shaking his head slightly, knowing he wouldn't be released without complying. She could be a demanding bitch in the bedroom, and he _loved_ it.

"I- I want you," he choked out, needing her at this point. "I _need_ you."

"And?" She asks, knowing his answer.

"Please. _Please release me," _he moans, needing to feel her touch, needing to feel her body against hers, needing to be inside of her.

She grinned slightly and reached into her bra, pulling out a tiny handcuff key. He watches intently as she leans over his body, unlocking his left hand. She dropped the key as soon as his hand was free; it rushed towards her body, ready for the attack. He pulled her body flat on top of his, kissing her hard and holding her shoulder. He slowly rubs all over her back, teasing her, grabbing hold of her ass and grinding her hips into his, letting her feel his growing erection. He feels her moan softly into his warm neck and he bites her lip gently, sucking on it, knowing he was going to get his way. He was going to have his way with her. He held on to her hips and moved her back and forth, closer to his lips each time.

"_Release me,"_ he demands impatiently.

His growling commands were too much for her. She scrambled to pick up the key off the cold hardwood floor and didn't hesitate to free his right hand. He jerked out of the handcuffs quickly and lunged forward, taking her entire body in his arms, unable to get enough of her. He reached around her small figure as she left her scent on his neck as she kissed him, untying his feet without any problem. To his surprise, he already felt her body shaking, trembling with need. He knew she needed him. It just usually took her longer to figure this out.

His nails dug down her back, her grip on his forearms tightening as her legs wrapped around his waist. He unhooked her lacy bra and she got it off and threw it across the room, all in one swift motion as he started to kiss and caress her firm breasts. She arched her back, trying to get closer and closer to him as his carnivorous eyes glared up at her. His hand tilted her head downward, knowing she couldn't handle watching him move down her body, inch by inch, slowly leaving sexy kisses everywhere. Her heart was pounding, her breathing unsteady, already losing control of her body. He got out from under her and spread her out across the bed, running his strong hand up and down her core, causing her to moan softly.

"Fitz..." She moaned, arching her back, his touch making her weak. He could tell by her shallow pants that she couldn't handle much more.

"_Tell me_. Tell me you want it."

He smirked as his fingers traced back down her stomach, going dangerously low before stopping, loving driving her crazy. He knew she wanted it. He just needed to know how badly she needed it. He smiled as he watched her panting body tremble, her eyes closed tightly, barely able to speak a word. He traced gentle lines up and down between her hot thighs, teasing her, already knowing she was done for. She was too close and any move would send her over the edge.

"Fuck, Fitz, why would you even ask that, you know I want you to-"

He tore through the thin fabric with ease, his tongue slipping inside her, loving how wet she was. He hungrily enjoyed her taste and her quick gasps and moans. He went deeper and harder when he heard his wife yelling his name, it sounding so sexy coming from her lips. He smirked happily, knowing he had done his job. But he was quickly interrupted, hearing a faint ringing in the background that slowly got louder and louder by the second.

Fitz woke up in a sweat, his phone on the nightstand ringing. He saw it was nine and wondered who was calling this early on a Saturday-that was unusual. As he reached for the phone, he felt the hardness in his boxers and groaned softly. He picked up the phone and rolled his eyes, wondering which problem he should deal with first-Jerry or his intense morning wood.

"Hello?" Fitz sighs.

"Why the hell am I just now hearing about you and Mellie going to the hospital and why did I have to hear it from my friends at the country club? What happened?" Jerry yells angrily into the phone, sitting in his Mustang in the country club parking lot, twenty minutes from the mansion.

"I'll explain when you get back," Fitz says.

"You got twenty minutes until I'm there," Jerry growls, hanging up and starting the car.

Fitz groans, putting his phone back, seeing his wife sleeping peacefully beside him. He didn't have the heart to wake her up and ask her to help him out, no matter how badly he wanted to. He gets out of bed and goes into the bathroom, turning on the shower, sadly having to deal with this all by himself.

* * *

><p>Fitz came out of the bathroom, his brown curls still wet, and went through the small closet, looking for a shirt. He pulled out an old gray t-shirt and slipped it on, then put on some old torn jeans of his. He knew it was going to be a long day dealing with everything and he wanted to be comfortable. He turned around and saw Mellie sleeping peacefully under the warm covers, glad she was safe with him around. He smiled and grabbed his phone off the dresser, taking a quick picture before putting it in his back pocket. He slipped on his fuzzy gray slippers and heard the front door open, knowing it was Jerry by the angry, loud footsteps. It quickly slammed shut, shaking the entire first floor, and making Fitz cringe. Mellie turned over and propped herself up on her elbow, wondering what was going on. She looked at the clock and saw it was nine; she knew this much commotion this early was never good.<p>

"Fitz, what's all the noise about-"

Fitz crawled onto the bed and kissed her forehead, putting his arm around her. He didn't want her worrying about a thing yet.

"Jerry's upset, ok? Just lie back down. I'm going to handle it, it will be ok," he said softly to her, stroking her curls. He quickly stopped as Jerry came busting in, yelling and waving around a few rolled up magazines in his hand.

"_What the hell is this?_" He roared, throwing the magazines down in front of them, his face red hot. Fitz skimmed the cover of each one quickly-they were all about The Queen and their trip to the hospital. Someone had gotten pictures of Mellie and Jerry at The Queen, and of her and Tyler leaving. That same someone got shots of Fitz and Mellie going in the hospital. By this time, Fitz was already angry. Mellie picked one up and her heart sank.

_'We're good people, we don't deserve this, to have our image ruined. God, this is all my fault,'_ she thought.

Each headline cut like a knife for both of them - one saying she had alcohol poisoning, the next saying she had a wild night at the club, another saying Jerry got a prostitute, she was cheating on Fitz, she was addicted to drugs, Fitz wanted a divorce, the list went on and on for days.

Fitz physically held back his anger while in front of Mellie, but he was ready to let it out the second he got out of her sight. He glanced over at her as she continued reading the lies. She looked like she was going to be sick. Tears already filled her eyes.

"Why the hell didn't you have security with you? Why were you two even at the damn hospital that night?" Jerry questioned, wanting answers.

"Look, let's talk about this in a little while, please-" Fitz said, getting up off the bed and trying to reason with his father. He didn't want to get Mellie any more upset at this point.

"_In a little while we'll have our asses handed to us! _The lines are flooded with calls, and there's a herd of reporters at the gate," he huffs, throwing down the last magazine in his hand on the bed.

Mellie slowly crawled out of the bed, leaving the now melted bag of ice behind, and made her way to the bathroom just feet away. She slammed the door shut and sat on the cold tile floor, her body shaking, her nerves all worked up. She had never let things like this bother her in the past. They didn't really bother her now. The only thing that bothered her about this bad publicity was that it just tied her to Jerry. Every bit of it was linked to him or caused by him. She never would've gone out to the club if it wasn't for him, if they didn't need those drugs he bought. She was only there to keep watch. She never would've ended up in the hospital if he hadn't forced himself on her.

Fitz forcibly showed Jerry out of their room and into the living room. He knew Mellie was upset, but he had to handle his father first. They sat on the couch, turning on the tv and seeing the pictures on the local news.

"Will you please just calm down for ten seconds and _let me talk_-" Fitz raises his voice, now that he was alone with Jerry.

"How can I calm down about this, Fitz? There's pictures of me leaving with that girl, pictures of you and Mellie going in the hospital and walking out, accusations everywhere. Why were you there? _What happened?_" Jerry raises his voice, his face turning red. Fitz couldn't believe this.

Fitz's blood began to boil. He took a deep breath and stood up from the couch and began to pace.

"Damn it Jerry, just shut up! I don't know what happened with you and that poor girl, and I don't really ever care to know. That's your business. All I see is pictures of you wasted that night with this girl. All these misleading pictures of Mellie and I? That was me _taking care of my wife_. She left The Queen because she knew it wasn't safe. She was doing the right thing. We ended up at the hospital that morning. I know you raped her, you _sick bastard_," Fitz growled, almost in tears. What kind of a man would rape a lady?

Jerry's anger never left, his facial expression never changing. He couldn't lose this argument to his son.

"She had a nightmare about the night you destroyed her and when she woke up, she was bleeding profusely. The first thing that came to my mind was the baby," Fitz exhaled sharply, still angry with him over that night. He rested his head in his hand, trying to gather his thoughts.

Jerry sighed as the color drained from his face. He had no idea she was pregnant. He always dreamed of meeting his grandchildren one day.

"Yeah, we found out she was pregnant last week. You're lucky the baby is mine and not yours, I would have your head on a stick if that child wasn't mine. I thought she had miscarried. I got her to the hospital, they cleaned her up and told us the baby was fine. They found a second degree tear that looked to be about seven weeks old and was trying to heal itself, but ruptured. She was dehydrated and stressed."

He paused, trying to catch his breath, more angry now than before. He remembered what Mellie had said: it was a power thing. If he told his father she told someone she was raped, he would go after her. He couldn't let that happen. His father was too calm. This wasn't good.

"They stitched it up and put her on bed rest for two months. Jackson said the story was she fell and hurt her knee," Fitz said, inching closer to Jerry, getting in his face.

"_None_ of this would have happened if it wasn't for you. This is all your fucking fault, forcing yourself on _my _wife, taking away her innocence, causing her so much stress and pain that she had to be hospitalized. You're a sick man, Jerry. You're not even worthy of being called a man. You're just _trash_."

"You better watch your mouth, Fitz. You know what I'm capable of. I'll have your ass out of office in a heartbeat. And it's a shame that she had to be put in the hospital for _minor issues_," Jerry said, not worried one bit about any of this. He would always win.

He stood up and moved closer to his son, inches away from his fire-red face. Fitz couldn't believe it - Jerry thought raping Mellie was a "minor issue"? He was ready to kill him. He _hated_ him.

"She always flirted with me. You aren't even half the man I am, Fitzgerald. I just wanted to show her how a real man was. She was practically _begging_ on her hands and knees for me. She wanted it-"

Fitz let out a loud grunt as his clenched fist slammed into his father's jaw, the cracking sound filling the room. Jerry took a few steps back and Fitz swung again, aiming for his nose, barely missing when Jerry moves and gets his eye instead. Jerry took a deep breath and stared into his son's cold eyes, both exchanging looks of hatred. He grabbed Fitz's arm and twisted it behind his back before he knew what hit him, putting him in a headlock.

"Oh, you really blew it now, son," Jerry said through his clenched teeth. "I will _always_ be two steps ahead of you. _Always_. You better watch your back and _especially_ hers," he growled, emphasizing her, making Fitz's blood boil.

He tightened his grip and Fitz's face scrunched up in pain, not making a sound. He couldn't let on the amount of pain that was going through his body right now. Jerry let go and pushed him to the ground, grabbing his car keys and walking out the door in anger. Fitz picked himself up off the floor, seeing the bruise already forming on his forearm, ready to fight. He was ready to strangle Jerry with his bare hands. He brushed himself off and then remembered Mellie.

He walked into the guest room and reached for the bathroom doorknob, realizing it was locked. Mellie tried to catch her breath, pulling herself together as she got up and leaned against the door. Fitz could hear her shaky pants through the wooden door and sighed quietly.

"It's me, Mels," he says. "He's gone."

Mellie sighed softly and closed her eyes, unlocking the door, letting him in. She sat down on the edge of the bathtub, recovering from her anxiety attack. She propped her elbows on her knees, one hand on her forehead, trying to block everything out, the other wrapped around her core, clenching the side of her tank top. Fitz sat down on the toilet beside her, rubbing her shoulder. She looked up and saw his black eye and bruised arm, wondering what the hell just happened.

"Fitz, what just happened out there?" She asks, giving him an angry look as she reached for his face.

"Don't worry about it, baby. I handled him. He won't get near you again," Fitz assures her.

She shook her head and sighed, throwing her hands up, then burying her face in them again. If she didn't feel so bad, so would go confront Jerry about this right now.

"Need me to do anything for you?" He asks.

"Just...no. Not now," she said meekly.

She closed her eyes and he could tell she was tired and felt bad. The baby hadn't affected her much until now, and he knew when she was sick, she wanted to be left alone. He kissed the top of her head and stood up, rubbing her back momentarily.

"I hope you feel better, Mels. Holler if you need me," he says softly, hating to leave her like this, but knew it was what she wanted.

He left her alone and made his way to his office, picking up his bag off the floor behind his desk, and getting out his still loaded gun. He set it on the desk, going to the front window and looking out, seeing all the reporters had left with Jerry. He went back into his office, picking up his gun again. He held it carefully, stroking the side, putting on his jacket and going out onto the back patio. He stood at the edge of the concrete, aiming back into the nearby trees. The neighbors were too far away to hear or care. He would shoot his guns if he wanted. He was certified.

The loud shot rang out through the trees and the house, the crow falling straight to the ground with a quiet thud. He quickly aimed and hit another midair, knowing he still had it. He missed his assignments terribly.

But that's what he gave up to be governor.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N**: Things are moving pretty quickly now for Fitz and Mellie, hopefully in a good way. Thanks for reading and feel free to leave a review! Only one more chapter left.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>Fitz dragged into the kitchen around five that afternoon after checking on Mellie, who was finally sleeping again after that morning's events. He opened the top cabinet above the stove fan, reaching in and grabbing out a half full bottle of vodka. He doesn't get a glass, not even drinking enough to need one. He takes the cap off and takes a few drinks, liking the feel of the burning in his throat. He needed some liquid courage.<p>

He needed to relax.

He wasn't going to rest until he knew Jerry was dead.

He took one last drink, wiping his mouth, and putting the bottle back up. He was still angry. He had too much built up inside and went straight from the kitchen, through the living room and to a room with a nice view of the backyard. He considered it his man cave, but all it had in it was his workout equipment. He exhaled slowly, looking around, trying to decide where to start. He pulled off his gray shirt and went straight for the punching bag hanging in the corner. He was glad Mellie was asleep. He didn't know if he could contain himself right now. The force of each punch rippled through his body, pulsing in every muscle. Every kick, every thud, every grunt, he felt all his energy leaving his exhausted body. He went hard at it for a good thirty minutes, then gave it up and went for chin ups.

He finished quickly when he heard Mellie get up, his feet landing loudly against the cold wooden floor, his chiseled body dripping with sweat. He grabbed his shirt and went back to their room, seeing his wife go through the stained wooden dresser, looking for something to wear. She pulled out her old Johnny Cash shirt and blue hoodie, shut the drawer, and saw a sweaty Fitz opening the closet.

"I'm about to take a bath, ok?" She tells him, feeling like a prisoner, having to report her every move to him.

Fitz grabbed a purple long sleeve shirt out of the closet and shut it quickly, throwing it on the bed and turning to her. He meets her halfway and leans in for a quick kiss, careful not to get too close, but is surprised when she pulls him in and dodges the kiss. She wraps her arms around him, running her hands down his wet back, taking in his scent. She rests her head on his bare chest and exhales softly, enjoying this. She loved his natural scent; it was extremely sexy to her.

"God, you smell good. I wondered where you went," she said softly into his hard chest.

"I had to burn off some energy," he tells her. She knew how tense and worked up he had been lately. "You want me to wash your back?"

"That would be nice," she says, agreeing with him. She enjoyed him taking care of her sometimes.

Neither one of them could believe she just agreed to this without any hesitation, that she was going to let him get this close. But he didn't question it.

He followed her into the bathroom, going to the sink to shave while she started her bath. She ran her warm water and took off her cozy pajamas, gently stepping in. Fitz restrained himself from looking at her as he stared in the mirror, careful not to miss any inch of his face. He shaved slowly, enjoying the sounds of his wife's soft singing as she bathed, preparing to wash her beautiful hair. He set his razor down and went over to her, sitting on the side of the tub and sticking his feet in the water surrounding her. He loved to take long baths with her.

"I'll wash your hair," he volunteers, grabbing the fruity shampoo and conditioner.

"Somebody is being awfully nice this evening," she smiles, looking into his eyes.

They both grinned and leaned in for a kiss, the smell of vodka on his breath surprising her. She could still taste it on his tongue, a familiar taste so bitter yet so sweet to her deprived taste buds.

"Tastes like someone had a little to drink," she teases.

"Only a little," he assured her.

Fitz smiles and removes his feet, getting up and grabbing a cup from the sink to use to wet her hair. He ran some warm water in it and poured it over her gorgeous brown hair, the water feeling good as it ran down her tired back. He pours some sweet smelling shampoo in his hands, lathering it up in between her curls. She closed her eyes, she was so trusting of him right now. He only looked at her body once as he massaged her head, knowing he couldn't break this trust right now. He rinsed the shampoo out and added in her fruity conditioner, then washed her back slowly, sensing she was also enjoying their little moment.

"Thank you," she whispers. "For everything these past few days. You take such good care of me. I'm sorry I've created such a commotion. I'll put out a statement tonight and ride this out. A few more days and it'll die down," she explains, feeling guilty.

"You haven't created any kind of commotion, Mels. This isn't your fault. And I wouldn't want to take care of anyone else but you," Fitz reminds her that none of this was caused by her.

He was in the process of rinsing her back when both of their phones rang simultaneously. She gave him a look that he knew all too well: something wasn't good. He grabbed their phones from the bedroom and handed her hers, then stepped back into the bedroom to answer his as she answered hers.

"Hello?" Fitz answers.

"Fitz, why is there video of you and Mellie dragging in a nearby hospital earlier this week?" Mike asks, wondering what is going on.

"-Jade, breathe for a second and slow down-" Jade cuts Mellie off.

"Someone found out," Jade says in a panic. "Someone knows you're pregnant and that you were raped. There's all sorts of rumors going around-"

"One channel says it was a rape kit, another says an abortion, the list goes on and on-" Mike explains to Fitz.

"I didn't say a word, Mel. I swear," Jade promises her best friend.

Fitz stood in the bathroom door, phone still pressed to his ear, Mellie's heart sinking as fast as his was. He knew Jackson was going to be pissed. His eyes met Mellie's and she set her phone down on the toilet, Jade still talking, getting out as quickly as she could. Fitz grabbed her towel and helped her dry off, then she picked up the phone again.

"Jade, I gotta go."

She hangs up and sighs, not wasting any time getting dressed. Fitz sits down on the edge of the bed, taking a minute to think, surprised Jackson hadn't already called. She sat down beside him, grabbing her computer and checking her email. It dinged constantly for an entire minute, her inbox flooded with interview requests. She scrolled through them all until she stopped at the only worthwhile one so far-the Huffington Post.

"Huffington Post wants an interview," she said without a second thought.

Fitz sighs and looks at the email, then picks up his phone. She grabs his phone from him and puts it down, picking up hers. She needed to take charge of the situation.

"I'll handle this. Time for damage control," she sighed.

She calls Jackson and he answers, clearly frustrated.

"Jackson Gregory, please hold-"

He immediately looked at the number and saw it was Mellie, apologizing.

"Sorry, Mels. Talk to me," Jackson said.

"How's it going there?" She asks, wondering how he's handling all the publicity.

"It could be worse. I've got the IT guys and the investigator trying to trace who leaked this. I'm so sorry, Mellie. I'm working on a press statement-"

"Huffington Post wants an interview," Mellie says, shutting him up for a minute.

"Accept nothing less than an physical interview. I trust you with the questions," he says, having faith in her.

"Ok," she says confidently.

"Don't go out if you can avoid it. Fitz needs to take extra security to work. This will all blow over, Mel. I promise. You know the drill. Keep the answers simple. Yes and no responses. Don't talk to reporters. Don't answer anything you don't feel comfortable with. It'll be ok. _I'm handling it," _he reminded her.

Mellie sighed with relief, knowing he was right. He was handling everything, and she had nothing to honestly worry about.

"Thank you, Jackson. I'll forward you the email about the interview."

"Ok. You two take it easy. I'll call if anything new comes up. Good night," he says.

"Bye."

Jackson hangs up, ignoring all his other calls, and picks up a mailing box out of his office floor. He grabs his scissors out of his top drawer and cuts through the tape, opening the box to reveal several stacks of money equaling to $250,000, and a note. It was a simple thank you note from the publisher he sold Fitz and Mellie's story to yesterday. He picked up a stack, thumbed through it with a smirk on his face, and set it back in its place. He taped the box back up and put it in his safe against the wall, then emailed the Huffington Post.

He had them right where he wanted them.

* * *

><p>"He said not to leave if it wasn't necessary, and for you to take extra security to work. He would set up the interview," Mellie tells Fitz as she set her phone down on the bed.<p>

Fitz rubbed his tired eyes, wondering why all this was happening to them, and stood up. His sticky body ached, and he handed her the remote off the nightstand. He was tired of everything.

"I'm going to take a shower. You can pick a movie or whatever you want to watch," he tells her, having little patience left.

As he walked into the bathroom, Mellie moved to the head of the bed, getting situated against some pillows and turning on the TV. She searches through the channels, finding nothing good to watch, deciding to find something on Netflix. She pulled a blanket on top of her, shivering beneath her hoodie. She was always cold natured, had been her entire life. Winter was her worst enemy. She found them a movie to watch after ten minutes of skimming through her queue and picked up her phone, looking for Ben's number. If they couldn't get out for dinner, she would have dinner brought to them.

Fitz came out of the bathroom ten minutes later with a creamy white towel wrapped around his waist, going to his drawer and putting on some clean blue boxers and shorts, along with his purple shirt on the bed. He combs his damp curls and lies down beside her in the bed, kissing her cheek. That shower had helped him feel much better.

"So what are we watching tonight?" He asks, snuggling up beside his wife.

"_The Dark Knight," _Mellie says with a smile, knowing he loved that movie.

"You sure did pick a good one. I'll get some snacks in a minute," he tells her.

He snuggles up next to her, putting his arm around her, needing to protect her. She buries her face into his warm chest, forgetting everything for a moment. Just going back to the two of them. Nothing else mattered. Not right now. Her heavy eyes closed slowly, falling asleep until they heard the front door open fifteen minutes later.

"Jer?" Fitz called out, curious as to who it was. Jerry was the only one who ever came home unannounced, and he always slammed the door. It was shut quietly this time.

Fitz sits up and goes to see who it is when Mellie grabs his arm and pulls him back.

"It's just Ben. Sit," Mellie commanded.

Fitz gave her a strange look and sat back down to see Ben walk in their room with a pizza box and grocery bag in hand.

"Hey," Ben says happily, glad he could help.

"Thank you so much, Ben," Mellie says in her usual sweet tone.

He sets everything down on the bed and Fitz looks at his wife and back at Ben, who wonders why his boss looks curious.

"You sure are sly," he says with a grin.

"It's in my blood," she reminds him, nudging his arm.

She and Ben laugh as Fitz reaches across the bed and shakes his hand.

"Thank you, man. Anything we can do for you or you want some pizza? At least help yourself to a beer in the fridge," Fitz offers.

"Help hold off that crowd at your gate," Ben jokes, hating going back out there. It was an absolute mess.

He laughs softly and Fitz rubs the back of his neck, hating all these people hanging around outside their property.

"I wish I could. Did the other four come out?"

"Yeah. I put three at the gate with Lance. Warren is with me and Chris on the house. I'm at the front if y'all need anything," Ben reminds them.

"Thanks again, Ben. Grab a few beers for you and the guys. If y'all need or want anything, just come in and get it," Fitz tells him. His house was their house.

"Yes sir. Thank you," he says, walking out of the room.

He pulls out his radio and goes back on official duty, then steps back outside to man the front porch. Meanwhile, Fitz opens the pizza box and sees half buffalo chicken, half meat lover's pizza. He closes the box and smiles, giving Mellie a kiss.

"God, you're the best," he says with a smile.

She smiles and reaches for the bag, but he gets to it first and starts emptying it of its contents.

"We got some cheddar chips...Dr. Pepper...and...for dessert, sour gummy worms. This sounds like a very personalized request, Mrs. Grant," he smiles, loving picking on his wife.

He teases her and she punches him in the arm as he opens the two liter of Dr. Pepper and takes a drink, almost making him spill it.

"You know you like it, Mr. Grant. I know meat lover's is your weakness. I even ordered extra cheese and bacon. You've never turned down chips and Dr. Pepper, either," she laughs softly, glad she remembered his favorite foods.

"You got me there," he shrugs with a smile, knowing it was the truth.

He goes to the kitchen and gets some plates and cups filled with ice, then comes back and snuggles up with her, enjoying their food and movie. Enjoying having her back.

Enjoying _her_.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: **I just want to thank everyone again who read even one chapter for reading. It means so much to me that someone wanted read my fanfiction and took the time out to do so. I have loved reading each and every one of your reviews. They mean a lot to me. So thank you. This was a lot of fun and emotional to write, but I loved it. If you have any unanswered questions about any character or storyline, just message me and I'll try my best to answer it. Thanks again and feel free to leave a review!

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing from ABC's _Scandal_.

* * *

><p>Fitz woke up around five Monday morning, dragging himself out of bed. He was glad to see Mellie was finally asleep since she didn't fall asleep until two. He felt a sudden chill and grabbed a worn t-shirt off the dresser and slipped it on. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and ran his fingers through his messy curls as he stumbled to the kitchen to get his coffee fix. He grabbed a cup out of the cabinet when he heard light footsteps running down the stairs and through the living room. He stepped into the living room and saw a young woman with brunette hair, barely half dressed in her skimpy clothes, running out the front door in a rush with her purse and shoes in hand. He ran after her, wondering why she was leaving in such a hurry, and opened the front door, seeing her push the gate open and run a few more feet down the sidewalk and jump into a cab. As it sped off, he knew she had to have called them; no cab normally ran this far out. He shut the door and called the guard at the gate, asking if he knew what was going on.<p>

"Hey Doug, you know anything about the girl that just ran out?" Fitz asks, still staring out the front window, wondering what just happened.

"All I know is she came in with Jerry around one this morning. No name, no picture, nothing. Sorry, Fitz," Doug says.

"Thanks anyway, man."

Fitz hangs up and holds on to his phone as he walks back through the house, towards the flight of fifteen stairs. He passes the downstairs guest room and sees Mellie sit up, trying to wake up enough to figure out what's going on. He goes in and she sleepily looks at the clock, then back at him.

"What was all the noise about?" She asks groggily, her eyes heavy.

"I'm about to go upstairs and find out. Some girl Jerry brought home last night just ran out of here and jumped in a cab," Fitz says curiously.

"That's unusual for him. He likes to keep them around for breakfast most of the time," she remembers.

"I'll be back down in a second. You stay right there," he tells her, wanting to keep her safe.

Mellie rolls her eyes as he walks out of the room and slowly up the stairs, listening for anything, still not sure why she left in such a hurry. He makes it to the top of the stairs and sees the other guest bedroom at the end of the hall with the door wide open. His heart begins to beat faster as his palms sweat, almost causing him to drop his phone. He takes a deep breath as he steps into the room and looks around. He sees the blinds open, an empty tequila bottle on the carpet by the nightstand, Jerry's clothes in the floor by the bed - nothing out of the ordinary for him.

He looks closer at Jerry and touches his arm to wake him when he realizes it's cool to the touch. Fitz's body immediately went into shock mode, feeling his forehead and realizing he was no longer breathing. He threw back the covers and grabbed his wrist, not feeling a pulse either. He took a step back as his heart beat faster, not believing this at all.

This couldn't be real.

He couldn't be dead.

He subconsciously dials Jackson, knowing he'll be at work this early with everything going on lately.

"Hel-" Fitz cuts Jackson off mid-greeting.

"I think Jerry's dead," Fitz says, his voice shaking, trying to get past the huge lump in his throat. He was going to be sick.

"_Excuse me?"_ Jackson asks in disbelief.

Jackson shook his head, thinking he was being pranked as he saw another aide come on down the hall and turn on the lights.

"He brought a girl home last night and she just, she just ran out of the house and, and I came upstairs to ask w-why she left and I touched his arm and he's cold and not breathing and his heart isn't beating and he's dead, oh God-"

Jackson almost dropped his phone, his heart skipping a beat. This had to be a joke. Not this now too. It couldn't be. His brain immediately went into overdrive. He could hear Fitz trying to fight the sobs.

"Fitz, stop and listen to me. Take a deep breath and pull it together. Call Ben and calmly tell him to get the medic over there ASAP. They'll assess the situation and take him to the hospital. You don't touch a thing, alright?" He told him, trying to calm him down.

"Ok," Fitz mumbles through his heartbreaking sobs.

"Is Mellie up?" Jackson asks.

"S-She woke up when she heard the girl leave," he stutters in shock.

"I'll tell her when I get there. Just stay calm, Fitz. I'll be there in ten," Jackson assures him.

They both hang up at the same time, and Fitz continues staring at his dead father's expressionless face. He was gone. Forever. He was never coming back. Fitz's heart was broken; both of his parents were gone now. They may have always been at odds, but Jerry was still his father. He also felt anger towards him continue to grow in his chest. He despised that man and had longed to see this day for years, especially since he hurt Mellie.

He finally felt free of the burden.

Free of that disgust, that weight, that dark cloud constantly hanging over him.

His phone rang softly as he called Ben, wiping his eyes and trying to regain his composure.

"Yes sir?" Ben answers.

"Ben, I need you to quietly get the medic out here. I think Jerry is dead," Fitz says quietly.

"Yes sir," Ben says, never changing his tone.

Ben's hand trembles as he reaches for his secure cell phone, calling the medics to come to the house. He didn't say what for, just not to waste any time getting there. He comes in the front door and shuts it quietly, going upstairs and down the hall, finding Fitz sitting in the floor with his back against the wall, his face buried in his hands. Muffled sobs came from his mouth, and Ben knelt beside him, putting his arm around him. He began softly saying a few comforting words to him, trying to calm him down. All Fitz did was cry into Ben's shoulder, not caring what he thought of him right now, whether or not he was getting too upset over this. It hurt more than he realized it would.

"I know it hurts, Fitz. I do. But it's going to be ok. It really will be. But I need you to do me a favor and calm down and go clean yourself up before Mellie sees you. You need to be strong for her. This is a life changing moment for both of you. You need to look halfway composed when you walk out of here once the private investigator gets here after the medics call him. He'll ask you to leave while his team investigates. We'll drive you to my house about ten minutes down the road. Kelly and I have plenty of space for y'all for as long as you need," he explains, trying to help Fitz.

Fitz wipes his eyes and tries to regulate his breathing again, so thankful for his security team, who were really showing up to be their best friends.

"Thank you...so, so much, Ben," Fitz chokes out.

"Yes sir."

He stands up and readjusts his gun and badge on his belt, then takes Fitz's hand and helps him up.

"Let's go get cleaned up a little," Ben suggests, heading to his room.

He follows him down the hall to their master bedroom, looking through his dresser for him a clean shirt while Fitz washes his face and combs his hair. He pulls out a plain white t-shirt and grabs his leather jacket out of the closet, handing it to him when he came out.

"You can't go out in a dirty shirt. Where are your jeans?" He asks.

"Downstairs in the guest room," Fitz replies almost inaudibly, his entire body and mind still in shock. He couldn't believe it. Jerry was gone in an instant. Here one second, gone the next.

Ben goes back downstairs and sees three medics coming in with two bags and a stretcher, heading up the stairs, probably not fully prepared for what they're about to find. He makes it to the guest room and knocks on the open wooden door, not wanting to intrude on Mellie. She sits up and puts her phone down after having checked the news for the morning, surprised to see him in the doorway. She sees another medic run in and leans forward, wondering what's happening.

"Where's Fitz? Why are the medics here? Is he ok?" She asks in a panic, wondering where her husband was.

"He's still upstairs. I just came to get him some jeans."

"_What are the medics doing here?" _She raises her voice and asks again worriedly.

Ben sighs and walks to the large bed, sitting on the edge, the softness welcoming after a night of guarding. He takes her hands into his and tries to think of a good way to tell her.

"Mellie...when he went upstairs to figure out why the girl left so fast...he found Jerry dead. He wasn't breathing, his heart had stopped, everything. He already called Jackson. He's on his way too and..."

Mellie's palms began to sweat in disbelief, in shock, as she tuned Ben out.

Dead.

Her father-in-law was _dead_.

The man who _raped_ her was _dead_.

He was gone. He no longer had control of her. She was free. Fitz was free.

_They were free._

"...you'll have to get dressed. The PI will have to investigate the scene and ask you to leave. You'll come to our house until the investigation is over. Then-"

"_He's dead?" _She whispers in disbelief, her hands shaking, a tightness forming in her chest as her heart sank to her stomach.

Ben paused and closed his eyes briefly, nodding as his lips parted slowly. Her hands squeezed his tighter. She was feeling something. She wasn't sure what it was, whether it was sadness or fear, anger or joy.

Joy, she decided.

Brief sadness for her husband's loss, but she knew he was happy too. He couldn't show it yet, but he was.

"Yes," Ben whispered.

She felt a wave of relief wash over her as she exhaled slowly, a few tears streaming down her face as Ben took her into his arms. He held her close and she was relieved. He couldn't hurt her anymore, he couldn't hurt Fitz, he couldn't hurt their child.

They hear Jackson come in a few minutes later and he stops at the guest room, seeing Ben getting Fitz some jeans and going upstairs.

"Mellie. We need to talk-"

"He told me," she fires back.

"What do you need me to do?" Jackson asks.

Mellie growled quietly, still upset with him from their conversation the other day.

"Go see about Fitz. Chris and Lance can help me pack our stuff."

Lance and Chris came up beside him, a few of the other guys in the living room and kitchen, wondering who they need to follow and watch right now. Jackson walked out of the room without saying a word, knowing he was not on her good side. They followed him upstairs so they could get a bag for Fitz and Mellie, and watched as he walked down the hall and saw the medics tending to Jerry. Lance knocked on the bedroom door and Ben opened it, Fitz still trying to fully calm down as he finished getting dressed.

"How did she take it?" Fitz asks nervously, still trying to stop the tears from coming to his swollen, hurting red eyes.

"She couldn't believe it at first. I think she was... relieved, sir," Ben says.

Fitz nodded and saw the boys in the door, and quickly went from a mess to professional.

"What do you need, guys?"

"We just came to get a bag for you and Mellie so we could pack some clothes for you," Lance explains.

"Thank you, Lance. They're in the closet," Fitz nods towards the closet, then looks back at Ben.

They went over to the closet and got two small suitcases out and headed back downstairs to help Mellie pack. Fitz walked into the master bathroom and grabbed a few things, stopping to look around the room, and then leading Ben out.

"I just need to get my bag out of my office and I'll be ready," he tells him.

He goes downstairs to his office, opening the door and turning on the light, seeing his leather bag in the floor by his desk. He grabs a handful of files off his desk, a book off the shelf, and his favorite ballpoint pen and puts them all in his bag. He zips it up and Ben grabs it before he could, just wanting to get Fitz and Mellie out of this chaos.

"I'll put this in the car and come back for the suitcases, sir."

Fitz nods and watches as he carries his bag to the car, then sees the medics coming down the stairs with a black body bag strapped to the stretcher. He stops in his office doorway, frozen at the sight of his dead father being carried out of his house.

His father was dead. Gone.

He comes to a minute later and goes across the living room and into the guest room, finding Mellie changing into her t-shirt and blue hoodie from yesterday. She puts on her gray jeans and boots, then turns around to see him come in and look through the closet once more.

"_Fitz_," she whispers, knowing how hurt he is right now.

His eyes meet hers as he turns around and she watches his fill with tears as she approaches him. She hugs him tightly, rubbing his back and whispering to him, trying to calm him down as intense sobs left his body. His own father, whether he liked him or not, had just died. This was not something to come back from so easily.

But they knew as one door closed, another would open. He was gone, and he could not longer haunt her. Now Fitz could have more political freedom. He could prove that he was different than his father. He could change the family name and image for the better.

"It will be ok, baby. Just give it some time," Mellie whispers confidently to him.

Fitz nods and pulls away, wiping his eyes, smiling at her.

"I'm just glad you're free. He can't get you, he can't get _us _anymore, Mels," he said as she looked into his bloodshot eyes.

She nods silently and smiles, hugging him again. He takes in her scent, wishing he could keep some in a bottle forever. She lets go and he goes over to the full-length mirror leaning against the wall, combing his hair quickly and grabbing the second suitcase, zipping it up. She puts her curls up in a messy bun on top of her head and looks back at her husband.

"You ready?" He asks.

Mellie grabs her crutches and Fitz grabs the second bag, leading the way into the living room. He looked around and took it in, the kitchen, his office door, the sliding glass door to the back patio, the stairs, the chandelier attached to the tall ceiling, the skylight, everything.

Lance comes back in and takes the bags from Fitz, leading them out to the SUV. Ben gets in Fitz's truck and pulls out first, slowly pushing through the cameras blocking the street outside the front gate. Fitz puts his arm around his wife as they walk outside, their first time seeing sunlight since the rumors started flying. They stepped out of the house, feeling like they had just finished one battle, and knew they were going head first into another as the cameras began flashing from the street. He helps her into the backseat of the gray SUV, putting her crutches in the truck, and getting in beside her as Lance starts the car, driving off slowly.

Fitz ignores the banging on the side door and yelling from the reporters as they get out of the gate and down the street, and instead focuses on the awfully quiet woman next to him. He notices she's deep in thought as she looks out the window, her breathing quiet, her body looking more relaxed. He unbuckled his seat belt and scoots over to her, wrapping his arms around her fragile body, buried under her large hoodie. She closes her eyes, letting out a big sigh as her body begins to tremble.

"I can't get his face out of my mind. It's all I see. Over and over, that smile on his face, the joy he got from hurting me. He raped me, Fitz. _Me_. I know that sounds selfish, but you will never know what that feels like, having every single ounce of self-worth and innocence and joy sucked right out of you, right before your very eyes. I will never be the same person again," she says through her sobs.

She tries to catch her breath but hyperventilates more as he holds her tight. Fitz sheds a few tears as he strokes her hair, his heart officially broken.

She bursts into tears, tears of happiness as she hugs him back, now sobbing. It was in this moment that she finally accepted he was gone and she and control of her own life again. She could do as she pleased, she had no one watching her every move, no one threatening her. It was all over.

_"_But now_... I'm free."_


End file.
